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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > The Fathers and visitation Rights. Author Post ONEKINDMAN Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 3:34:51 AM   You know we talked about Women with childern and I got lots of insight on that topic. But As I look around and see lots of Divorced womens profiles I couldnt Help wonder about the kids Father,I have read alot of storys ABOUT THE MEN. But Never about Visitation rights for the father or about custody and if there would be in some cases a long court battle to bring the child to the United States? Or do the fathers Pay any Support or Alimoney? LOL I can all ready hear Toad :) I am working on my next Topic It is going to be the best Quotes from all you Regulars and Everyone has to guess who said that :) Example: A clever man knows how to take care of his family. Do you know who said that? GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 4:00:50 AM   ONE, This pretty much summarizes your question:...There is no child custody/support legislation in place in most FSU countries and whatever little you can find, is not enforced. In other words, a single or divorced mother does not have any hope of being able to rely on her child's father for financial assistance should he decide to split. He does have, however, paternal rights that makes it pretty hard for a single mother to consider moving abroad unless he signs a paternal release and surrenders all legal custody claims to the child. toad Ditto Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 8:12:49 AM   One, this is where I started my search. I knew I wanted to meet a woman with a young son, but I told each of the ones I became more intentional with that if there would be a problem with the father giving permission for the son to move abroad, that we might as well end it right away. I was not going to pay a ransom for the father's permission and I would not make visitation concessions that would be financially prohibitive. ONEKINDMAN Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 9:20:01 AM   I can Imagine that in the Human mind of Some X Husbands that one way to get back at her is never allow the child or her a better life. Situations could Develop that could turn into the Hardest things you might ever have face. When things are out of your control and you have used your last resource and the pain of something like that happening could be so hard to ever get over. The Life Experience that Lingers in this very forum The words that are etched on these walls are by far some of the best readings I have read in my life. ONEKINDMAN Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 9:25:54 AM   Situations could Develop that could turn into the Hardest things you might ever have to face. (Wow my wording and my spelling Just suck :) Dale E Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 12:41:19 PM   OKM- If you read back in the old posts, you will find plenty of information and opinions on this subject. New people should do this just because it is a pain in the ass and I did it myself! :o) ONEKINDMAN Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 5:10:22 PM   Believe me Brother I read plenty of Post, I did not see that one or Havent got to that one yet, I will Look today and read that") I have read till my ass is red and could of Missed that one Also by bringing up old subjects and re-visiting them it gives People that do come to this forum in the future a couple of places for reference. It also gives new regulars who didnt answer On the old pages an opportunity To voice there opinion. Theres subjects that are so many pages down that could be re-visited Its not even funny. I think IZ Said it best The things we all talk about have been topics somewhere in here before. It makes old things alive and Interesting to some and makes it old and boring to others. GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 5:49:01 PM   It was probably one of most difficult choices to make for me: Childless woman vs. Woman with child (not children) At the begining on my search I thought the ideal would be to find a built-in family of a woman with one boy. I have three great kids with whom I have a great parent child-relationship. And although I decisively believe that my life is better lived under a roof with children, I had self doubts about being able or willing to jump back into the 'child raising from scratch' cooking pot with the same level of passion and eagerness a childless woman like Lena most definitely would bring to our new family. Unbalanced elements, at best... My experience, knowledge and proven track record as a single papa combined with her passion, eagerness and energy finally won out. Unlike moi, Lena has a wise way of making her point with one liners on many serious subjects. "..I feel a lot safer planning a family with a man who has seen his three children be born and did not require medical attention while it was happening..." or "...With parents like us our children will never have a chance to get away with anything that is not good for them.." The alternative was to form a new family with TWO people who have to adapt not just to a new country and lifestyle but to my other children as well. The FSU paternal rights is a HUGE factor and like Ditto mentioned above should be considered most important and dealt with long before you even begin to think about meeting them. DO NOT bury this issue under the rug..!! I do not envy those of you who do not have previous direct first hand parental experience and are bringing an FSU woman with child(ren). You may very well end up being 100 times better parent that I ever was, am or will be....but at least now I know exactly what to expect at each turn of the road and it will not blindsight me like it did so many times before. toad aussieman41 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 11:08:58 PM   Toad is right. An single FSU women with a kid is a very difficult issue an problem to deal with. Paternal rights of the biological father...legal notarised permission is required of the father before an FSU women will be allowed to take her kid out of the FSU to go to the West. Make no mistake....an FSU women will not abandon her kid if she can not get the permisison for it to leave the FSU from its father. Toad, I am a divorced father of 3 kids also. I have heard off cases where a Western man has had to pay $2000USD bribe to an FSU womens kids biological father to get the legal permission from him to allow the kid to leave the FSU...I have also heard of cases where the father does not give the permission in order to stop his ex-wife having a future in the West ( vengeful, vindicative behaviour ). I will tell you a true story. Last year, an acquataince of mine, Peter from Australia went to Ekaterinburg to meet a woman named "Lena" who has a 15 year old daughter and stayed with her 2 months. When he came back to Australia, he found he had to change jobs because the minimum income requirement to sponsor an FSU women with a kid on a Fiance Visa was $45,000 PER YEAR and he fell short of that so he retrained as a Prison Officer (Guard) and now works on the nightshift. Lena came to Australia without her daughter..she did not want to come even though a visa had been granted to her..THE WHOLE PROCESS FROM START TO FINISH TOOK 12 MONTHS. It turned