Aft'noon all!
I haven't had much luck checking on what fees are associated with Russian foreign passports and visas to the U.S.
Yes, I know that it's pert-near impossible for a visa to be gotten, but at the moment I'm just trying to make sure the fee schedule she's giving me is right. She's saying it would be $290. for the passport and another $240. for the visa. Both sound a little high to me, but not entirely implausible. Advice, please-and-thank-you?
She will have sourced an agency, having perhaps shopped around for the best price, and they can organise everything for an extortionate amount of dolloars and all you have to do is Western Union the money to her, she might even tell you that you need to provide her with the WU transfer number, I think it's an 8 digit number.
If you were fool enough to send that money then that might be the last you hear from her or ..... she/he/they may think "we've got a right sucker here" and they'll continue to bleed you for more monies right up until the point where she is pretending to be at Moscow airport and they won't let her on the plane, without sufficient living expenses, and you must send her another $500 or whatever amount.
I got an idea Zoomie......maybe it is best to visit HER or maybe not because you will be holding an empty bag....what is all this talk of visas for this girl, it is next to impossible, yet you continue to waste your time.....and our time....you asked for advice!!!
One day a girl sent me a similar email, saying that the travel agency had told her that the airfare would cost $800 and the visa $200. I replied showing her the official information from the US Embassy ($100 at the time) and showing her a cheaper airfare.
The result: she never again wrote me back ... I knew all along what she was after, but I wanted to see how far she would get before she got tired of failing with me :)
beemer does have a point, you have been told it's a scam, it's obviously a scam, you come back to ask us and we're all continuing to tell you it's a scam!
Think about it, she's offering to come to you and she doesn't even have a passport! Are you on drugs SoCO? She should never have offered to come to you without a passport, she should have insisted that you come to her because she couldn't come to you due no passport.
Wake up SoCO, she's doubling the cost of the visa, there ain't no way that a Russian passport costs $300, it's a bl00dy scam and you're getting drawn in!
Olga ..... how much does a Russian passport cost please?
Young man, it has always been customary fro a man to court a woman and quite probably will always be so. When you add the the fact that for the most part, economics makes travel easier from west to east. To keep the money irelevant go yourself to her home. Have her write a letter of invitation. I have, what my friends refer to rather irreverently refer to as, "Ordering out" by have a lady come to meet from Russia. She traveled to New York by her own means and bought her a ticket to the west coast of America. She spent 5 days here and when she left there was no bad feeling nor was there a oonnection. But never was there a expectation of sending money to the other, only 2 people hoping to find a spark however only having a nice week together.
"Old School" says have a nice trip,,,,,,,,, "New School" says have her call you when she gets to the airport.
That is only starters soco by the time you give up on her with all the other catastrophes that will befall her on the way to the airport you will have 3 grand in her. She will have to bribe the police, she will get robbed, her grandmother may die, and finally she will get sick so she will miss the plane but she would be happy to rebook for another 3 grand. Not to mention you might think of buying a spot in the airport to pitch your tent while you wait for her to come and take plenty of groceries if you have any money left.
I forgot to add something: no Russian girl I know will ever go to visit the man out of the blue ... unless she can pay for the trip herself. Serious Russian girls are too proud to ask a man for money for anything. If the man offers the trip as a gift, she will probably accept it. But never believe a girl who suddenly decides that she loves you so much that she has to go to visit you ... and needs your help to pay for the trip.
Also, in one experience I had, it was the travel agency and not the girl who tried to scam us. The travel agent wanted $1,000 to help my girl get a visa to Italy (based on how close to impossible it's for these girls to get a visa to Europe or USA). At the end we changed plans and I helped her get a visa to the UK without paying a dime to any travel agent. European visas are doable with the proper support from the man. USA visas can only be obtained if the girl has serious ties to her country (property, job, bank accounts, and/or University studies).
Olga: Thanks for the info on visas for Russian citizens to come here. I can now reasonably expect the passport price to have been doubled as well.
Martin: I'd give you kudos but it DIDN'T quite happen like that. No mention of an agency was ever made. Where she struck out was in refusing to call me even though I gave her my number twice (she said she didn't keep it the 1st time but I still gave benefit of the doubt), taking two or three letters to answer some basic questions, and finally insisting that she could get a visa without listing any site about it.
baron: Yep, from my lucking out and finding this board I was 'ware of that for awhile now and have been handling correspondence carefully. She finally asked for "help" paying for a trip in a letter today (one reason I hadn't been back to these boards in a few days was there really wasn't anything definitive to report until then).
beemer: In other threads here I said that it was my plan to go to her. The reasons being that a) as Rodan Tsunami puts it, I am "old school" and that is proper. b) It completely diffuses a scammer as there is nothing left for them to do at that point but own up. and c) It will make a really cool vacation for me when I manage to get everything lined up. Oh yes, d) I'm very patient and have done the online thing with American women before, I just needed yinz's advice for how to handle it with FSU girls because there are nuances I would never be familiar with (such as passports and visas). Sorry you feel I am wasting your time. I do not call anyone a liar without carefully vetting and until I was certain that she would provide no source to her claim I was willing to give rope. I appreciate your time in helping here.
FSULover: I didn't know, but it was a good learning experience.
