I write this post as it would be interesting for all of us to see, So how many of us guys on this site are getting married or did marry.Also if your happy.Or things didnt work out .Please dont write met really nice woman soon we meet etc.Only if you are married or visa is stamped reply .Lets get the facts
me and olya are going to get married. and she is the first girl i went to see from fsu, but only after a year of expensive phone calls! lol! and living together for two intensive months in kyiv! she is the best, i wouldn't change anything. only thing i would say about *not* sending them anything... sending flowers is always a good idea! always is... /pete
im married 4 months and go over and back alot, madly in love visa granted and big move is next month
she has two weeks of exams and then we go to Hungary for a week to my brother and his partner and back home then.
Herge's Adventures of Tintin,
I picked one photo out of 1500 from 3 sites and wrote to this girl, then focused all of my attention on her when my intelligence told me she was genuine after several letter exchanges. We are marrying in Russia in February, two and a half years after the first communication.
Been married almost 3 years and know her for 6 years. Its been pointed out a few times that the hard work comes after marriage when your living together, espeically if she has moved to your country. With cultural differences it can be hard so its best to try and overcome or deal with these first and not just assume things will be fine. Don't rush in it, take your time. Of course its well worth the effort :)
Married a Russian gal from Velikiy Novgorod. Ah... she looked like she was dancing when she walked, I used to get a lot of attention when we were out... anyway she got homesick for her "grown" children and family and she left. My lawyer is stumped, he can't quite figure out how to get me a divorce (been 8 months now). Anyway I'm looking again but this time she has to have a child which she brings with her so she dosen't feel so isolated.
Hmmmmm. Mini Coop....know what a recipe for disaster is...separating a mother from her children.
I would never have serious relationship with a girl that did not include her children in a marriage. It is like girl is on a vacation. She knew at some point she was going back home. At least that is what I think.
Hey Coop...whose idea was it not to bring kids? If it was the girl's, then she had no intention of staying with you. When I talk to girls with kids, I always speak in terms of a package deal, girls always comes with the kids. I don't know of any 'good' women that would leave her kids. Fact is, I was seeing a girl one time and I told her, never come between me and my kids, you'll always be 3rd!!
Dunromin...which came first...the chicken or the eggs????
Coop, How old are the "grown" children? Did she leave saying she would be back? Was she homesick and you bought a ticket thinking she would be back after a visit? Any contact with her since? I ask because some of the ladies I write have grown children (over 18) and I wonder about if they really understand what they are getting into. Did she initially think she would be able to go back once (twice) a year and that would be enough? Really sorry that happened...When you said, "she looked like she was dancing when she walked" I could tell you really care about her.
"Eggs were around before the chicken arrived. They may not have been chicken eggs, but they were eggs."Texasdude
Ben2006 has hit a topic that is really important. All the things involved prior to her arrival is the easy part. It's something that's really not talked alot about and should be. The visa's the dating, the courting process is really the easy part.
Bringing her to your country requires a great amount of sacrifice and patience on our part. It's something I think guys should consider, really consider. I think the difficulty even is greater the farther away she moves.
In the beginning she is going to be totally dependent on you. Your time has to be dedicated to her totally. The transition has bumps along the way. Even though ours was relatively easy, there is still some difficult spots. Not matter what the circumstance it is always done better in their country. No matter what, the food is better in their country (Which I don't deny for the most part) Their medical treatments and doctors are better,(which I do argue) Though she has admitted our dentistry is way beyond anything in Ukraine. Wow a first!!!LOL. Though our automobiles she likes too much and can't settle on the new car she wants. We've been all over the board on that one. So don't take their country does it better personally. It's their grasping at their culture that no longer exists. I've talked with other guys who have had difficulty with this.
The language presents a problem and for the most part what I have learned is not that they don't know it with study, they are a bit hesitant with engaging in it with strangers. This is something I encourage. It's easy with me, because she is comfortable with speaking with me and she knows I'm willing to help in correcting her speaking. This is something she desires because she wants to speak well.
Also network with other speakers of her language. Don't take that away, my wife speaks with about five ladies in the states that are wives of former members of this forum. Her Dentist wife is from Kiev and they talk frequently in their language. It gives them a piece of home far away. Embrace their culture in your home. Let them control the house and decorating, though that was easy form me since I decorated my house in early adolescence. Though I went a tad overboard with totally gutting our home and redecorating. A project that is still in process. They have very creative minds with your sweat LOL!!
Though the bottom line is patience, patience, and more patience. I admit there have been times I've walked out to my garage and wanted to scream, but in the long run this has been worth more than anything I will ever experience in my life with a truly wonderful, intelligent and beautiful woman who brings more to the table than you will ever believe.
Oh by the way, when I first came here there were about ten guys that were successful and gave me a lot of advice, being the novice then that I picked and used that would work for my personality. So the list is quite larger than what is being written here.