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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > advice, and help please. Author Post apatosaur Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/31/2003 11:34:15 PM   I was contacted out the blue, by a russian woman, in commonn personal dating site.(I was seeking to meet women in my area of the united states) I asked her if she contacted me by mistake, but no she had not. In her second letter, she asked if I was honestly looking for the right woman, and was not seeking nude pictures, as she heard sometimes happens on the internet. i responded no, and asked if she was just a scam artist as i had heard comes from fsu. i got a scathing no, and we have continued, writing letters for about a month, she has not asked for money, and has not yet proffessed to loving me, though she now saya she thinks about me all the time. She says she has no phone, lives with her parents, and has no computer, she goes to the cafe for internet, which closes on weekends. She also says, she is a doctor, but at her hospital, it has no phone that can call oversees.(I didn't ask for her to tell me that, she just came up w/it. we have exchanged 9 e-mail letters now. She has sent 3 different picture that are obviously taken by a photographer. She is still interested in me, despite the fact that i'm just a factory worker, part time artist, Who is recently divorced/ w a son. I have looked at differnt sites, for info on this sot of thing, and have contacted other russian women as way of gauging her letters, which sound sincere, and sounds like she knows english ok, but not well enough to catch all the nuiances of american english, i try to keep my english very simple, so she understands me better. Obviously I'm starting to become realy interested in her, and seek advice on: Does this sound genuine to you? How do I check to make sure she's really who, she says she is? What steps should i take, if I was interested in bringing her over here for marriage?(Not sure about that yet.) Any and all advice you can give me is appreciated.This was the only forum i could find, that I could come to for questions. Thank you, for any advice or help you give me. CodeRed Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/1/2003 12:01:37 AM   Maybe Olga will be willing to contact her for you and add her to their service so they can help you with all the arriangements and with a better line of communications. Lets see what Olga has to say. But to me it doesent sound like a scam. I think you need to discuss this with the site coustomer service. If you look on the site you can email them at service@dating-ru.com or call them 011 7 3432 466547 I think its best you call them and ask what they can do for you, they speak good english and are nice people willing to do what they can. Goodluck! Olga Moderator send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/1/2003 12:43:10 AM   hi apatosaur. I dont think that this is enough info for making any conclusions on if it is genuine, but I agree with CodeRed,it doesnt looks like a scam.To find out if she's really who, she says she is, just try to communicate more. Ask for her snail mail address and exchange a few letters by snail mail, ask her for casual photos, not made by professional photographer, ask more about her family. Ask her for permission to talk t her on the phone. If she has no phone at home or cant talk to you from work, ask her about a phone at her friend's apartment, and may be she will not mind talking to you from here.i dont think you need to make any arrangements with this site service since you can write to her directly and since she knows english enough to understand you.May be when you have her snail address you would like to send her some flowers via our service( by the wau this is a good way to check if she is real ;-)). In any way, 9 messages is not enough to say anything abiut a person or his intentions. But the fact that she was not asking for money so far is a definitely good sign ;-)As for your last question on marriage-I think you are just in the beginning of this road and until you are sure that you need this wpman and until you meet her in person, you dont even need to think about those steps. Right now you need a good communication with her. janwas Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/1/2003 2:33:43 AM   Dear apatosaur, Women in Russia usually lives with their parents, so it is perfectly normal. Being a doctor does not mean that she is rich !! Remember that you can meet her just as friends. I hope you will not promise to marry her before you have even met her ??? As Olga says, ask her for her address and send photos and letters. Avoid using agencies for correspondense as it will just cost a lot of money. Remember how the situation is in Russia, and that they are looking for a better life as Russia has become disorganized and hard to live in. CodeRed Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/1/2003 4:10:14 PM   janwas What age do you live in. Woman in Russia Usually live with parents. Yes some do, But most go to collage and start their own life on their own. Or share a flat with friends. Not many live with parents these days unless they have to. Most strive to be