I was corresponding for several weeks with a girl in St. Petersburg through fiance.com. e-mail. After speaking to her on the phone, and thinking about many details and circumstances, I am now persuaded - though I cannot prove it - that it wasn't the girl who wrote the letters, but someone on her behalf. Now my antenna is a bit more sensitive, and I am starting to think the same about a girl in Gorlovka, whom I am now corresponding with. I am not paranoid. I am corresponing with about ten or twelve girls, and I have no such suspect but with this girl in Gorlovka. Can these things happen in fiance.com partner agencies? Is this approved, allowed, or tolerated?
it is not approved, allowed, or tolerated. agencies are not allowed to write without ladies knowledge
please email IDs of the ladies to admin. we will investigate that agency.
you talked to that lady on the phone? talk to the lady in Gorlovka too.
if you have phone number ask for private email, start corresponding, communication directly.
I have not yet talked to that lady on the phone. And here is another interesting point. I have seen this point already discussed here, I read many plausible explanations, but none of them completely convincing. Why are girls so reluctant when I ask them for their phone numbers? I only asked for phone numbers to girls I was going to meet in person, three altogether, and none of them was prone to give it to me. One of them openly refused, and then I didn't feel comfortable with her anymore, and I decided not meet her anymore.
Anyway, Olga, thanks for your feedback. I will go on exchanging a couple of letters again, I will ask the "girl" a couple of test questions, and if this reinforces my suspicion, I will email ID of this lady to admin.
chrisc, what you write makes a lot of sense. I just would like to believe that ethics isn't just a meaningless word on this site...
Maybe the girls who do not give you number are not that interested in you. I worry more about meeting with
the girls. I always have back up girls in case girl is not what she seems to be. I learned from my first trip
to not go see only one girl in each city, have plan b and plan c. Fooled me once shame on you....fooled me
twice shame on me!
In St Pete's, I ended up having a nice time seeeing the city, paid a girl/guide to show me around, quite
interesting history. She was from a marriage agency. They are expensive, $15 an hour but its okay if you
know what your paying for ahead of time and its YOUR choice. Next time I go, I have a really good feel for
city and feel confident
actually I went to St Pete and my plan was to meet two girls, 'a' and 'b'. Girl 'a' was the one whom I found inconsistencies about after phone talks, and girl 'b'. Girl 'a', who even seemed too good to be true when writing letters, was in fact so little... perspicacious that I was forced to give up meeting her at all. I had a good time with 'b', anyway. And I want to think positive. It was my first experience of a travel to FSU to meet girls I was corresponding with through the internet, I have not yet found my 'second half', but I had a good time with a very pretty girl, and saw a wonderful city. Sorry if my English is strange at times. I am Italian, and live in Italy.
For sure, what I have learnt from my little experience, is that this FSU ladies dating 'game' is a hell of a minefield, even if the site you rely on has a good reputation like this, and you know the basic, common sense rules to avoid the obvious scams. I only hope the next blast won't be so destructive to 'kill' my enthusiasm.
Was your meetings arranged by an agency or by yourself? My problem was trying to arrange meetings with girls,
three of them, was difficult in timing everything. What if one girl you wanted to stay longer? And can you tell
each girl that you here to meet others, what will they think. Do you tell them a story? I'm sure they would
like to think they are the reason you came to the city. The agency was the one which arranged one meeting for
me. Seems they can arrange several meetings and girls won't know much about your trip( length and why). The ones
I did not meet in St Pete's are hoping I will come back again for a visit. I 'm working on more Ukraine girls,
just as beautiful only no visa needed.
the meetings were arranged by myself. I doubted a lot about how to manage meetings with two girls on one trip. As a rule I don't want to lie, and I think that not-to-say is a much lighter 'sin' than lying (if it's a sin at all). In short, I openly told girl 'b' before my trip that I was going to meet another girl as well. She was not offended, on the contrary she valued my honesty. I just told nothing to girl 'a' about my intention to meet another girl. I don't think this should be taken as a universal recipe. In my case, it worked. But the whole business was obviously made easier by the fact that I dropped girl 'a'. In any case, my experience tells me that you won't necessarily offend a girl if you honestly tell her that you are going to meet someone else too.
