'Allo me old china - wot say we pop round the Jack. I'll stand you a pig and you can rabbit on about your teapots. We can 'ave some loop and tommy and be off before the dickory hits twelve.
or, to translate
Hello my old mate (china plate) - what do you say we pop around to the bar (Jack Tar). I'll buy you a beer (pig's ear) and you can talk (rabbit and pork) about your kids (teapot lids). We can have some soup (loop de loop) and supper (Tommy Tucker) and be gone before the clock (hickory dickory dock) strikes twelve.
Here's another..
"Got to my mickey, found me way up the apples, put on me whistle and the bloody dog went. It was me trouble telling me to fetch the teapots."
which really means,
"Got to my house (mickey mouse), found my way up the stairs (apples and pears), put on my suit (whistle and flute) when the phone (dog and bone) rang. It was my wife (trouble and strife) telling me to get the kids (teapot lids)."
The trouble with cockney rhyming slang is it is out of date before the ink is dry. If anybody wants to get a taste of it try watching a British tv series called Minder. A minder is cockney for a bodyguard or a heavy. Not all cockney is rhyming slang. It can get quite complicated. For example black men are often refered to as Mac on a building site etc. This is where it comes from. A slanf g term for a balck person is 'coon'. This rhymes with macaroon. This gets abbreviated to 'macca' when used as a verb and Mac to their face. It starts off being rude and then ends up being friendly. That is very cahracteristic of cockney. A good natured rudness quite unlike a New Yorker. There is no underlying aggresion just good humor.
Incidentally JMO you did not hear my full accent. The volume got tyrned down on that about 20 years ago. Nobody could understand anything I said for the first 3 days I was in America. What is more I couldn't undersatnd Americans. That was a very unpleasant experience and I was glad when it straightened out. Now I speak with a very watered down accent.
Me pukkah bunny is as thick as a dockers sandwich. (My real speech has a really strong accent). As I have said before there are no accents in America. You only think there are.
TD is right until you have heard a couple of geordies get into it you have no idea what a British accent is all about. As for the Scots they vary in accent by 60 miles. Glaswegian is very thick and Edinburgh is very posh. Week the wee jobie Jimmy:)))
The trouble with cockney rhyming slang is it is out of date before the ink is dry. If anybody wants to get a taste of it try watching a British TV series called Minder. A minder is cockney for a bodyguard or a heavy. Not all cockney is rhyming slang. It can get quite complicated. For example black men are often referred to as Mac on a building site etc. This is where it comes from. A slang g term for a black person is 'coon'. This rhymes with macaroon. This gets abbreviated to 'macca' when used as a verb and Mac to their face. It starts off being rude and then ends up being friendly. That is very characteristic of cockney. A good natured rudeness quite unlike a New Yorker. There is no underlying aggression just good humor.
Incidentally JMO you did not hear my full accent. The volume got turned down on that about 20 years ago. Nobody could understand anything I said for the first 3 days I was in America. What is more I couldn't understand Americans. That was a very unpleasant experience and I was glad when it straightened out. Now I speak with a very watered down accent.
Me pukkah bunny is as thick as a dockers sandwich. (My real speech has a really strong accent). As I have said before there are no accents in America. You only think there are.
TD is right until you have heard a couple of Geordies get into it you have no idea what a British accent is all about. As for the Scots they vary in accent by 60 miles. Glaswegian is very thick and Edinburgh is very posh. Week the wee jobie Jimmy :)))
My personal peeve with Brits is the anoying habit of ending a sentence with an upwards inflection and the word 'yeah'. Apparently requesting agreement or approval. It is insincere and really annoying. It is the same as the valley girl thing that is almost identical. Mind you I wouldn't mind finding out if a valley girl's thing really is identical.
Okay gents,
That was a good quick education. I really gave myself a chance to try and understand the Scots but they were on a drinking binge also ........
"In school I learned that cockney is an accent spoken in London, exclusively in the area covered by the Big Ben's bells."
A true cockney has to be born within the sound of Bow bells. However nowadays anybody with a Londonish accent is deemed to be speaking with a cockney accent. I was born in Edmonton which strictly speaking is in Middlesex. However it is within what was Greater London. Nowadays there is no Greater London as London has expanded and takes in bits of all the surrounding counties. They are called the Home Counties. It became very confusing.
JMO
Could it be that you really saw our Caledonian brethren drinking? Imbibing the devils liquid? It must be a mistake. In Key West of all places? The driest county in Florida? Incidentally how dry do you like your martinis?
Seriously Scots are the biggest lushes, quickly followed by the Irish and extremely hard on their heels the English. All Brits have hollow legs and are trained from infancy to drink vast quantities. This is accompanied by packets of crisps and pork pies and for the less inhibited pickled eggs. At the end of every Saturday night there is always the ritual, communal throwing up. This takes place just outside the local Chinese take out while waiting for a curry.
Ok my thread has gone off in a bizarre direction and it was JMO's fault. So screw it this one is definitely dead. I still think a single definitive thread for advice and scam sketches is a good idea but I guess I am the only one. In the same vein somebody could ressurect "fight club" remember that?
Lunatic! How dare you Messiuer!!
(Speaks from kneeling position in full Napoleon uniform complete with hat and hand stuck in waistcoat)
To the guillotine with him!!
