wene you talk to a womem and you like her and you want to meet her, how das it work??????????????? and is it easy to get a girl ? and do they want to love you or jus want to leave there country? i dunno , help me out here
Dear michell, most of the women are sincerelly looking for serious relationship/marriage not just mooving to another country. read this forum, there are a lot helpfull guys and advices how to start corresponding, what to/not to write in your ad, how to determine if she is sincere, read anti scam advices. don't send money to any girl whom you never met in person! most of ladies from FSU do expect men to visit them in their home country. so when you find lady you probably will be interested to go and meet her in FSU. so read tips about traveling as well. welcome to the forum!
I agree with Nadya BUT the devil is in the details.
Do not think that RU women are not petulant, scruffy, argumentative or anything else that is negative not just with women but men also.
The thing that is correct is the motivation, much more so than with western women. However finding one who is actually marriageble is another story.
Toad went through over 400 women. I am trying to catch him up :))
It is difficult Michell. Also expensive.
It is, for example, very advisable to send flowers and have a picture taken. Hopefully a candid one. Then you will see what she really looks like. Unfortunately that is going to cost about $40 to $50 a pop. It adds up my friend.
Then there is the inevitable visit(s). Some will fall flat, leaving a hole in your pocket. I still think it is worth trying. I am not ready to quit yet. I am getting there though:))
Welcome to the wonderful world of International Dating
First off nothing is easy in this Quest to find true Love...
2. you better have A The Stomach to take the good with the bad
and there are plenty of up's and Downs.
3. The want to love you or just wanna Leave there country
Depends on who your talking with, Not every girl wants to leave
or Intends to leave with the first guy that goes to visit her.......
Love is A funny thing with Long Distance Relationships, Here today
gone tomorrow Does that ring A bell?
4.Hope you have money and I am not speaking for everyone
when I say this, or Am I am speaking about Gold digging
What I mean is Trips. Food. Visa. Etc Etc Etc Etc.....The Etc part depend on her and you....
5. If you really want to Learn and Learn the ropes
Here is the best place to start, My Opinion of course
I have Started my Quest since April and I have logged
in A fair Guess close to 300 hours of reading. writing.
Planning. And I admitted I wasent even ready to go then
But I am Now........
6.If you take all the above and Questions from others in this forum what it takes then add it all up and then ask yourself do I and I mean you.. Do you have what it takes and if you do then have one hell of A good time.
As you say, 'your opinion'. I have a different slant.
It can be easy or difficult. Depends on your motivation, tolerance, degree of stupidity and the people you meet along the way.
There doesn't have to be downs. Haven't had any myself. Of course there can be hurdles. However, some people complain bitterly at the first little hiccup, while others take the same 'problems' serenely in their stride.
No, you don't need a lot of money either. You travel within your means. People backpack in many of these countries, it's no big deal, especially if you make useful local contacts.
There is no need to write to 300+ women. I find this 'scattergun' approach a bit disingenuous to the women, who have to deal with this avalanche of mail and may not have the time or money and come to hate the keyboard romantics, who will never get on a flight. Ever!
If you want to learn the ropes, I like what one Russian lady said..
'Run away from the forum. Go by you own independent way. Listen to your Inner Voice and then you win'
If I had to give any advice it would be to not waste too much time in here building up a head of steam. Just get over there and have confidence in yourself.
I am not sure anymore that the difficulties are any different than the ones we encounter in the US with domestic women. I do realize there are cultural bridges,customs and traditions that are dissimiliar to our native women. The ideas of family are different perhaps. But obviously if any of you have followed these threads for a few months,you will come to know that women are very similiar in any sense of the word no matter where they are from. For example,women who have a dimestore budget but a Bloomingdale attitude when they move to America. I met one of these in Chicago who actually sneered at me-shaking her head because I said that money was only a necessity for the sake of creature and home comforts,not a license for excess and lavish,wasteful spending. She thought that it was better to buy a 5000 dollar jacket made of fur rather then a 100 dollar Columbia Sportswear parka for those windy winter nights. My friend from Kirovohgrad and me have dissipated in friendship equivalent to her education in AMerican mannerisms and selfishness. I agree now with QC--immersion learning is probably the best. I theorize that it is probably better to know the place before the woman,and if you are not too anchored into staying home,meeting women impromptu as a bachelor with no illusions and some time to burn may be the best way to go about this endeavor. I am a little confused about internet correspondence now. I am like Izi-wondering if there is a better way to go about this
HI Mitchell ,
Hello all , I do think you have to sit down and ask yourself some questions mitchell ,, and they can be the same as for when you meet a girl in your own country as well as here .
