Hey guys if I get to be a bit much just tell me to shut up okay... I have been reading the threads here and really enjoying them for the most part. Like any forum there are some what I call PITA's. These folks try to stir up trouble and create ill will as far as I can tell. But, no different than any other forum I participate in.
So to my topic. I am 47 years old doing this for the first time and find myself feeling like I am about 19 at times. It is really something. I can't put my finger on it. My friends are really skeptical of me and think I have taken off on some kind of a mid life crisis. So, I dont' share much with them.
I am wondering what is the age range here. I am guessing 35+ for the most part. It is a rather expensive undertaking for one thing. But aside from that just to get to the point where I realize I am not going to be happy with and "American" woman took me 47 years:-) Maybe I am a slow learner. I guess my point is that the woman I have dated tried to date or just become friendly with don't seem to have my same ambitions and values in life...
I am wondering if any of you guys feel roghly the same or am I off center so to speak.
Your friends can be critical, but should still be supportive. If not, maybe they're not really friends.
I am 44 and I think most of us (at least those of us from the US and I believe Europe also) believe that we cannot find women that share the same values (for me meaning family priorities). It isn't that they don't exist, but there are fewer women with those values and therefore more difficult to find. Then they have to be single and attractive, with a modicum of self-respect (i.e. care about their appearance). I went to Ukraine, not because I couldn't find "the " woman here, but the odds of finding her were better there. I saw the cultural and language differences to be assets, not liabilities; lendning themselves to a lifetime of discovery.
If your friends are still being critical, ask your married, male friends how it would feel to look forward to coming home to a wife that looks forward to seeing you, instead of ready to pounce on you and remind you of all your faults. Ask them if they understand the difference between a female and a woman. Ask them which their wives act more like.
Personally for me, I'm very competitive. I've played sports at the collegiate level. I've never thought of a relationship between a man and a woman as a competition, but yet that is one aspect of my description of the more than common male-female relationship in the West. I've always thought of the relationship as symbiotic. It's hard to feel that when you get an attitude that says she doesn't think she really needs you.
Well am 50 (just) and I make no bones about it I want a good looking woman. As opposed to the buffalos in America. My god I just saw one who made my blood run cold. She is winking at me from 2 different sites. I would have to be deaf, dumb and blind to go near her and then I would want to commit hari kiri afterwards. With a blunt knife!!!!!!!! I am willing to send picture !! Just ask if you are brave enough.
Everything ditto says I endorse but I like good looking women and I just can't get one in America they are all taken. Mind you if I ever earn that $100,000 a year I will be fine. Of course if she decides she wants a 40 year old with $100,000 a year I will have to give her half.
So I guess I will stick to what I am doing :))
I am 48 (just)
I got confused and bewildered with women here in NZ. I am not like some males - what I mean is - I don't need to be with a women for just the animalistic attractions and rewards. If I can't be with a women who looks good and makes me feel proud and good to be with her - then I sooner go without.
3 years ago I had actually resigned myself to being a bachelor for the remainder of my life. I then stumbled onto the FSU dating sites by accident and away it went from there. I have always been more interested in countries and cultures that have the older traditional values. After communicating with ladies from Russia & Ukraine – I knew that my future partner was there.
I do wish I had found this Forum sooner than I did. I had actually already found my lady when I stumbled onto this forum. I know what you mean about sharing your thoughts with friends etc. They don’t understand and will not give the support your need and require. This is where this forum can be very good to voice your opinion or source some information when needed. Or just to vent some frustration or confusion and get it off your chest with others that know similar scenarios.
Hi. I'm 47 also and have been at this a few years now. I think I have found a wonderful woman and now am starting the visa process. I agree with most that has already been written above, except for izi's "Mind you if I ever earn that $100,000 a year I will be fine". I don't think even that makes the local women any better, and believe me it doesn' make the better ones come running to you.