(Hobbles off stage left, theatrically waving at non existent crowd. Nurse waits in doorway with large hypodermic flanked by 2 large black attendants.)
Hey watch it with calling Irish second place drinkers you damned imported american. Or I might have to drive by your house and deliver a real Irish Cocktail and it won't have Old Bushmills in the bottle with the rag attached.LOL!!
Here we go. Let's bomb Izi, great !!
It is always the same. Take one bottle of Johnny Walker, a gun, a cause, mix in some Irish and bingo a revolution :)))
Actually I find the Irish far more friendly than the Scots any day of the week. Haven't encountered any Scots in America only Irish or 20th generation Irish.
"Yep, my great, great, great, great aunt on my cousins side was once bitten by a leprachaun" "So I am Irish by default and blood poisoning":))
Yes folks buy new Lepracondoms.
The next time she says:-
"Begorrah Shamus will you be waxing your shelaleigh tonight?"
Make sure you are wearing the green.
No Irishman with class would drink Johnny Walker! Blended scotch is for the birds. Single malt for this Mick here, but I do prefer Old Bushmills when I have my gun, my cause and my bingo dobber! LOL
Back to the theme of this thread.
I have had a woman from Moscow interested in me for a while now. The truth has come out in dribbles. She came here 5 years ago on a B1 visa at the invitation of a university then continued to stay. Now like so many others she doesn't want to leave and advertised herself on EWM.
I bookmarked her a long time ago and one thing led to another. She showed as being in the USA. This is very tempting becase it is so much eassier to see a woman here rather than go to FSU. Not only that but you avoid all the legalities that Jet and Toad are going through right now. Logical right?
The problem is that in her profile she doesn't say she is an illegal alien and needs a greencard. Aha!! The truth will set you free !!
Now don't get the wrong idea she really does wnat to find the love of her life. But there is this liiittttle complication.
For me there would always be a nagging doubt that she only married me for the paperwork and my knowhow to tackle this problem. I am something of an expert.
Things have changed in America. Marrying someone does not guarantee residency automatically like it did once. It is a crap shoot. You are much better off finding someone in Russia and bringing her in legally the way we all normally do. It is above board and although frustrating it is legal and within the system.
So if you see anyone who is saying that they live in the USA be careful. It does not discount them, there are many women in the USA completely legally but their profies are usually stamped with the same traits that we despise amongst the American women. i.e Must make $75,000 a year want to be treated like a queen etc.
I will stick with the selection in FSU and never again contact one here already. I had another one in California who was here visiting her son. In my mind that raised so many flags that I quickly walked away.
I sometimes think you worry about things you shouldn't. Like marrying you for paperwork. I mean first of all, if she's here in the states I wouldn't be talking to her anyway. It would seem to me a waste of time to do that. So far Larissa's visa application is moving along smoothly. I was hoping for an interview during the week of July 11th, but the window of opportunity has closed.
Also my criteria about a woman asking about my income wasn't a problem. I had a couple ask and I said to them I can afford to visit you and I can afford to have you here, so until you live here and understand the cost of living my income is irrelevant. It is also irrelevant because a guy making 150,000 a year has a debt service that strangles him and I have things on the side and can save money.I was surprised that immigration didn't question my CD's, mutual fund and money market savings on my income statement I submitted for proof of financial support. So if a woman asked me about my income it wasn't necessarily a red flag, but it was something I made a note of in the back of my mind. Until they understand the mechanics of our economy how much you make they can never understand anyway. The first time I met Larissa, I asked her why she never inquired about it. She said a clever man can support his family, also if I didn't like you for some reason no amount of money was going to get her to come with me. I can see their point of view in asking. I think the truly honest ones want to know a little, the one's that pry for more information are the one's that concern me.
I truly don't think you understood the thrust of this post. If you go to Yahoo Personals what I said will apply. It says so right up front on what they are looking for. I do not think it is unreasonable to ask how much I earn. I consider somebody who makes $75,000 a year a rich man. Therefore any woman who asks that I have at least that much each year is a gold digger. Period.
If on the other hand she is genuinely interested in me fine. With 2 jobs we will have maybe 75 to 80 grand a year and all will be well. teamwork my friend. Any woman who has lived here for 5 years has changed especially if she is from Moscow. They are already arrogant to begin with. Natasha displayed that to me yet again. I should just do as I am told. You had to be there ok.
As for worrying about the wrong things you are joking right? Being concerned about being married for paperwork is an invalid concern? Absolutely not. If she lives in the States already and is illegal and tells you up from when asked what she wants out of life is a greencard and a decent job I am highly on guard. That isn't what I want to hear. I want to hear you and family. Correct answer.
Conclusion is that if they are here ilegally they are highly suspect in their motivation.
Frankly, Izi I do not understand why this illegal woman could present ANY threat to you.
What the hell...tell her that since she is illegally in the US, in order to win your interest she has to fly to Florida on her dime.
To keep your interest, she will have to do ALL the things you expect a woman to do for her man...or else!
Why dragging the communication with her if there is no future?
I thought I would resurect this thread that I started to explain the different scam scearios. Questions have come up in several threads lately and a lot of your answers are right here in the one location. I type my fingers off sticking this stuff in here so read it and I hope it helps a little to avoid the tricksters and some of the pitfalls.
Incidentally I was always hoping that others would add to this thread and really make it a valuable resource and not just me mouthing off. So come and and please drop your exerience in here.