What agency arranged your meetings? It seems we are living in parallel... I am more on Ukrainian girls too now :-) No visa, as beautiful as Russian girls, shorter trip...
No, you tell them the truth. If they can't take it then dump 'em. Any woman that thinks you traveled a couple of thousand miles & spent hundreds of $'s just to see her hasn't got both oars in the water. She is likely seeing several men, just as you are seeing several women & if she can't deal with that, its time to move on.
Any man who is going to go just to see one woman is truly a gambler & not a very good one. Every gambler knows you got the odds stacked against you going in. If your going to go to see one woman without a backup plan, you are a fool, plain & simple. If your going to see many, be honest & tell them, they will appreciate your honesty, otherwise they are not marriage material.
I agree with you, but I would be cautious. This is a delicate matter, and I think that what to say, and how to say it, should be considered case by case. Yes, a woman who does not accept that you are are seeing several women hasn't got both oars in the water - thank you for English lessons :-) - and chances are that she's not marriage material. However, if she got emotionally involved throughout the correspondence before the meeting, I would be very careful about choosing the words that announce you are also interested in other women, and you are going to meet them on the same trip. This has much to do with the emotional mind of that woman, and little to do with her rational mind. But this is it, and I think it's important. Again from my little experience, it can be totally devastating for you, or the woman, to take a false step at an early stage.
Going back to the initial subject, form your side you should make sure as soon as possible you are not getting emotionally involved with Vladimir of Xyz Agency, rather than with the gorgeous girl in the photos... :-))
"""However, if she got emotionally involved throughout the correspondence before the meeting, I would be very careful about choosing the words that announce you are also interested in other women, and you are going to meet them on the same trip."""
That only willhappen if you lead her on in the correspondence to believe that yo are going only to see her. If you are open & honest from the get go there will be no need for pussy footin' around.
Women at agencies know you are coming to see more than just one. Thats how the agency scene is geared.They are prepared for it & accept it. They, like you, are searching for the right one,not just any one. At least if they are in it for the right reasons. Any responsible & honest agency owner verifies that before listing them or allowing them to register with the agency. Saves a lot of heartache down the road for everybody involved.
What a bullshitter that Olga is
it is not approved, allowed, or tolerated. agencies are not allowed to write without ladies knowledge
nearly all the agencys do this with the first few letters
all the scammers deny this
I don't know if I can say the agency that helped me in St Pete's. The moderators might say it's advertising
a commercial product. It was an agency used by one girl I was writing to. Their charges for their work are
rather expensive, they try to make the meeting look glamourous. I balked and just wanted to meet the girl. Of
course the interpreter was expensive but I could limit it or use it as much as I wanted it. Nice to have something
I could control. They are honest and reliable,just expensive.
15 dollars per hour is way over priced. Even for St. Pete. 10 dollars per hour is the pretty much the going rate in Kiev the capital of Ukraine. You will get as low as 6 per hour in the smaller cities. You are also better off setting up your own interpreter outside the agency you plan to meet your girls with. This will avoid the collusion scam. Girl and Interpreter working together and splitting up the profits after you leave. Use the power of the Internet guys. You can find Interpreters and apartments or anything you need. Especially in major cities. Good luck!
I am much appreciating the advice you guys are posting here. I think nothing can be substitute for experience.
About interpreters, in another thread someone advises against using them. He thinks it's a waste of time - and money, I would add - basically because it's impossible to portray feelings through a third person.
you could limit the interpreter or use her as much as you wanted. All in all, was it worth using the interpreter? What do you think the girl's English skills should be to make it useless? Maybe 5 or 6?
I don't mind using an interpreter on a limited basis, maybe in the beginning. I think if the girl is interested
she will try to work with you and the point will get across. I do agree that it is difficult to get close to a girl if there is a third person around. From what I have read on other threads, many guys only write to girls with good English skills, that is good it leaves me with less competition. Just have to learn the girls language, that will
really impress her. 5 or 6 is a pretty good start.