Hey all. I want to travel to Ukraine in the spring and find a nice Ukrainian girl for myself. Not just a beautiful body and face, but someone I can communicate with. I just don't really like dating girls from Canada, (Too much drama for this nice guy).
I hear that Ukraine girls want that guy they can depend on, and be supportive. And have strong family values. For all of the Ukraine girls I've seen, they're beautiful! I'm a good looking guy myself.
Are there any tips that someone can give me while in Ukraine? I am 25, and come from a Ukrainian background living in Canada, (born here). I'm a very nice guy, and don't go to bars/clubs anymore, and just trying to settle down and find that special someone.
Would the Love Tours or Personal Guides from this website be of use? I want to goto Kiev, Odessa, Kharkiv, Dnipropetrovs'k. I can't speak much Ukrainian, I'm learning. But I'm thinking of going to Kiev first, then getting a flat at Kharaviv, and Odessa as well. The prices for a flat in Kiev are very expensive! I just want to stay for a few months and see what I can do there. The price to get back and forth from Toronto to Kiev is around $1120. Not bad I suppose.
Hey Mike. Welcome to the forum - try not to let the 'wildlife' scare you off.
First off, learn Russian, not Ukrainian. Some of my friends from Mariupol say they consider speaking Ukrainian like we brits consider speaking French! I highly recommend Pimsluer. If you take it seriously, you can get enough of the basics down in a month/six weeks or so.
If you're looking for a lack of drama, Ukraine might not be the best place. Beautiful women, sometimes fiery tempers.
Kiev's probably the best place for your first trip. Easy enough to get around the centre (make sure you stay in the very centre, though. The city's enormous and taxi's can sting foreigners), and most restaurants/cafe's have English speaking staff. There's also a decent proportion of English speaking girls there. Opinion here will vary on wether you should concentrate on English speaking girls, but I'd say it's a good way to get your 'feet wet' so to speak.
Concentrate on girls around your own age. It tends to go that the younger you get, the less serious and the more scammers/gold diggers (not in any way a scientific statement, but a useful rule of thumb when judging the situation you're in).
This site advertises tours, but they don't actually do them. If this is the way you want to start things off, A Foreign Affair are usually highly recommended. A tour might be a good idea if this is your first go and you really want to go to so many cities. They're not cheap, but probably the easiest and safest way to go. Opinion here varies greatly re letter writing & personal travelling vs romance tours. If you want to save money, you can tour WAY cheaper going by yourself and booking apartments instead of hotels (start around $50US) - but you have to be a bit of a brave backpacker! Cheap or easy, your call! :)
Have backups - in any city you go to! "No-show"s happen, and it can be a bit disconcerting if you're suddenly left on your own. Every city has a BUNCH of local agency's. Do some research and get local agency details for each city before you go. If you were to call them and say "I'm Canadian, in the city and looking for a date" they'll have 6 lined up within 30 minutes!
Best advice is to just get your butt over there! Don't be an endless keyboard romeo!
I second Muzzy -- from my observation, Ukrainian women can hold their own in drama competition with women from any country. Each culture has its own customs and tendencies, but I suppose you will find them not so very different from women of the West. But the ways they are different, can be very nice.
In my opinion, women Over There have some of the outlook and habits that women had Over Here (I'm a Yankee myself) a generation or two ago. But the gap is closing fast, and is much less for women up to your age, than it is for women 30+.
"I hear that Ukraine girls ... have strong family values." -- On the average, much more so than I'm used to seeing here in the USA. There seems to be a (sizeable) minority of people in the US who stay strongly connected to parents, siblings, and cousins, whereas in Russia & Ukraine this is very much the norm. Also, women seem more likely to want to have children, and to want to have them at earlier ages than in the US.
I'm more than twice your age, and was never much to look at. It's hard for me to imagine, going to Ukraine as a handsome man in the mid 20s. This can't be bad for you!
I don't have any specific advice for meeting women -- some men here recommend simply chatting girls up on the street, or getting involved in some activity (for example, volunteer work) that will include opportunities to meet people. Another option is domestic social networking sites (like vkontakte.ru) that aren't intended for international dating.
