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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > Different "types" of marriage could lead to some pretty interesting proposals. Author Post CodeRed Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 7/14/2003 7:41:50 PM   Different "types" of marriage could lead to some pretty interesting proposals. A new piece of legislation has reached the Arizona State Legislature. A bill has been introduced (similar to bills in many other states) calling for a new category of marriage called “covenant marriage.” This optional category of marital contract would be considered more permanent. “No-fault” divorces would not be granted to covenant marriages; instead a divorce could only be obtained in cases of adultery, abuse, abandonment (or one of the other heinous offenses that all seem to start with the letter “A”) Covenant marriages would be for keeps. Essentially it boils down to this: if the law passes, couples here will have two choices: they can really get married or they can just sort of get married. To me, it’s a pretty sad commentary on the state of matrimony in the culture that we even have to think about laws like this. Isn’t this what marriage is supposed to be in the first place? Correct me if I’m wrong, (leaving out Domestic Violence) and you all may hammer me for this, but marriage is a permanent contract, right? Doesn’t the phrase “till death do us part” come in there somewhere? Better/worse, richer/poorer, sickness/health -- that covers a lot of territory. Are we really taking that commitment so lightly that we have to invent a whole new category of marriage just to reestablish some semblance of what marriage is supposed to be in the first place? When no-fault divorce came along, a lot of people thought it was a good thing. If someone doesn’t want to stay in a marriage, what reason could we possibly have to force him or her to stick around? Well, a generation later we’ve found the reasons. “Society goes the way of the family.” Family stability is essential to individual stability, and thus too social stability. First, individuals. Once that marriage contract is made, there are people whose well-being depends on that commitment. A RW woman, in particular, has a lot to lose if her husband doesn’t keep up his end of the bargain. She leaves her country, and friends, often quits working and has to be retrained in the States or works at much less than full capacity so that she can devote her time and energy to raising children. Her earning potential is thus seriously compromised, and she relies on her husband for support. Her husband, likewise, needs her to devote that important time and attention to the children. And, of course, they rely on each other emotionally as well. They’ve made a commitment. They’re a “team”. And when one teammate bails out, the other is left high and dry -- physically, emotionally and financially. And then there are the children. The family is a child’s whole world. Their security, their identity, their structure and their sense of safety all lie in knowing that their parents are there for him, in his home, operating as a unit. Not to mention the fact that you’re adopted or stepchild just left every thing they know in life also. A divorce rips their world apart in a way that no child support, no gifts and no weekend trips to Disneyland could ever begin to mend. Researchers in one 20-year study have found that a majority of children never, repeat never; fully recover from their parents’ divorce. Not at 18, or 25, or 50. Never. It doesn’t take a genius to see that we’ve traveled well down that path in the generation since no-fault divorce appeared. Sure, sometimes couples shouldn’t remain under the same roof. If one parent poses a severe physical, emotional or moral threat to the rest of the family, (Domestic Violence) a separation is absolutely necessary. But let’s be very clear. “Mommy isn’t fulfilled” does not constitute a threat to the family. And “I don’t love her anymore” doesn’t change the initial consent. Marriage, real marriage, means forever. Given all of that, I’m not sure exactly how I feel about the “covenant marriage” legislation. Obviously, I like the concept. But do we really want to create “levels” of commitment in marriage? Are we then giving more institutional legitimacy to these “quasi-marriages” so common today? Should we instead work to strengthen all marriages? The current proposal does offer the potential for some pretty entertaining marriage proposals. “Will you marry me . . . well, kind of. Not a covenant or anything. I mean, I do want to spend the rest of my life with you . . .well, maybe not my whole life, but at least the part where you’re still attractive . . .” I know most Russian woman will never know that piece of Arizona State Legislation. They fully expect and trust in you to be taking that commitment with them for Better/worse, richer/poorer, sickness /health “till death do us part”! (I’ll take a hit on that statement to I expect). Well looking for your thoughts? Would you make a special effort for a covenant marriage? Good Luck norway Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 7/14/2003 8:29:34 PM   Show me a young love that doesn't shout out it's invincibility. Just what kind of a profession of love is it for an infatuated 17 year old to go for a half-marriage. No, it'll be the drive in for covenant marriage and they'll end up driving each other to abuse if they are not allowed to regret.You can't make rules that don't fit people. As long as the power and status of sexuality and egoism is pushed from every other corner of society, divorse statistics won't change. Of course the idea of getting married in stages is better. Like the old days when people got engaged. Like will you marry me premium...and then 2 years later, will you upgrade to VIP? I think that might work if it is illegal to upgrade until you've been 'engaged' for a year, and it's not socially acceptable to have children until you are fully married. norway Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 7/14/2003 8:40:02 PM   How the US IMS is going to cope with this is another question. I think it would soon become the profession toping the suicide statistics. Your Reply: Your name:   New Registration Password:   Forgot password?   refresh Code:   Russian brides > Main Forum > Different "types" of marriage could lead to some pretty interesting proposals.
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