I am a 39 year old single father of 1 beautiful little girl, I have a little experience dealing with agencies and thebride thing in general, after reviewing the site and reading the posts I hope I have something to offer the guys out there to help with some of their questions.
I guess the biggest thing for me when I first started was I was in the to good to be true catagory. I mean look at these women, like id have a chance, yeah rite ! To all you guys out there reading this, Im not saying this is the way to go for everyone but it made the world of difference for me. First the (she's to goodlooking attitude must go !) Now you must be realistic, if your 40 something and shes 19 or 20 well then you are probably correct. Often you see a woman state her
requirements for age as say 25 to 50 and shes 19 ! No matter how flattering that may seem be real what do you think ! Before we go any further you must also remember that for the most part(there arre scammers)these are living breathing women with the same fears/hope and feelings you have, treat them that way. Which brings me to my next point. being prepared. Before you write and start something you cant finish be practical, air fare to and from Russia is not a small matter, and you will require that twice. Money while your over there.
again you want to MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION not IMPRESS HER ! But again a good amount of money (gifts for her her family members and so on) now add in the charges for the agency monthly or per email or membership fees addresses and so on. But wait your not done yet ! During your letter writing phase you are bound to hit a birthday, special occasion,Russian Holiday, now how can you ignore an important date after telling her for months how important she is to you ! again
gift/card/or flower. Now come the phone calls (hopefully she speaks english) another bill. But congrats youve made it this far, your in love ! now the dreaded visa for her to come over and get married. if you think you can do this on your own and be married before the turn of the next century guess again ! Another bill ! Get a lawyer that specializes in this it is so much easier. And if the girl you fall for is blessed with children, then the bill just got bigger. Please dont think I am trying to discourage you because im not ! But I know I didnt think of these things when i first started either, just make sure you have a little nest egg before you get to involved it will save you both alot of grief. Also I saw some posts where someone said about not wanting to ask the wrong or inappropriate questions. Within your second or third letter it is a good idea to explain your reservations to the girl. Simply tell her that building a relationship
from so far away, between two different cultures is not going to be an easy task, further explain that because this chance at happiness is so important to you you may from time to time have questions or ask for an explination from her about something, apologize in advance
incase any of your questions may make her feel uncomfortable, the reassure her that you will do your best to understand and learn as much as you can to help the relationship go smoothly. You should then have no problem with a tasteful question. Im not sure how long these posts can be so Ill start a new one for the next topic.
I am very glad to see that I am not the only person here who writes the responses. You experience is very much appreciated here!Positive or negative-other guys will need it to make thier own decisions or think about the way they choose.So you are always welcome!
Thank you for those words of wisdom RE39.
They were a bit of a wake up call for me :-)
I just sent my 1st free letter today. And to be honest, hadn't really taken the long view (financially that is).
However, having said that, I will see what happens.
I'm a firm believer in "if it's meant to be, it will be".
But then you could call me a hopeless dreamer too :-)
Magicone, Most women in Russia are not looking for richness but stability. I donít know about New Zealand, but in the US the men actually have to submit a financial statement to prove their stability and that they are able to support their new Russian bride. This proof is provided to the interviewer for the visa in Russia before the visa is issued. The sponsor provides it to his bride to be to bring it with her to her interviewer. I would assume so that the interviewer would be able to see what her impression is of what she is getting into. If she knows he is middle class and she acts like he is middle class then it shows she knows him to some degree. But if he is middle class and she walks into her interview acting like she has a rich man then it shows she really doesnít know him. But as I have said I donít know what New Zealand does. I think you will find most women in Russia are reasonable. It is an expensive way to meet and marry a woman, but the investment is well worth it. The average male involved here is from middle to upper middle class. the average coast when all is said and done can be from $10.000 to $15.000 (US) thatís it you hit all the holidays and also make a few trips. If you think your going to get off with $2.000 to $5.000 (US) your fooling yourself. Itís a long process and itís costly. But itís worth it.