Of course, you can try the international dating sites (like fiance.com), but be aware that a VERY LARGE PERCENTAGE of profiles for women in their 20s are vampires. Sad but true, there's an industry of extracting money from hapless foreign men. You really can meet genuine girls this way, but you must be ready to separate the wheat from the chaff. Because you're young and handsome, you have the option of describing yourself online as a penniless student or some such. This might keep some of the vampires away, and give you a higher percentage of women really interested in you.
Okay, so 3 more suggestions:
1. If you want to spend a long time in Ukraine (which I expect will be a great experience for you), it might work a little better to start with a relatively short visit -- maybe a couple of weeks -- to get a feeling for the place, and then plan a longer second stay.
2. If your heart is open about this, try connecting with women a little older than you are. These days, people seem to take a long time to reach adulthood, and this seems to be just as true Over There as in the West. But in addition to the process of maturation, there is really stark generation shift that separates those in their early 20s from those in their early 30s -- because of timing of the fall of the Soviet system and its consequences, their educational and cultural experiences are more different than most of us foreigners can imagine. So the difference between (for example) a 31-year-old and a 23-year-old in Ukraine is going to be even bigger than you would expect simply due to maturity. And if what you are looking for is some quality we seem to have lost in the West, I think you will have better chances with slightly older women (one guy's opinion).
3. Many in Ukrainian cities still have ties to rural villages. If you can find women who spent their childhood vacations in some little house with no electricity or plumbing -- this is not so rare! -- you may find them refreshingly different from "city girls."
Mike excellent suggestions so far. I'd like to reiterate a bit:
Understand that there is a big difference between ladies less than 30 years and those over. The 20 year old will be very much like 20 year old inyour country...maybe a bit more health conscience but very "westernized".
Also understand that your mere presence as a foreigner will not provide you with any advantage over the local guys except as an oddity.. These girls will have less desire to leave their country than those who are older. Your better bet will be to find a lady who has a child. What are your thoughts in this regard?
Someone mentioned about "either letter writing or the socials". Understand that no one gets married immediately after a social and no one becomes engaged after a social. The social only allows you to meet some ladies live. After that comes the same letter writing, communication using various methods as you two get to know each other. You WILL have to learn to use these methods unless you plan on taling many trips or plan to live there.
Durak:
But you said:
"if what you are looking for is some quality we seem to have lost in the West, I think you will have better chances with slightly older women"
That is why I disagreed. I know multiple quality women under 30 and even under 25.
Mike if you are really serious about this search them PM me and I will steer you to different forums where you can get really great info from experienced folks, including guys who are presently living and working in Ukraine.
This thread is starting to die the typical death as the knuckleheads are beginning to take it over with their bickering.
Baron,
He is only 25! Why steer him to somebody older and with children?
My first requirement was a girl without children. Trying to emigrate with a child makes the process much more complicated, including the probable need to bribe the father. Why complicate things unnecessarily, especially when the guy is just 25?
There are plenty of unmarried or divorced girls under 25 without children who would give their lives to be with a nice guy. No need to complicate the guy's life just because it worked for you. The rainbow has different colors and it is for this guy to decide what color he prefers.
Mike,
Just make a list of what you want and certainly do not want and start searching for the person who matches your list most closely, especially regarding those no-no's that you will never accept.
For me the biggest no-no's were smoking and children, and I did not settle for anything less. I advice you to do the same and do not let anybody to lead you to an outcome that will not allow you to be really happy.
I have made the decision that I do not want a woman with a child. I just don't know why I insist on this. However, the woman I am talking to now from Odessa has a kid. I like her, but I have to make it clear to her that because of her kid, there would be nothing between us. I don't want to use her, or make it look like something, but she would be a good connection.
Most of the girls I am talking to are from Ukraindate.com. Most of them want to meet me, some don't. I've talked to a few 21 year olds that seem like they have their head on their shoulders. They just seem different to me than Canadian girls. Most Canadian girls I talk to act like "You have to be this or that, or interest me in this way to talk to me snobbish" attitude. I feel with the Ukraine girls I talked to right now actually do want to meet and not play games. I'm thinking of saving $3000 and going to Ukraine and taking time off work to meet the woman of my dreams.
You guys always crack me up; combining different postings into one. I was not the one who mentioned an older woman, that was someone different. There are young women in his age group that have a child and therefore no local man will touch them.