Be prepared, however. This is not an easy or inexpensive process as you may have already read in other threads. Sometimes it is just plain frustrating. Writing and searching and establishing a relationship and then making the trip is time consuming and when it doesn't work out or she is not what you expected it is a let down. Most of us will tell you that the potential rewards are well worth the efforts. I have made six trips visiting two different girls. I have spent enough time with my future bride to know her fairly well and I feel confident that this is the right girl and we will have a great life together.
Well, I see that I am not alone in this search. I understand from reading the various threads on this formum that the process will not be easy. But, anything that is worthwhile is rarely gotten with ease.
I look forward to finding my other half like some of you veterans have.
Maybe one day when I am a veteran I will be able to help someone like me. And will have found my other half as well.
nj
I am one of the 49 yr olds and make over 100K but that has not helped me attract a quality bride in the states. Being only 5'2", my choices in the states are limited to blimps, Shamu, and beached whales. I need more than a pretty face but it sure is nice to have a pretty face in addition to brains and awesome figure. Maybe that sounds a bit shallow but I have a bit to offer and I will not settle for second rate.
No it's not an inexpensive process. In three trips alone to Ukraine I have about $10000 in it. But with the precious little lady I have found, you can't put a price on it. I just look at it this way. A miserable marriage cost me a lot more in money and other things. Anyway, what is happiness worth? Too me more than any amount of money this world has to offer. It's not the inability to find a woman here, it's a differnce in attitudes and our culture has become so askewed with many variants. To find a woman that puts each other first in our lives over material gains has been quite difficult. When these girls say they like being spoiled it's not in the material sense. They want to be spoiled with attention and affection. Just sit and think for a moment what they are going to spend themselves. They are walking away from a life style, friends and family that they've known all their life for the pursuit of happiness. Now who is investing more in the search of happiness?
What I am saying about the money is that you stand a much better chance with an American woman if you earn $100K or more because at least she will look at you!
A lot of times they are not even that great looking and STILL want that kind of income from the guy.
So having the money gets you to square one then LOOK OUT!! Because we ain't done yet. Now you got to find one worth your time keeping.
Double edged sword.
The whole dating/marriage thing in the west is an accidental sort of deal and I feel like the accident that is happening :)) LOL
NJ....
Feel young baby !!! i have played the dating scene in many other different countries and now i can hardly consider an american woman. Being from las vegas i get to date mountains of foreigners here in the states but the women of the FSU stand head and shoulders above asian, latinas and ESPECIALLY american gals. I'm 38 and not really "loaded" in any sense of the word but i have done this before and even though it didnt work for me that relationship was waaaaay better then any i have experienced from american gals.
so dig in NJ. you are in for the adventure of your life. get on that plane dude and dont look back. The pursuit of a wife overseas is truely the spice of life.
.....and I am sooo young and handsome... lol... only 38... But feeling like 25 again!!! Money-question??? I have enough, but not too much :)) Actually, the money thing is so individual. Someone that make 50 000$ a year can live a better life than someone that make 100 000$ a year.. It depends on how you live, and how good you are with your money! Where I live 100 000$ isn't that much at all, but then again, everything is more expensive here, so probably you will get more for your 100 000$ than I am... - The great thing is that I can take my pension and live anywhere in the world when I get old enough.. lol.. Then I will be a really wealthy man :) -I just need to work for another 20 years first... lol
Nor, you hit it on the head, it's not how much money you make, it's what you do with the money you make. You can make 60,000 a year and have more disposable income than a guy making 100,000.
That is so true, I believe also if your good at handling Money, its when you start trying to live above your Means that gets you way behind. Not A good way to have to live your life. I have been there and now I like Good things just dont need tons of it.
I agree with IZ you do stand A way better chance, I see Lawyers in my area with Ladies that are Gold Diggers Huge, and Hot. If thats there cup of tea then blow your Load I mean wad :)))) I want to come Home to someone that wants to be treated good and cares about me.