out, that Lena's daughter did not want to come to Australia because she wanted to take over ownership of her mothers flat in Ekaterinburg so it it all came down to property and money. Lena was upset but she remains here with her husband. Her daughters visa validity expired and it will be difficult for another to be obtained but the girl wants to remain in Ekaterinburg in her mothers flat while her mother sends money overseas to support her. This is an example of the type of problems you get when you become involved with an FSU women that has a kid. I agree with Toad..don't get involved with a Single FSU mother..you are opening a can of worms..going to have lots of problems and expense with this. Most of the women in internet marriage agencies do not have the legal permission to take there kid out of the FSU..they do not think of these legal matters when they register with the agencies. Do not rely on promises they can get the legal permission..promises are just words..you need to see it in black and white ( in legal writing ) first! I think a personal visit to a Single FSU mother is a waste of time and money unless, you as the man sight the legal permisison and document for the kid to leave the FSU first. If you don't sight it before you travel you are either setting yourself up for a failure or your trip will be a lot dearer than you think..bribes will have to paid to the father and lawyers to get things moving!!!! ONEKINDMAN Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/29/2005 11:46:39 PM   Toad/ Aussie, Dam good post. I am Speechless and that does not happen very often. My Mouth goes like a ducks ass in a wind strom:) Thanks for sharing your guys input. GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/30/2005 1:01:48 PM   Aussie...I did not in any way, shape or form say, meant or intended my position to be one of discouragement for men dating FSU women with kids. I made my choice and I changed my mind MAINLY because Lena is the best women I found, not because she is childless. But women with children does present a challenge that needs to be addressed, discussed openly and budgeted realistically... I know men in California married to their FSU women who came with teenage child(ren) and have one very happy family life that they feel grateful for every day. toad aussieman41 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/31/2005 3:10:10 AM   To be corrected "Toad did not make any statement, discouraging men from FSU girls that have kids from other relationship(s). He is right, however that FSU women with kids are a greater challenge. Things can work out with these girls but it will not be mostly smooth sailing. The FSU father of the kid is a real complication and unknown quantity. Going to the FSU is an unknown quantity itself without having any further unknown quantities such as ex-husbands of your internet bride to be lurking in the background, ready to through a spanner into the works. You really have to be careful with FSU girls with kids..ask questions of them..be sure you know what you are doing and what you are getting involved with and be prepared for immigration difficulties and hiccups..chances are it will happen and chances are it will not. Just be careful and think about this!! Ditto Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/31/2005 8:53:01 AM   I was fortunate with my fiancee. Her husband was unemployed throughout their time together and drove a MB 300 SEL. When her son was about 10 months old, she kicked him out. When her son was about 2 years old, the father disappeared. No one has heard from him since. I think he wound up in the trunk of his own car. She already had the courts declare him missing and her as sole custodian. There will be no hiccups. We're expecting notification of the interview date any day now. ONEKINDMAN Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 5/31/2005 2:54:58 PM   Very best of luck to you Ditto :) SoccerDad Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 6/10/2005 4:06:08 PM   So, how much extra money does it cost when the woman has a child? Most of the ladies that have decent looks 30 or older have at least one child and are divorced. Thunderdome Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 6/10/2005 4:21:32 PM   In Ditto's case not much, a second ticket plus raising it until it'll leave the nest ;-) But related complications are various, from simply eventually (the expensive bit!) finding out he will not grant permission or you having to bribe him, with permutations like regular visits back to a court declaring him missing. This can be a complictaed issue SD, and especially here you should do proper homework - in advance! izifaddag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 6/10/2005 6:31:11 PM   I like this subject because it directly affects me. I actively look for women with a child. Just one. That is enough I think. I would sooner concentrate my efforts on one child. If the lady has a 21 year old (and let us face it that happens all the time) it isn't so important. That kid is an adult. I look deliberately for a lady with a boy between 5 and 10 years old. I also accpt girls but I look for the ones with boys. The very first thing tha I establish is that they are still friends with the father and he is willing to sign away the kid to live overseas, permanently. No visitation, nada. Unlike Ditto I am wiling to pay a ransom for the right woman. Just one time and for the right ammount. No signature I move on. Sometimes it can be difficult getting a straight answer. That want you to become emotionally attached so they can embroil you in the legal struggle to disentangle fronm the ex husband. I am not up for that. A straigh forward signature or a bribe and that is that. They often, especially Ukrainian women, think that a divorce decree and custody gives the carte blanche to do what they like with the kid. Not so. I am not sure if it is the American or FSU authorities who are tight asses about this. I a, thinking I read somewhere it is both. I am not sure. Anybody know for certain? And precisely what document do you need signed? I must say that I have several women that I talk to that are on good terms with their ex husbands and there would be no problem signing so I don't want to imply that they are all bastards. It isn't true. wmferg Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 6/10/2005 7:00:38 PM   Izi, it is the US consulate that requires the release from the father. I know of no requirement for the child to receive an internatonal passport, only for the US visa. This is only in regards to Ukraine, I am not sure about the other FSU countries. Bill izifaddag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 6/10/2005 8:00:30 PM   Thanks Bill it is probably the same but I want to find out. SoccerDad Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 6/11/2005 12:15:48 AM   Can the lady have the document signed up front. That is, can she have the document signed before she solidifies the marriage and early in the email exchanges? If she can and can provide a copy to you that might ease a lot of fears. Do these documents appear online anywhere? If so what is the url? Your Reply: Your name:   New Registration Password:   Forgot password?   refresh Code:   Russian brides > Main Forum > The Fathers and visitation Rights.
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