I'm not new to the dating game but I'm new to this site thus I'm looking for some feedback whilst posting some of my own. My greetings to 'Thunderdome', we know each other from another life.
Is there any form of 'quality control' on this site, what happens if you come across a dishonorable lady, is there a reporting procedure?
What happened to the 'online chat with ladies' that one pays for when subscribing, I can't find it, does it exist?
What are the estimated percentage of dishorable ladies/scammers on this site? I note there are fewer ladies from Lugansk than on other sites but for a long time, the
'loo-gangsters' have been declaring they are from villages & towns in the Lugansk region rather than Lugansk itself, more recently I've observed they claim to be from different cities entirely, are they here on this site?
Why do the ladies seemingly insist on replying online via this site rather than directly to the email address you have provided them with? Do the ladies or agencies sign a bond whereas they will continue to write via this site so the guys need to renew their subscription? The site advertises that you can send unsolicited emails including your address, fat lot of use it seems to do if the ladies are sworn to reply online!
Something I do like are the receipts you get when the lady reads and sends. Yesterday, a lady took 1 minute and 50 seconds from the time she read my letter to the time she sent her reply. She obviously thought long and hard before deciding to send me her canned letter, that's indeed if it was the lady, not an agency, sending her canned letter!
What does concern me, should things work out with a lady then to apply for her visa the consulate are going to want to see communications between the two of you. With emails it is not a problem, all emails have a time, date and from who to who on them, this online letter business bears no such proof.
Another concern with these online letters, the other day I detected a scammer claiming to be from Kharkov, all it took was to select her email's 'full header' to realise she was actually from Lugansk. There's no such detection method here.
Anyway, just my thoughts but on the whole, it seems a pretty good site.
Martin_UK, welcome to our forum!:)
About the speed of typing...hey if the letter is not that big, I could type it in 1 minute:))) I learned how to type really fast through my studying and work:)) So don't forget the speed of typing:)
Martin_UK. all your questions are very well discussed in this forum. use search. I am sure some members will explain you more again.
when you are premium/vip member you send letters to anybody unlimited. Ladies are not sworn to answer via site. if they have their private emails they usually provide their own email. fiance.com admins do not read any letters. Agencies will use site, and must use it.
site has 24X7 customer service, so report what ever you think is needing admin's attention. or ask any help. You can chat with ladies via messaging. real time chat is not on yet.
you have all tools to determine who is honest who is not. this site do not charge you per letter, to open a letter you do not need to pay anything you need to be premium, or vip member. also if you are VIP member you see girls' stat when their registered, and how many letters have been sent to them. read letters. if you see it is canned letter , do not continue, or continue. it is your choice. report if you feel lady is not honest. ladies the same as you can login to the site from web interface, so there is no EMAIL headers. all email comes from fiance.com server. again, welcome to the forum.
yes there are (loo-gangsters) here. they usually give you their private e-mail adress immediately without you asking in the first reply through their agency. i
also have noticed that they are using other cities also. you have a good eye. there are a couple of good looking blonde anastasyias with almost identical private e-mail adresses that i think are up to something. their e-mail adresses have a sexual connatation in them like (loveyouonly.com)
Welcome Martin, you have ask some good questions. The scammers are here as well so do beware but the biggest scam so far is some of the agencies send canned or fake letters to get your correspondence as they do get paid by the letter from fiance.com. They are pretty easy to see after a few letters. There is time based info in your inbox you can choose to view all trasactions and you get time stamps via that menu. Chat is very misleading there is none. Letters and this forum are it. They say they are working on it but it could have been done many times over by now. Over all I still think the service is a value. There is room for improvement and many things they could do to clean up the database but again there seem to be some real girls here. The rest are infomercials for their agencies and there special services. My best estimate would be 1/4 real and current and the rest fluff. I know it has very little basis but that is based on my 700-800 letter experience. As far as quality control we are it. They pretty much only act by our request so feel free to let them know if you have any problems.
Thanks Shaggy and others,
One thing that was pleasing, I received a couple of very ladylike replies to the effect 'thank you for your attention but please look for another lady'. I know all about the FSU culture but it is a long time since I've met such politeness on the internet!
Yep, I guess the scammers must be here as everywhere but like everywhere, if you're searching in the under 25, drop dead gorgeous category then you're at high risk with a decreasing risk the older the age and the lesser the looks.
Anyway, I'm in Ukraine 18 December until 03 January thus still hunting!
700-800...!!! Don't you sleep? Cut the writing and get on a plane, whydontcha...? :-)) Spare the ladies the torment of having to reply to your prolific output. :-))
The agencies I went to were fairly unanimous, the women hated sending letters. Why? Because they know most men don't visit. Usually after 3 or 4 letters, men decide who they want to focus on and the other ladies are dropped I suspect without even a fond farewell.
I don't have any problem with canned letters. It's just common sense. If an attractive lady receives letters from 30 or men in the first month, that's a hell of a lot of typing for them and it's hard work. Printing them out, sitting at home when they have little free time, ploughing through the dictionaries, then composing a reply. It takes work!
I just say, after the 2nd or 3rd..'It would be nice to receive a more personal letter next time' OR as you say, the cream rises to the top anyway... you soon discover who is sincere and interested, the tone of the letters changes.
