I wonder if the rest of us are as patient and thoughtful in this process.
I guess it is something you gain over time and experience.
You keep your brain above the belt huh. I guess it saves the bucks in the end.....and wasted time.
She has that something that I keep going back to but don't want to get burned. If she was desperate to leave, then I guess she'd be married by now.
Thanks again for your input.
It's reassuring to get good advice for the more experienced... we newbies need all the help we can get!
My thoughts....
1) I can't imagine a lady ever leaving her child behind even if in late teens
2) There are no pro's and con's.....lady should bring her child with her, I would definately
be in favor. Correct me if I am wrong, I think maybe cooper didn't bring his wife's child.
Becoming a family should include yours and her children.
3) It is probably easier to raise a child when they are around 6-8 range. A friend married a russian lady with a 14 year old girl, by the time she was 18, that girl was became a wedge in the marrige and nonchalant about exposing herself. Biggest problem was the wifes catering to the girl's feeling all the time, she could do no wrong. Terrible parenting.
About children, this is a big topic for me. I'm open to marrying a woman with a child (not more than one, but that is rare anyway in FSU). But it's a big deal, not to be done lightly. My considerations:
1) By Russian and Ukrainian law, a child cannot (there being some exceptions) become a resident of a foreign country without the father's permission. If he will not consent, the problems can be big and tangled: it can be the show-stopper. This is an important question to explore in the early days.
2) Quality of relationship with the child is important. Step-parenting is often tough anyway. If a child and step-dad have a difficult chemistry, this can greatly impair or kill the marriage (I've seen this multiple times here in the U.S.).
3) My preference is for younger children (right down to infancy), I think there are better prospects to forge a strong family. Beyond about 8 years old, I think that the challenges increase. And while I would consider a woman with a teenager, I would be really cautious about this - for myself, I would have to feel that I have some good feeling and communication with this kid, and to believe that the boy or girl could be psychologically prepared for the tough task of saying goodbye to all friends and moving into a new language and culture. This is serious!
4) If a woman were willing to leave behind a child who is not already working or at university, then she is not my type.
Your number 1, Durak. You should be able to pay him off, right? My gf told me it's no problem with the child's father, but I see that as a possibility. He is not involved anyway. She has a 13 year old. I guess a big challenge ahead of me, if I can pull this through.
'Your number 1, Durak. You should be able to pay him off, right? My gf told me it's no problem with the child's father, but I see that as a possibility.'
Pay him off? As I have heard many times, price may start at $2-3 thousand and can easily go past
$10,000. The problem only arises when girl goes to ask for signature to release rights. Being involved has no bearing on the situation. In my original search, I stayed away from girls with child/children because of horror stories I read about...it can get nasty. Current girl I am seeing has a very, very young child and one of first questions we talked about was her child being able to leave country easily.....I didn't want to get into a bidding war. Hopefully with no official marriage.....no father's rights.
By the way RB...I thought you were through here..........
I think we're getting awya from the topic here.
Although I would say that Duraks post is very thoughtful.
RB and Beem make good points too.
Original topic is:- is the woman serious?
I'm interested in seeing where this one goes. A sort of stake in it since I corresponded with this woman before.
Beemer...I remember a while ago you asked me about a woman I considered drop dead gorgeous and you think you may have known her...well this is her.
I wouldn't pay past $500. It is $500 more than he had before. My gf's marriage was dissolved in 2005. I am not sure if she was married to the child's father. Hmmm.....
Kirk.....this is not the women I know, this one is very pretty too.
I can see your point Kirk. It could be this girl is in it for the attention with maybe no intention of leaving Belarus. A girl I once knew from latvia was similar with the attention she got, she told me she was on many sites because her chance of finding her beloved would increase, she had a point...
RB, if your limit is really $500, you may be in for a big surprise. Apparently your gf and child are not worth much, huh? I doubt if marriage dissolved changes legal rights for child. Sounds like you are unsure RB about if girl was married to actual father or just married another guy?????
Girl I am seeing has no father on birth certificate...guess he was long gone by then, not sure about legal ramifications though.
The thread originally started when I became curious as to how the personal contact details for Anja Menshykava could be so easily and cheaply available...along with all the other ladies on russianbrides.com.au (That's the gal Kirkland had been talking too sometime ago.)
How does the website make their money if they give those details up for $59 first and only payment for a whole year. Looks too good to be true or just really bad business. One could easily phone all the girls listed in one year...where's the profit for the company?! Good for us nonetheless.
How does the lady live and work if they have over 100 men calling her all day and night?!
Did anyone call her on the number I posted to see if she was legit? I must have missed posts somewhere cause it sounds like Kirkland's former muse Anja, is being sought after by someone else...this is of interest to me too because of that Aussie twit trying to woo her. unless I got that wrong?
I'm looking through EM, Fiance and Club 10. Hopefully there's some genuine gals there. I'm a bit dubious though. I'm reading all the posts here and digesting what I can before I start any contact.
I noticed someone posted another forum on another thread. Will that give me info that I won't get here? Or are they much of a muchness? It looks like there's a wave of us newbies coming through. I'm glad I'm not the only on asking all the questions.
"Girl I am seeing has no father on birth certificate...guess he was long gone by then, not sure about legal ramifications though."
According to a Ukrainian friend (who was depressed to realize she couldn't leave Ukraine, because her ex will never give consent), there is no obstacle if the father's name is NOT on the birth certificate. Obviously, this is not sound legal advice, but she had investigated the matter, and this was her understanding.
My gf was married to another guy who was not her daughter's father. That marriage lasted five years and ended in 2005. Her daughter is now 13 and I don't know if she was married to her father. Beemer, I hate to waste money. I would rather spend the money on her than being blackmailed.
"How does the lady live and work if they have over 100 men calling her all day and night?!"
How do you know it is her that answers? (Baron555)
I guess Kirkland can answer that question, because he did speak to her. Did he believe that this was the girl in the profile? Did he get the same girl every time? He did seem to suggest that this girl seemed as if she wanted out of her country.
I guess the only way to know would be for him to call her again and see if she is the same voice as before. Are you talking call centres with many ladies or someone representing the profile.
When someone is calling the lady multiple times.. e.g every day, you would notice if it was someone different on the phone...surely.
I thought personal phone numbers would be free from fraud????
Mr Searching; in answer to your question as to whether or not I was sure it was the girl in the photos I was talking to…I don’t know.
I’m pretty sure I would know here voice again if I called her. But I won’t be calling her again for reasons mentioned before.
It’s such a minefield out there that any hint of subterfuge and I’m gone. I’m too old for playing games and so is she.
As for call centres…nope…this woman was at home or at someone’s home….I could hear normal everyday stuff. in the background…including her sons voice.
It used to be I would try get them on cam to see who I was talking to. But then decided if I needed to see them on cam I didn’t trust them enough to be bothered continuing. I usually waited for them to make the offer. Most of the women I eventually went to see I saw on cam first.
If a woman is interested, she’ll meet you on Skype, Yahoo or whatever at your request, she’ll give you her email address, or phone number at your request. She’ll send you a text in the morning to ask you to wake up and call her.
If they don’t… something amiss. If a woman wants to correspond with you she’ll make the effort.
I don’t know why guys bother purchasing a woman’s details when the woman hasn’t even shown interest in contacting you first.