on their own. The economy is getting better each day there. Its not as disorganized as you make it out. They are still building their country and its getting better each day. Yes life is hard depending on what you call hard. Most woman want a better life and admire the foreign mens values in family. Also the way a foreign men treats a woman compaired to Russian men. The economy and standard of living is not the best in Russia. It has a long way to go. However, the living is getting better. You make it sound like its so bad there. Its not. Many woman change their minds after they sign on these sites. Yes they want a better life. Dont we all? There is allot more to it than disorganized and hard to live in. And here you say: ask her for her address and send photos and letters. But then you say (in another topic) you wont ask for her address she should offer it? which is it ? apatosaur Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/1/2003 9:13:07 PM   thank all of you for your advice, I will take most of it. She has already sent me her snail-mail address, and in acouple of weeks, i believe i will take and send a letter and picts. through this service to check and see, if she is really who she says she is, I have grilled her on coming to american, and she is very willing. She also dropped a bomb on me today, she says she believes she loves me. i was stunned. I haven't replied yet, and will carefully word a message asking her to think about it and slow down. we have exchanged, quite a bit of personal info, too much to go into detail here, but it does make me wonder? janwas Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 2:09:14 AM   CodeRed, How many times have you been to Russia ? So you think a 25 year old woman marries someone who is 40-50 years old ONLY for love??? Many divorced women with children live with their mothers because it is too expensive to live alone, and they donīt have daycarecenters the way we are used to, so they depend a lot on their parents and grandparents. Of course things are hard in Russia. Why else do you think we have all the prostitutes here that come in buses each weekend across the border to Sweden ? I doubt they do it because they enjoy it... I am in the Navy and we meet Russian men now and then on exercises so I know the values they have, but the main problem is that the salary is so low that they cannot support a family. "Offer her address?" When did I say that? I have said that it must be the womanīs choice if she wants to give away her address or not, not the agencies choice. It is not the USSR anymore with KGB telling people what to do....right? gary496 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 2:30:41 AM   apatosaur, I don't think the fact that she says "she loves you" is all that bad. After all, you have corresponded for a while now and she knows a little about you. Just watch for the warning signs of a scam, like her mother suddenly gets sick and she needs money for an operation, etc. Then again, she could be a keeper, so I would follow through until you find out otherwise. CodeRed Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 2:41:08 AM   janwas ??????? Your so far off your contradicting your own statements. apatosaur, Olga and Gary496 are correct. dont let some peoples bleak pale pitcher they paint scare you. Good Luck!! janwas Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 2:47:46 AM   CodeRed, Are you some kind of Police telling people what to write and think? Then I can understand why you americans bring "freedom" to Iraq with missiles and tanks..... CodeRed Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 3:07:12 AM   Nice off topic comments. Have a good day janwas sorry to hurt your expert feelings. Im done with you and your sour remarks. You just showed your true colors and your lack of undersatnding of world events. This forum is not about Iraq. Your not worth my time. Olga, I dont think this is the place to debate world events. Dont you agree? To all others of this forum sorry for the way this all went. Olga Moderator send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 3:33:46 AM   I agree. This was an off topic comment and please janwas, dont discuss Iraq here. I guess we all have something to say on this matter, but lets keep it for other forums. janwas Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 3:39:56 AM   CodeRed, I am NOT an expert. The idea with a forum is that people can share their experiences and ideas. We have differnet backgrounds, race, nationality, but are all welcome to join the discussions. I think readers here are adult people and can make their own decisions based on comments from different members, without a "police" telling people what is "right" or "wrong". World events: Yes, I think WAR is wrong. That is MY opinion. Olga Moderator send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2003 5:14:47 AM   I thought this topic is closed already.If you'll insist on posting messages on Iraq topic, I'll have to delete those. You are right people are free to tell what they think, I just asked you to use some other places for discussion of world events. Russian brides > Main Forum > advice, and help please.
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