Hi, one and all.
Imagine a Foreign Brides website with ladies100% genuine! A site where the chances of a scam artist succeeding in trickery was narrowed down to almost nil, whereby any suspect behaviour was swiftly dealt with, and dealt with properly! Imagine letters that you received were undeniably genuine and not doctored or written by agencies! A site who might not, therefore, guarantee replies the next day or days, but in turn ‘could’ guarantee any reply as being genuine and word for word in its translation! Imagine your efforts and endeavours were spent namely on the tradition of ‘winning a ladies hand’ and not being used up in trying to fathom the real from fake! That the term unsuccessful ‘DID NOT’ mean that you were un-investigative and un-resourceful in being able to ‘figure out’ or ‘decipher’ whether or not she was real (isn’t that the agencies job after all !!??) but infact the term unsuccessuful took on its true meaning (in the context of winning a ladies hand that is) which is, that one or the other or both, simply did not get on, or that she has already found her prospective partner, which would leave you to be able to move on to the next prospective partner and therefore not get strung along in a web of lies and deceit leading to nowhere, or worse, heartache.
Am I asking too much? Is such a Foreign Brides site an impossibility? Do we honest genuine men deserve this quality, quality of life? should this be the new standard and be done once and for all with scammers and liars? Would such a site promote a more positive view on FSU marriages? And most importantly, do the agencies care enough for their clientele to make the necessary changes to make this happen?
Well I certainly know the answers to most of these questions, unfortunately questions like the last I cannot answer, maybe Fiance.com can answer? Or maybe I can make a suggestion? Why before creating a profile do you not agree specific terms such as Passport, National Insurance Number (or equivalent) References from professionals (doctor, dentist e.t.c), Utility bills for proof of address, Proof of status as in Unemployment card, University I.D, or Works I.D, a Drivers Licence, and any other means of I.D deemed necessary for the enrolment of a lady to an agency and also for agencies like Fiance.Com to do the same if not more amount of checks on other smaller agencies wishing to join them.
Of course, many ladies (and agencies) would be put off with such an array of requirements, at least it would leave the most genuine to bear. Yes, I would gladly provide all of this information, and more! Were it to satisfy a guaranteed and forward thinking correspondence with someone that I mutually was getting along with, so why not her?
Lets put renegade agencies out of business and pave the way for a revolutionary Foreign relations network, Fiance.Com do you believe you could meet such a standard?
harmony, fiance.com is not an agency. it is a normal personals site, where anybody can register and start using the site, place personal profile. Fiance.com can not control somebody’s minds, or actions, read terms and conditions, think with your head. Nobody sells you foreign brides here. we get passports sometimes, checking addresses, phone numbers, checking agencies, working with authorities. But it will not safe you from your own mistakes. it will not guarantee you that persona who send her/his passport to fiance would not cheat. it is internet, think, ask others. fiane.com provides all tools necessary for you to thinks, and not be scammed.
Great post! Unfortunately, the dirty little secret behind all the fraud and deceit are what drive this industry. The FSU intro biz is built on the myth that there are unlimited numbers of beautiful women with perfect character just waiting for "a nice guy" like you. Doesn't matter if you're a complete geek, completely broke, hideously fat, or horribly ugly. All you have to be is a "nice guy" and these babes will be taking a number to get in line to write you letters. They will spend their days just waiting to get a letter from "Joe Loser" living in Podunk, No Where.
The reality is that if the the agencies only listed the BEAUTIFUL women who are legitimate, sincere, and are honestly committed to the process of meeting / marrying someone from outside their country there would only be about 5% of the number listed on a website. If the agency websites lacked the stunning babes there wouldn't be nearly the interest and consequently, no business. They've created the illusion that the FSU women featured in their agencies are somehow unique in their beauty and character. The important point to understand is that these agencies position in Russian or Ukranian society is about the same as an American dating agency. I'm not saying they operate the same, I referring to the position they hold in the context of FSU society.
My favorite quote of all time was made by a nice looking translator an Odessa based agency. I asked why there were no members as nice looking as her or the other ladies working for the agency. She replied "Most of our ladies can't find a are not attractive enough to find a man to date them so they come here hoping to find a foreigner." :)
So true, thanks for your post buffed, i guess we all thrive on the hope of meeting that ''one in a million'' (according to statistics, that saying could be literal!!) even if against the odds, maybe theres no winning, even Fiance.com seem agitated.LoL.
It's great to hear accounts of people succeeding with these sites but i sometimes wonder, were they to spend that kind of time and that kind of money dedicated to tracking down the 'right' lady in their own country, the success rate would most likely be the same if not better!. well anyway judging by what i've learnt i guess we are still a long way off from the dream of a perfectly working FSU dating site.
I think you'll find that those that find their one in a million do not dedicate their time, indeed their lives, trawling website after website and writing letter after letter.