'never ever send any money to anyone for anything ever' You ARE joking, of course. Aren't you?
If a lady is paying $1-$2 a time in a cyber cafe to write to you and is on a subsistence income, as most of them are, it is perfectly reasonable to help out.
Not everyone is scamming. It's paranoia to think so. Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater and offend a lady or miss out on 'THE ONE!!! by implying you do not trust them. Some of these ladies are not desperate and will be assessing you as much as you are assessing them. Since they don't get shown it a lot, many ladies are looking to be treated with respect. It's amazing how they respond when you do.
QC don't be quite so litteral. You did notice the lol after that statement. Though I have yet to have any of the real women on this site ask me for a dime. Even for correspondence. If your lady is at an agency then your monthly fees should cover the return letter to you. Plus realize that they are writing to more than you on that dime. You are correct that canned letters can be ok but if there is not any personal response then you should move on. I was very clear that not all were scammers only the majority were scammers, fake or old listings. As far as letters I was a little carried away the first couple weeks not quite sure why I did not get many responses...lol..then I got an tidal wave of letters...I learned my lesson but yes I wrote every one of those letters myself. Everyone personalized for the person who wrote me. Yes it takes time but I feel I owe it to them to answer them on an individual basis. Still hoping to fly out on the 29th.
Good Morning! ("Afternoon" to the Brits!)
I have to agree with QC; "it is perfectly reasonable to help out". My time in Russia has been spent mostly in the "smaller" cities. I have a friend in Togliatti (800,000), who is an accountant for a sizable company. She makes the equivalent of $45 per month. And the internet cafe, indeed costs $1 an hour.
Shaggy, I saw the LOL. But if there are inexperienced people reading, I would hate for them to think that sending $5-10 or even $20 to a woman was a complete no-no. And, I agree with you, "the real women. . .[won't] ask [you] for a dime." But there is nothing wrong with "one" volunteering to "help out" the person he is communicating with.
BTW: I'm new to this site (first post), but I have taken the "short" trip. 5 times to Russia; once to Minsk (Belarus)
Sending $5-10 is a waste of time, I think, since Western Union screws you royally on the charges. It costs the same to send $40 as it does $20. I hedged my bets, since we are writing often, and sent $30
Since the dollar is belly up at the moment the costs are not SO bad for me. God bless Americaaaaaa!!!
You know you can get a penpal for a few dollars. You can buy membership to this site, write to a few ladies, get the email address of one or two and then write to her till one or both of you get sick of it.
What will you be out? Maybe $30?
But most of us are here to find wives. And I firmly beleive that the best and ONLY way to do that is to get on a plane and go, preferably on a tour with Socials.
The three most incredible women Russian women that I have met so far (two from Moldova, one from Latvia) are not letter writers. One has an email address but writes very little and very reluctantly. The other two have never even had enough experience on a computer to use the internet.
Trust me; at a Social you won't have a guy showing up claiming to BE a woman (well...not that I KNOW of anyway....).
Is it expensive? Yeah. Its going to cost a few thousand. But if you do anything beyond getting a penpal and are serious about finding a wife - you're going to pay thousands eventually. This is not an economy endeavor.
I hope that things work out with my fiance. But if they don't I'll be back on a Romance Tour soon again.
Yes Jet I agree with you that everyone must make the trip but as far as the socials I can understand that some people will do better with some prior knowledge of the women. Yes it is a hastle and I agree many have stated in their letters they would rather meet in person. I just think that writing gives you a chance to experience much of what to expect when I get there. I know that there will be allot that is not covered in writing as well as other issues. I though am just the type that I do not do as well with strangers as someone I have at least some knowledge of.
I have read much that the socials are very similar to here. That there are many escorts and others that go only for the prospect of business and gifts as well as the free food and drinks. Many will want to take you on tours that they will get kick backs from as well as restaurants and other attractions. I guess as others have said that it is harder for them to try their scamms once they know you but I still think there is the same dangers in the socials that are here. I think that I will attend one at some time just to experience it but I guess at this time I am not counting on it as the only source. Again I have made many real friends with writing and I think it will help me once I am there to have them to help out and further my networking.
You are correct though that there are many that will never be discovered without a visit.
I also think that people should understand that there will be many trips most likely before success. Bottom line is I don't feel that one is any better than the other. I think both are required for success just depends on the two to figure how much...lol
NEVER send any money to any woman you have not met personally AND established a real timeserious relationship.
"Helping out" is not your responsibility.
Doing it foments the wrongful concept of financial dependency, thus creating the very thing we are trying to avoid...scammers.
QC and I represent two diametrically opposed points of view on this topic. I hope both help you.
Men in this and other forums have been complaining their FSU honies are scammers simply because they get dumped when the lady choses someone else and stops corresponding with the fools who send money for whatever reason....as if accepting their easily earned dollars or pounds meant they are under some form of contract of exclusivety. Such nonsense!
Take all the time you need to correspond, talk on the phone, exchange gifts, visit and vacation together as ways to develop a friendship and relationship WITHOUT creating financial dependency.
And keep in mind that you and your lady are not obligated to any exclusivity to each other until and unless you decide you belong in each other's lives for something more than friendship.
How in the world can you even imagine something like that happening BEFORE you meet in person at least a few times?