Martin: Nope, not getting drawn in, (many thanks to yinz), just finding out some of the how-tos to draw out a scammer this time so that in the future I can be much more efficient.
Rodan Tsunami: Couldn't agree with you more on all counts.
Land of oz: Nyet. I paid careful attention to her emails and noted when she failed to respond to my queries. Further, I would not and could not send any money, being unemployed and a student, and I'm certain that any scammer would give up long before that.
FSULover: That's good to know about her pride. Further, beware of ANY woman who claims to love based solely on letters. It might be true, but most often is not.
All: Thank you very much for your help and expertise here. Time to plunge the line back into the water and hope for a better "bite" next time.
Do you have a killer introduction letter? If not, then take the time to get that. Write all about yourself. Then, very important, get it professionally translated. Do not use an online or software translator; have a real person do it. I can send you a link to the outfit I used. PM me if you want more insight.
Use reputable agencies or sites. I used Elenas Models and immediately began corresponding with real women.
Do not correspond until you are ready to travel to her country. If you are serious and are not inept at emails/phone calls/Skype sessions, within about 3 months of start of correspondence, you will have to travel. If you can not afford this yet, the do not waste their time corresponding. The real women have already made up their mind to find a partner and do not want a long email relationship.
If you do not have any money there is no use baiting your hook. You will just sour any women who are interested because you do not have the means to continue.
A 'killer' introduction letter, professionally translated, to write all about oneself!
That's funny, a professionally translated first letter, and the ladies won't suspect that it is a prepared 'canned' letter that is sent to any lady, many ladies, and wasn't written individually to her?
And, in previous discussions with these ladies, if a guy writes page after page, much of it talking about himself, then that is an immediate turn off, the guy is too full of himself, the first letter should be an initial introduction, just an introduction, and not a life story and it should be a maximum of the equivalent of one A4 page.
Land of oz: There is merit to what you say. I admit when I first began that my thinking was more along the lines of building a relationship first rather than go visit in what to me would be a hasty 3 months or so. My situation will be quite different six months from now and I was trying to do some strategic planning. The consensus of this forum suggests that FSU women are ready to move along much sooner than that and (apparently) leave quite a bit for interaction-as-they-go. I believe at this point I'll "go dormant" on the sites I've signed with and continue to peruse this forum and perhaps others as I find them so that I'll be better prepared when I'm within a more acceptable time-frame.
baron: I found the fee structure of Elenas not much to my liking (to be fair, that's my opinion of most of the sites I've perused so far and that, too, has me reevaluating). Further, I have to agree with Martin on this one: a "one-size-fits-all" letter simply isn't my style. The professional translation is probably a good idea, but I don't believe that doing so for an intro letter quite fits what I would be trying to get across, which is a more personal connection. Sometimes a few faults at the beginning show that you're genuine and at least trying.
SM, of course they know what the letter is and that it is being sent to many women.
What maybe you don't know is that there can be a big difference between translating from English to Russian and vice versa. So therefore rather than use the canned translation software, I opted for the professionally translated letter by someone with solid knowledge and understanding of both languages.
And I disagree. My long letter is not a bragging one; it contains short summaries of the topics that I listed. No bragging just stating key points.
And I also disagree about the NEED for the intro letter to be short. What many, like maybe you, fail to understand is that everyone, including you are writing short little intro letters. Mine is not like yours. It is that way on purpose, so that the lady takes notice of mine besides all the short little letters she always gets.
What I can say is that for me, my intro letter worked like a champ. I had quite a few women respond with interest and mentioning exactly that the size and content (that is key, no bragging) made them take immediate notice.
There is no one right way to go about this folks, regardless of what many experts may insist.
It did what it was supposed to do, make them take immediate notice and interest.
SOCO, I would agree. If $99 for three months and 50 emails is out of your budget, then this international dating scene is not for you.
And yes if you are really not ready to be serious and ready to commit, then you should stay out of the scene. Nothing personal meant.
Yes Martin knows all. I have given you solid advice. You will hear many with the same thoughts as him. Just ask yourself one question: Do I want to be like all the other men writing to the women? Do I want to be lost in the crowd? Or, Do I want to be noticed?
Trust me, there are many very good guys also writing to these ladies, except for Martin, you'll blend in nicely.
And don't forget, You Never Get a Second Chance to make a First Impression
So show those faults in the beginning and you'll go far. Just my opinion. I am no expert, I only can speak of my experiences.
Let's say you receive letter(s), what is the first thing you do? You look at the photo(s) of course and if the photo(s) are not pleasing to your eye, bearing in mind that you could have an inbox full of letters, then the chances that person's letter will ever be read, before being deleted, are minimal.
So, the first letter is an introduction whilst sending one's photo(s), no matter what one writes if she doesn't like the photo(s) then she's not going to respond. Also, if she has an inbox full of letters, which is quite likely, she wants to be in a position to scan read them, to quickly read them, before deciding to, perhaps pay to per page to, have them printed to take home with her, if some guy is waffling on, page after page, then that might be another reason his letter might head for the delete button.
Also bear in mind that many ladies pay for translation, perhaps per word or per page, if one's letter is, let us say, three pages and another guy's letter is one page, as perhaps a cash struck single mother which one would you pay to have printed/translated?
But everyone to their own, one goes with what one feels is right so it's not worth 'fighting' over!