For some time now i have looked at the possibility to find my romance in the eastern part of Europe. It is not that i could not find a woman of my taste in the city i live in, but a very positive experience in my earlier years convinced me, that girls from that eastern european part of the world have something really special..... i guess it is the debt and complexity of the russian soul and the rich culture of those girls that get me to endure the 1000 obstacles of distance dating to meet Ms. Right of my dreams.
For about 1 year now i have written on several russian dating sites to a number of very attractive girls (attractive physically as well as by personality profile), however, the conversations never move beyond a certain debt of conversation. And it is not for lag of trying.... i am a PhD in Psychology and feel well equipped to "lead" a conversation eventually to a debt that allows me to really get to know the girl before i jump on a plane to visit her, or buy her a ticket to visit me. Nevertheless, all of them seem to be very content to have "endless" correspondence without aim and purpose. In fact most of those girls seem to not even be girls at all, because their psychological responsiveness and application of vocabulary is more of that of a male then a female....
so here is my question after this long intro:
Has anyone here on this site made better experiences in this are as i have been making on some of the other sites? Did any one of you actually get to meet the girl of his dreams, marry her and be happy ever since?
The Doctor: You’ve probably “pegged” it. The lovelies you will very often contact via websites are ball baring and not child baring. (Scam groups of men posing with women’s photos)
You will find plenty of decent women, plenty of scammers, plenty of everything in between on websites and on the street in FSU countries. Notwithstanding, for one who is prepared to walk the walk and not simply talk the talk (Read, do the hard work which includes visiting) the rewards are available.
My experience (limited though it is, especially compared with most of the members of this forum) is that the quicker you advance to phone calls the better. Although a lot of Western men might like the depth (not "debt"!) that a good letter may provide, the reality is that most people today can't be bothered with endless correspondence.
Any decent woman will either ask you to ring her or will just stop writing - most seem to want instant responses, including jumping on the next plane. Just look at the number on any dating site who specify that they want to meet someone within (for example) three months. While that might work for Donald Trump, it doesn't for Joe Average, who has to save for his holidays and can only spare a certain amount of time (usually limited, and definitely not enough to really start a relationship).
My experience is that letter writing campaigns only lead to debt. I know girls that are employed by agencies to write letters. They have a big store of text that they cut and paste to put together letters. Their job is to keep the correspondence going as long as possible and discourage real meetings.
My suggestion is to learn Russian, pick a city that you want to visit, write to 10-20 girls from this site who live in that city and say that you will be there in 3 weeks, contact a local agency and do the same thing with their girls, and then go.
It's better to show up and meet the girls. Most girls have no loyalty to a letter.
P.S. Be careful thinking that the romantic idea of the "debt and complexity of the Russian soul," exists today in young girls.
The aucklander is absolutely right!! i did mean "depth" not "debt" in both instances!!! Thanks for the correction....
....so, taking the advice from those letters it appears that learning russian and go there myself may be my best bet.... i did try phone calls with 3 different girls, however, only to get the funny feeling that the conversation was somewhat staged.... the girls did not exactly act very interested in any particular subject or asked any probing line of questions as i would have expected if they would be genuinely interested in me.... the very impersonal paid interpreter did not help to add any warmth to the conversation either...
maybe i will go on one of those romance tours..... except i think they may be a bit awkward for both.. the man and the girls. I my opinion they seem to pre-impose behavior that may cause to some degree embarrassment. Did anyone ever go to one of those "romance Tours"?
if so, what was the experience like? What advice would you give me?
WARNING EVERYONE I CAN FIND! Larisa from Vinnitsa SCAM WARNING! Anastasia International has been advised of a scam several times, and it is on again, and they do nothing about it. This tells me that they know it and don't care. The local agency is using a woman's pics and info to get letters. They will charge you for stuff and send you old delivery pictures. If you think you are communicating with Larisa Mikhailik from Vinnitsa, blonde, green eyes, age 31, you are scammed. She's now ID: 1087995 at Anastasia, and GZ3310 at most other sites. I know, I've been to Vinnitsa, and Odessa and Krakow, and Kyiv all with Larisa. She asked me to get all her info off all the sites they had put her on. It;s the agency writing the letters, and a girl at the agency taking your calls, Many agencies do this I've learned. Larisa speaks English and French, no need for a translator service, accept for complicated conversations, but no need for emails... DONT GET SCAMMED. I DID!
Learning Russian is not necessary though is useful. Learn the alphabet and use local free Russian Language sites. It doesnt take long to work them out. Select an area or region you want to visit. Make plans to visit some girls then go!
Why would anyone be interested in someone who you can't have a convo with in real time. Telephone, messenger...what ever.
Guys spend so much time and effort cultivating a relationship by writing emails (or "letters" as most scammers call them).
If you can't speak to her or see her after a few exchanges she ain't real.
Forget pay per letter sites, go to a dating site that has IM function and message exchange. Most websites with IM allow webcam too so you can see the girl you are talking to.
There a thousands of girls on the web looking for men from Europe or USA.
If they have their profile on there with nice pics, nice text that tells you what is on her mind, her home town, job etc etc and if they log-on regularily at normal hours then they are serious.