I think you'll find that they jump on an aeroplane or two, during their weeks of holiday each year, tracking her down that way, it proves to be far more successful method of meeting, rather than looking at pictures of, the ladies.
Good call Martin!!! I personally am grateful to scammers, or at least one in particular. Last year I got an email out of the blue, and she fell in love with me after two letters (pictures were nice though :P). I hadn't even considered a lady from the FSU prior to that, but it got me looking. Day after tomorrow I am going back to Ukraine for my third visit, to see a wonderful woman who is now my fiancee. On thursday we have an appointment at the British Embassy. By the end of the month she will be here with me. And all because of a scammer. So Princess76, if you are reading this, many thanks,if you can get a visa you are very welcome at our wedding!!!
Chedz, what are the profile numbers and websites of the ones who didn't make the cut. Point being, if you're not writing babes why even bother, you can grab just about any non-babe off the street and the FSU and they'd be tickled to death some guy would talk to them. My ex-wife from Odessa said it best "Any unattractive woman from Ukraine will wake up every morning, get on her hands and knees with hands cupped, sobbingly thanking you for marrying her."
Define unattractive.....I ask that as some that I find very attractive, friends of mine would not and vise versa. When I was younger I had a close friend that thought any woman say 5'5" and UNDER 250 lbs was not worth even speaking to. He was 6'2" and if he went 160 lbs soaking wet I would be surprised. Go figure.
''I think you'll find that those that find their one in a million do not dedicate their time, indeed their lives, trawling website after website and writing letter after letter.''
I think you mis-understood, what i mean is that while agencies like to make out that there is a gorgeous girl for all of us, the truth is that finding this wonderful lady could be as hard as winning the lotto, what with the scamm=money equation. A 100% genuine ladies only website is what i speak of, i'm dumbfounded this is not more of an issue? Obviously if you find the right girl and you've met and made future plans your searches would stop, i was talking about accounts of guys that have succeeded and are telling their stories. I think its great to hear them, but i don't think it makes up for what seems to be an epidimic of un genuine behaviour here.
wmferg...beauty is in the eye of the beholder,,,we've all heard that one! LoL.
I wonder. Is there a site that will offer a posting and an introduction free? Didn't think so. At the same time I wonder what the 30 dollars (or more) a month goes to... After all an internet site takes little or nothing to run. So, that said I can only assume that we are all on this site doing the same thing, looking for that 1 in a million. weather it is to marry or set on a cupboard. they definently all sound like they mean what they say, and most are good looking (in my estimation), but common sense rules the equation. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. I ramble... don't know about the rest of you but meeting that 'special' someone in the corner pub is not happening. Women in the US seem to be so full of themselves that they have no time left after preening and looking in the mirror to appreciate what any guy has to offer. Guess that is what atracted me to this site in the first place... tired of getting burned by the local honeys.
Harmony and buffed - Doesn't matter where you go, there are always going to be scammers somewhere. Read past posts/subject matter here and you'll find ways to avoid them concerning FSU women. We all know that not every site of FSU women is legit, just as all the women are not legit. Then again, neither are some of the gentlemen that are members here looking for a bride, but instead some sexual slave that they can store away and be the sole master of. That's not going to happen. Do not even think that FSU women are that stupid.
Martin-UK - Enjoy your perspective concerning FSU women. It's personal and upfront.
Chedz - Keep moving forward, you'll have your reward at the end of the process.
Preydor - FSU women are like all women, they love to look attractive. My FSU g/f here told me last night that she needed to go to a Russian hairstylist so that person would understand what she wanted, I said great, want to go? She said "da", and that even if she went last week, any woman would want to go again, all Russian women like to have the opportunity to look their best. Maybe you should appreciate the time that women take in to get ready for whomever. Women know that you do if you tell them that they look "beautiful" instead of "hot" or “sexy”... big difference.
So if there is a car in a showroom that you want to buy do you continue to stand on the outside of the showroom admiring the paintwork and reading the sales pitch or do you walk through the showroom door to try it for yourself.
There is an open door to the FSU, stop reading the sales pitch of the showrooms and get yourself through that open door!
You've misunderstood my post, but "thanks" for the advice:)!! Golly, I'll be sure to shake the dust off my clothes and climb back on that turnip truck I just fell off:) How on earth could you have read my post and conclude that I was naive enough to fall for a scam??!!! I know this agency / correspondence gig inside and out.
Correspondence should be used for simply sourcing and screening women to meet in-person. The problem is that few legitimate ATTRACTIVE women are sincerely joining these agencies with the intention of meeting foreign men. The vast majority of BABES listed on websites are not actively seeking a man, in fact, a good portion of them probably don't even know they are listed on an agency!!
Many of the profiles are obtained from modeling agencies or women who thought they had submitted them to modeling agencies. I corresponded with several and met a few in-person who had no idea that they were listed on an introduction agency, they either had sumbitted photos to a modeling agency or a friend had signed them up without their knowledge. However, I don't necessarily dismiss the agencies for doing this, in fact, I have received many reply letters from ladies who had no idea that they were listed on an agency but liked my letter and wanted to get to know me anyway.
