If there are any FSU ladies reading this, I wonder what is considered a normal time between meeting someone and getting married?
In the west there are a range of possibilities. Some men go to Russia, fast-track 'love', and get married after 5 days!! Others take their time and it could be 1.5 years or even longer.
Are Russian women generally impatient to be married? Are they confident they know enough about men to decide early on... OR... would Russian women prefer to take their time and get to know someone thoroughly?
(I realise the woman who marries the guy after 5 days is clearly okay with it!... but this is not the norm)
it was 6 months before me and my lady decided to tie the knot. I proposed to her at the very end of our second meeting. We have spent close to 2 months together in the 9 months since we met. In our case she knew just about everything about me before I asked her. I know I wanted to know her well before I even chose to pop the question
sorry QC I know you want ladies comments but i wanted to add my 2 cents =P
hi guys, a very interesting question, as i thought that sometimes men are impatient too :)... of course you cant say about all russian women: they want to get marry as quick as possible... it depends on the person of course... as for me, well, i think that it is important to get to know the man you are going to marry very well, before making such a serious step...my granny was saying: think 100 times before getting married, as it is a very important even in your life; of course old people in the past thought that we get married once, the time has changed :)but i agree with her people meet, get married, apart, get divorced...i dont want that in my life...i want quiet life with the man of my life...and of course white dress on wedding is very important!!!:)
...but anyway it is an indiviadual way for everyone...
Do you really want to get married or looking for some excuses not to do it.
Meeting with Russian woman over internet is rather special. They expect that you either sex tourist or really serious person who is looking for a wife.
Sex tourist means that you want to fell in love, have a grate affair and amazing lust. May be some women (and may be me) also want the same. It is not easy to take someone in your real life then you are adult. It is possible to satisfy your needs with a surrogate relationships that goes to nothing. And how gallant the American men! You feel their care and attention all the time.
I think that some letters and several days is really enough to understand if that person suit you or not. Two months is the maximum period of time. Then it goes to marasmum. Woman stops trust the person. She get father and father from him. And possibility that your marriage would be successful diminish dramatically. She feels uncertainty and offence. It is hard to construct a marriage on the basis of this feelings.
I consider that normal time between meeting someone and getting married is maximun several months.
Thank you solnishko and bagira. It is refreshing to hear that you consider American men to be gallant. I can see a few chests in this forum being thrust forward and... my, oh my... I do believe some of the men are an inch taller after reading this!! lol
How much more so an educated British man. I can assure you, they also, are gallant. ;-)
I wonder how much the ladies ages may factor into your question.
Younger women (18-25) who never married have all the time in the world to choose wisely before marrying, but their youth and impatient may cause them to want a quick marriage.
Women in their 30s (my favorite) with a divorce and/or child(ren) in their basket may be wiser to the pitfalls of quick marriages, but also impatient to find a good man to rebuild a stable family setting before father time robs her of her physical appeal.
Yes it is a hard question. Here in the west a marriage after 2 months many would laugh and say you were going to fast. I think that many of us married before think that 6 months would be about a minimum. The truth is we all throw our best wisdom to the wind when our hearts are truly touched. It is so hard to say. I truly appreciate the ladies coming out and talking to us about it. If only we could get more direct input from them I think we could do much to stop so much of the misconceptions and false ideas. We have many agencies meaning well but with what we now know about the mistakes in translations and the coaching going on to both sides it becomes so hard to seperate the facts from the fiction. Again thanks so much ladies!
It all depends. For example my parents knew they would marry after 6 months of dating, but actually got married 3 years later.
For now on, my boyfriend and I are dating for almost 4 years and almost 1 year living together, we already think about us like about a family, but we don't hurry to make a ceremony, as personally we don't need it. This will be family and friends who will need it, so we don't hurry with it;)
Of course one may give lots and lots of examples, but may be not good in the situation when 2 people are frome 2 different countries. If my memory suits me well, my friend got married with her husband (American) after 1 year of dating, but during this year they already were doing documents and things like that!
True love has no time frame or limitations. The only requirement is honesty and deliver on what you promise. I do not promise women many things in life. I will only promise mine two things, one that I will love her for the rest of her life and the second is her bed will be the only one I will ever sleep in. After that I will try to give her the best life possible. Keep it simple, love is complicated enough and time frames just add to the difficulty. When it happens you will know.
I am neither gallant or a coward, I am not weak or strong, but my lady in Ukraine understands that she is the main focus in my life and she has told me it is an awesome feeling just to be that important in a mans life. I guess what women take for granted in the states is a cherished gift in another land.
all of you mask with pretty words your fear of true intimacy. Instead it is a business transaction, sex for money. I have met many of these russian women and they have always been manipulative greedy decitful women. The men, desperate, demanding of submissive women and silly enough to believe the well done acting of the russian women.
I see a lot of questions on Russian women. Why does anyone think they are any different than any other women? They are individuals, and everyone's situation or circumstance would be different. So, go by your own situation and circumstance. If she wants to get married soon, don't go by the advice that tells you to wait for x number of months before proposing.
In some reason men in this board seem to think russian (slavic?) women are like marsians or something. I understand russian soul is complicated but not THAT complicated!
Women been manipulative...isnt that so femine...men look for femine women from the east...isnt that their goal, why complain?
Sorry QC but its very unypical posts of yours...old too, I am sure you know the answer now:)
I'm interested in what the ladies think of prenuptual agreements. In America the divorce rate is 50%, even among those couples who truly marry for love. And while we American men desperately wish to believe the FSU women will marry us in good faith (whatever their motivation), the fact is that they could divorce us in two years (or whatever the time is to get USA citizenship) and then sue for half the husband's financial assets, and likely win. The man is quite vulnerable in this way, and I've learned that I cannot always tell when a man or woman is truly sincere. I've also learned that a person may be ethical and fair so long as they love you, but if they fall out of love with you then it becomes all about the money!
From my experience, Russian women/girls who are looking to move to the West are very manipulative, clued-up and deceitful - they will put on an act quite convincingly for a year or two and after guys, be prepared for the worse - my advice is - steer well clear of them.
sounds just like american women. only difference is it does take a couple years for them to assimilate before they drop the bomb. in the mean time you have the most loving and affectionate person, she not realizing american women turn off the switch after only a few months. give me a break already. this is old stuff. yet still it is something to think about. that is why so many are so careful. in the end, no matter how long it takes, how careful you are or how positive you are about the woman it is still a gamble. and that is true no matter where you live, who you are with and whether she is from a different country or not.
women are women. even notomorrow understands this.