You hook up with one or two...more if you have time and begin correspondance...in real time.
If you like her and she likes you she will give you her private email and phone number. If not...move on.
I have been on sites with IM and cam facility with good success. The one I used had a chatroom too and you could see people hooking up all the time.
It's easy if you make it so. Writing letters for months is a waste of time.
GeminiDreams, in my opinion, and Kirkland has the right idea. Just get out there, use letters and the internet (a little as possible) and go out there (where ever you decide) and see for yourself.If you are a psychologist?.. then talk to danny377 because he really could do with some therapy, maybe even a couch..bless you danny...;-)
PS IF DANNY377 reacts badly to my comment then I suggest that you GET A LIFE AND FIND SOME HUMOUR IN YOUR AND LIFE!
To me I have found success writing but quickly following up with a call. And here is a little hint: Get the prepaid calling cards for Mexico for the gas station...they do international at 5 cents a minute. The best deal I can get on ATT is 23 cents a minute and thats with paying extra for the international plan.
But you have to get her on the phone now. I found my Anya on website. Always had good success with that one. If the girl even mentions getting money, they take her off the site. Seems to be a pretty good site. Obviously the girls are pressured to respond to you because if they dont respond to a lot of emails from men, they get nasty letters from the site people but you will know pretty soon if she is interested in your or not.
If she is, she will write more and more. If you are getting one email a week, shes probably not interested. Or if you are getting one liners or such, the same.
But use common sense here. If you are 50 and balding, dont waste your time on a 21 year old hottie. Number one, there is no way in hades that she is really interested in you. Secondly, you will have zero in common with her even if you do get with her. So in the end, stick with those somewhat close to your age just like you would in your country.
But I would say you need to call her by say 4-5 letters. You can hear in her voice if shes interested or not because she will be anticipating your call.
And word of advice, stay away from the Basic to Fair English speakers. Very little you can communicate here. Unless you are happy envisioning having just a silent maid to walk behind you, you will want to be able to communicate with her. I tried once with the Fair and it wasnt good. I called her and very little could be communicated. Was a waste of time. Any dream of bringing this wonderful woman over and teaching her the language is just that, a dream.
My advice is also to stay FAR away from cities like Kiev, Odessa, etc that have populations over 300k. If you truely want what you described in your initial post, you wont find it there more than likely. Its like wanting a country girl with home values looking for her in New York City. Its possible but completely unlikely. Stick with the smaller towns and you will have a lot better luck finding a real woman.
Quote: “My advice is also to stay FAR away from cities like Kiev, Odessa, etc that have populations over 300k. If you truely want what you described in your initial post, you wont find it there more than likely. Its like wanting a country girl with home values looking for her in New York City. Its possible but completely unlikely. Stick with the smaller towns and you will have a lot better luck finding a real woman.”
Translated: There is a higher percentage of desperates in the boonies.
From everyting I have read, I ws very, very lucky. I met the first lady I wrote to, (only wrote to one other) 4 months after starting up. We wrote each other almost every day. I proposed on the second day, went back agin 3 monts later, went back again to pick her up and her daughter to do the exit interview and fly home. That was almost 9 years ago and we have a second girl, now age 5. Idid not put a lot of thought into getting scammed or anything like that.
Wow, I have been to Ukraine 3 times in the last six months. I have met in person around 20 girls. I have many friends there that are from dating sites. Scammers? well in your opinion what is a scammer? There are plenty of American girls that will bleed you dry and not think twice about it. The difference is there meals cost more, there clothes cost more. I mean so a girl gets paid for writing letters, chatting or whatever BFD. If you can't afford to pay the girl and most of the time they are HOT then don't chat. Yes guys the girls do get paid for nearly everything they do. No doubt it. I have girls that do dating sites for a job, well to be honest most of them do. Does that mean they are not serious? Well some are and some are not. How do you know what ones are and are not, well common sense OK. If you have no common sense DON"T go OK stay at home and get screwed by american women. I guess in a sense there are a lot of Americans that are scammers, get divorced in this country and see what it cost?? I just gave my ex wife $500,000 what the hell do you call that? American women are the biggest scammers of all time. You whine and bitch because a girls really doesn't get the flowers or gifts?? True most of the time they do not OK. There are exceptions to every rule OK. Small agencies actually do give the gifts and do not pay the girls because they really can't afford it. The small agencies are pretty much very honest and the girls don't get paid. You go to Nikolaev and I will say if you want to get laid and you are not some over the hill fat guy you will have a good chance. For you boneheads that are american that think these girls just want to come to the States and just because you are American does not mean they will want you OK. Stop being idiots. If you can't afford to go there don't go. I am 52 I have met with some very beautiful mid 20's women, I work out a lot, have a brown belt in karate, 6'1" 235 lbs, with a 32 waist. Yes I have slept with quite a lot of them but do I really want to marry a 25 year old girl ??? NO I don't. I have had my fun now I am in search of a woman in her late 30's to early 40's. Come on guys be REALISTIC. I don't and won't date American women they are the biggest scammers of all. OK. If you want to know about the real world of dating in Ukraine go there but use common sense.