This is why I don't even care how an agency comes up with the ladies. As long as they can deliver on providing correct contact information of single, attractive women that's all it really boils down to, after that, it's up to the guy to make his pitch. The part I have a problem with is the phony correspondence they use to defraud people. Not because I'm going to fall for any of it, but because of the time it wastes. That's why I'm straight to the point in wanting their direct contact info and cut the sickening "I love to walk barefoot through the meadow smelling the Spring flowers and fresh-cut grass between my toes" bull-sh**t letters that make me want to puke.
The problem is there's an endless pool of saps out there who fall for this correspondence bologne. Your involvment in correspondence should be limited to simply determining if there's a enough interest and compatibility to arrange an in-person meeting. Your core plan should be to spend as much time "in-country" as possible using a variety of resources to meet ladies.
There are prospective ladies that can be tapped from the pool of agency talent. Unfortunately, these low-life affiliates try to scam cash through fake letter writing which makes it a pain-in-the-ass to know what profiles are legit.
So true Buffed, so true....... I was once in that pool of saps also. As i have said before , the only beleivable replies i have ever received were the ones who said they were not interested in me in their first response. My many experiences tell me to simply go to a social or fly there and knock on the agencies door and start from there. Website e-mails are a complete waste of time . If you can`t tell that the replies sent to you are being fictiously composed by someone else which most of them are you need to wake up. When their replies do not parallel with your letter to them or they avoid questions and or requests for contact information then one needs to remove their head from inside their ass.
buffed...I totally agree, although it seems some of the guys here have found the exceptions and it is working out. The key is knowing what you're reading and how they're responding. I've made contacts throug h a couple of agencies I learned about on this forum and so far, so good. I can see how they're trying to make a few more $$ from me, but I haven't seen any dishonesty and the letters seem genuine and responsive to what I ask them about. And I am doing just that...using it as a process to see if I want to actually meet them in person and take it from there.
Interesting conclusion, although not proved in fact. In the couple of years that have been on this site I can think of no one that has had success just popping over and meeting someone, I know of only one person, jet, that has been successful at the socials. However if I am correct there have been around ten successful relationships through letter writing, nas being the latest. It would seem to me that no matter how you meet, IE; just going over there or through socials, there will be a need to engage in letter writing to determine if there is really any long term compatibility, unless of course you have the time and finances to spend six months or so there. I prefer to do the letter writing first before I take the time and money to fly halfway around the world for a date. I have been to Ukraine four times now to see two ladies met through letter writing. The first was everything she claimed to be, we were just not able to live in the same house together. The second…we are in the process of getting her K-1 now. In the process of meeting these two ladies I went through countless letters from ladies that either did not seem sincere or just did not feel right and of course the usual “I need money for my heart transplant”. I have found that if you don’t fall in love with a photo and think with your big head and not the little one , your chances of success go up considerably.
Bill...I agree with your comments also. I guess I am a cross between you and buffed. I definitely believe in the letter writing and I couldn't agree with you more on your last sentence. I am using writing the letters as a way to narrow it down to a couple of genuine ladies that I know I would like to meet in person, meet them, and see how it goes from there. The letters for me are an introduction tool. I am not into playing games or multiple women to date, but for me, I can't let myself move further emotionally until I've met them. I don't have a b ack-up in case one doesn't work out. I may like them both, and have to make a decision from there. And I'm not misleading anyone in my letters or establishing some relationship in what I write. I'm going over there (Ukraine) in a couple of weeks to meet a couple of ladies, who at this point seem genuine and sincere in their desire to meet someone. I am also going to spend a day or two by myself interacting with the local scene and experience that. Then, if, and only if, there is major chemistry with someone, I will then commit myself one hundred and ten percent and see how the relationship develops.
With both women, I wrote around six months before I went to visit. I had a couple of requirements before I would commit to go. First did she make an effort to write daily. I did not demand it but if three or four days went by with out a letter and the reason was “I was just to busy” that would cause her to be sent packing. After writing for a month or so I felt if the lady was too busy to write then she wasn’t committed to building a relationship. One thing for the guys that are new here…translation is difficult…we made sure that if something is said that hurts the others feelings, before offense is taken, follow up questions are asked. Yesterday I installed a ceiling fan and I told Lena about it in last nights letter. Fortunately I sent a photo as her online translator translated “ceiling fan” as “man that’s a fan” meaning sports fan. So it is real important to ask questions. Another thing I look for is how my questions are responded to. I had a difficult time developing a style that sounded conversational and not like an interrogator when I was asking questions, but I think it is important to develop that style. I will allow two or three letters for her to answer. If she hasn’t then I will ask why she refuses. If she has and acceptable reason, then fine. If she ignores the direct question then I end it.
Just some ideas for the guys that may be beginning.