What do i want , do i want longterm marriage , do i want a family , do i want to spend money to find the one thing we are all trying to get ,,, happiness . , am i prepared to put in time and efort to find the one i seek . am i prepared to meet her in her own country and go through the red tape of a fiance visa , if so then read on ,,,,,
What does a girl want , you have to look at this from her point of view and see if you can meet them and if it is worth while , a girl wants to be happy and with one man in her life , she wants to make a home and to have a family with a loving man , husband , father and lover all rolled into one . all women want this , she wants to be the centre of his attention and not just in the bedroom . she wants a man to be a leader of the family and to make her feel she is wanted , she wants him to be a friend and to be there for her ,to encourage her and to keep building your relationship with one another , to enjoy each others life and spend time together doing the things both of you enjoy ,there was a slogan here a while back which read , a puppy is not for christmas , but for life !!! , what do you think a woman is for ,?????? .
If you are not prepared for a longterm relationship , what are you doing here ? If you are , then you must be the kind of man they are seeking and want ,
Are you prepared to give up your freedom , totally , they do not want a man that is always down the local with his mates , they do not want a man that says she is the one for him but glances at every other woman that walks past , they do not want a man that is always thinking of himself , and they do not want a man that has only one thing on his mind ,,,SEX . What woman wants a man like this .
You will find a woman that likes spending , some will like puting something away for a rainy day , and in this sense you will find these types of women here where you live , the area where they are different is that the genuine ones are looking for the one man they could spend there life with and make him happy and get the same in return to build a family based on loyalty trust sincerity kindness generous and respect , i will ask you ,dont we all want this deep down , i do , . oh and mitchell , these women were brought up with conservitive values in other words , they are looking for one man and one marriage , when they commit it is for life , you will have to meet them right down the middle , and mitchell , all i can say is they are very loving .
So mitchell let us asume you have found a girl you like and are serious about and would like to meet , first of all , check her out on some of the scamming sites , she may be genuine , but then again she might not , anti-scammers.org and russian detective .com are two of the best but you might find some from her own city on the web , if she is there then you will have saved yourself a packet not to mention heartache , if she is not then you will have to play it by ear and nadya is right , generally until you meet and see if things go well , do not send a penny , no matter how sad her loving eyes are . and what her reasons are . a genuine girl will want to meet you in there own country and again they are different types of women , some like to write and some dont , it will depend on the girl , but nearly all will not want to write for years and expect you to put your money where your mouth is and visit her .
but even then this does not gaurantee you a wife , when you meet it is like the first blind date , all you have writen is put to the back of her mind and she will slowly see if you have been telling the truth or not . if you have not or not what she has hoped for , it is goodnight and good bye .
I would say to allow your genuine feelings show and be honest , why say to her i love you when you have not even met her , she will see through this ploy , they are women , mitchell , and they are not stupid and i am not joking here , most all of the girls have studied at universities and such and have degrees , but again , women will see right through a lie . and the day we men understand them is the day they will change again and we are back to square one .
If you are genunly seeking marriage , these women are worth the effort , and the expirerence of visiting the country is worth the trip , i did and intend to go back again , she will kill me if i dont
QC is right. Period.
If I was footloose and fancy free as in the past I would be there now. When you travel with no time agenda things are much easier. You can take a backpack, stay in hostels meet people and start to immerse yourself in the culture. I have done this in Latin America.
It is a totally different ballgame when you work within the confines of a job.
You have limited time and because of this you are not free.
I was in San Antonio packing my backpack on a table. Not sure where the hell I was going. I just said God where do you want tme now? At that second an English guy walked in the room and said why don't you come to Mexico City with me and my girlfriend and we will get you a job as an English teacher.
That is waht freedom brings the abiltity to do stuf like that. Unfortunately I work withn parameters and I hate it but what can tyou do?
As for Spirits comments about the woman in Chicago I couldn't agree more. This Natasha Jons in New York had the same attitude. An illegal alien, doesn't have a regular job and yet bitching because I balked at Broadway tickets at $80 a pop.
Writing is a waste of time. I had a conversation with a very nice woman form Ukraine yesterday. She said that these women receive anything up to 10 letters a day. There are tons of guys out there into this. They just don't talk about it.
If you are there and they can see you, meet you, talk with you it is worth more than 1,000 letters, IM's or calls.
I think I am actually learning after a year and thousands down the drain. :)) LOL