They say all is fair in love and war, but I’ve never found that to be the case. Some armies have superior equipment, tactics, weaponry…technology.
Some guys have superior equipment, tactics, weaponry…technology. (Nice phone BTW).
The OP seems to have all of the above in spades. In particular the Ukrainian background. Despite most girls professing to have more desire to date, marry, be seen with foreign…especially western.. men their true heart lies with their own kin. It’s a pretty miserable existence some girls have found themselves in when marrying abroad.
The strong family values is a line that agency girls use to make them seem more desirable. IMO the women in Ukraine are the same as in the west with behavior tendencies based on the age group.
18-28 - let’s party
28-35 – Clock is ticking.
35-45 – Last chance at the last chance saloon.
Assuming the OP will target the 18-28 age group, IMO if you’re looking for a nice girl to have fun with and be intoxicated (As many have before) you shouldn’t have any problem.
If you’re looking to settle down with a view to a long term thing…you’re on shaky ground in Ukraine.
Baron:
Maybe you did not say that older women are better, but you are implying that a woman with a child is more serious/mature than one without children.
I also do not share your statement that: "These girls will have less desire to leave their country than those who are older." On the contrary, youth gives a more adventurous spirit to anybody and makes people more adaptable to a big change, while older people are more set on their ways and have a greater difficulty managing change, especially a complete change in life necessary when moving to a foreign country.
In my experience, these women (any age) will take the risk seriously if the man is serious, faithful, and treats them better than what they are used to. In addition to that, the man has to have his finances in order, because being able to take care of their "family" is very high on the list of the girls who don't want just a fun trip, but want to settle down forever, regardless of age.
Kirkland:
In my experience the clock ticks faster for FSU women. Once I met a gorgeous 26-year old who wanted to marry me and have a child immediately, because, in her words, she was already too old.
Mike:
If you do not want a woman with a child, please do yourself and herself a favor: "stop talking to such women, unless it is only as friends and you have been very clear about never wanting to be more than friends." It is the kindest thing to do. Many women with children will take any chance for a better future for the children.
Mike I'll let you be the judge my "credentials".
I made a serious master plan before I began any correspondence and was serious about being serious and honest about myself and with myself.
I then had excellent correspondence using many modern mediums with many real and serious women.; some with child and some single.
I chose the best woman for me and she did the same and she did have small child.
I flew and met my Russian in Kiev and we decided we were a match and got engaged.
Now we are married and living very happily together.
Many of the other men on this site have taken many many trips, dated tons of women, have gotten scammed by a bunch and even some have married some women but are not now.
I will let you determine who has been more "successful"
And who offers the better advice.
"I hear that Ukraine girls ... have strong family values." -- On the average, much more so than I'm used to seeing here in the USA. There seems to be a (sizeable) minority of people in the US who stay strongly connected to parents, siblings, and cousins, whereas in Russia & Ukraine this is very much the norm."
Perhaps my gf is not the norm. She has strong connections to her parents, siblings, aunts and uncles. She knows about 25 of them. She was quite surprised when I told her I know hundreds of my relatives.
When I went to the Philippines, I met people who would say something like your mother was my uncle's cousin's husband's half sister.
Baron:
Technically speaking, I have been married longer than you. You have not even reached your first anniversary :-) (we both married last year, but I did during Thanksgiving and you on Dec 31st).
Should I then say that I have more credibility than you? Does that make me more "successful" than you?
BTW, I was never scammed, but I did take my time and made many trips. This was too important for me to marry the first girl who made me feel great.
We agree to disagree, but I do it "respectfully." I have not called anybody names. You did when people disagreed with you.
Well guys. I am NOT going for a mommy. I knew a guy at a call center that I worked here and went off to Sheridan College after i gave him advice. Now he has a beautiful Ukraine girlfriend. He is 20 but was born in Ukraine and immigrated to Canada. I guess she came from Ukraine too. Now if I had ties to the Ukraine Community here, I could have good chances. That would be neat!
So I guess I'll have confidence going into Ukraine. I'll actually try to pick up something. Like it will be worth my while. I just have this good vibe. Hey if I get screwed, it's my own fault. I think I just need to go with my basic instincts. I have like 50 women to write to before I go to Ukraine.. A little work, a little planning. The best one I will have to meet from the bunch.