I am new to this site and meeting CIS women. I have been corresponding with several ladies from the same city. Due to the time and cost I thought it would be the best method of meeting the ladies I was interested in and that was interested in me. I make a good living but do not want to endlessly search or chase for the right person. I realize that only by meeting can we decide if their is chemistry for us to pursue a relationship. My thought was to meet each of the ladies where there appeared to be mutual interest and then select the lady that seems the best match. After reading several comments I have begun to question my plan. If I go and their is no chemistry then I will have wasted the time and my find myself in a city killing time. However, if I do decide on this approach should I tell the ladies before hand. I think it only fair. I do not want to mislead anyone and I do not want to make excuses for my departure that is not true. I am an honest person and that would be difficult for me. What are other peoples experiences in this matter. Not certain if it matters but the city is Kharkov.
Yes your plan is fraught with disaster. Why can't you determine before you leave which of the ladies is the ONE?
Answer the question.
If you can not, then you are not ready to travel. How would you feel if the lady were to visit you, but just for a day because she needed to visit other men to determine which was best?
Answer the question, how would you feel? If you'd feel pretty rotten, then what do you think they would feel?
When you are ready to be serious, get serious and go meet one. You can only have one wife. Sri, but fact.
When I went one time, I picked one and told the other I may visit her, I may not. The other lady seemed anxious to meet me, but she never heard from me again.
You are in “ The no win scenario “!!! or, Damned if you do,,, damned if you don’t!! I have done it both ways; Told everyone weeks before my trip, that I was going to visit several cities, and I would not make any decisions until I had seen everyone! But also, that I needed to be a perfect gentleman because of this!!
I was only planning to meet, not to “test drive”!! Half did not show up!!! (I did not say; “test drive” to them!!) lol
And,,,, I planned a trip around one person! I had wrote to her for 18 months during a 24 month period! (she vanished for 6 months) When I came to meet her, she knew very little about me, and after 2 - 2 hour dates, she decided we were not “soul-mates” !! As a backup plan, I had started to write to someone from the neighboring city, and I had told her; that I might be flying over!! I had her email address, I sent her an email that same night! She sent a reply saying; She would be happy to meet with me, and would be waiting for me!! I sent her another one in the morning, and one when I arrived!!! She did not show up!!! Instead, I found her online chatting at 11:00pm!
My best advice is;,,, Try to determine, which one is the most sincere?? If a letter is too good to be true, it probably isn’t true!! It has been my experience, that a liar can tell a lie, better than an honest person can tell the truth!! Some of the letters you have been getting,,, may not have come from the sweet girl in the picture, but rather, a translator or agency, getting paid by piece work!!!
Does she ask the right questions??? Does she want to learn about your family, your work, your hobbies?? Or does she just write; pillow talk, to keep the letters coming!?? It’s very easy to get caught up in provocative or racy letters, but you need to learn some cold hard facts about each other too!! Does she resist answering the difficult or personal questions??
Oh,,,,, I’m new to the forum, but not new,,,, “unfortunately “ to the foreign dating! In February, it will be four years! And at this moment, I am back to square one!!
And this has been my;,,,,, two cents!!
hey gator,, yeah i did this on my first trip,, i quickly found it to be a bad idea for my future trips..
but saying this, for my first trip it was a good way to learn fast the ins and outs of this game so i wouldn't change a thing of my beginnings.
i think i organized six, but not all in same city, that would be to much:) most was two per city.
doing such in the beginnings you will get partly pulled into the game of players takers time wasters, you will get wise to the basic scams quickly...
as big as Kharkov is you will still find the interpreters will possibly discuss with the different girls what you are doing with their thoughts of you.
so you will have to be honest, which will make some of them feel a bit like meat,, not all,, but not all think logically.
as in you not wanting an endless search,, "well mate" there's just as many head cases there,,, "so arrr well" maybe you should stay home:))
my advice is dont take the first trip around the girls to seriously, use it to learn about the place and people..
personally i wouldn't touch Ukraine again,, Russia is far better, but Ukraine is without a dealt the best place to start.
I was in the same situation where I would only meet one girl at a time. I would meet the girl you are most interested in first then maybe you will not need to meet the other girls. or narrow it down to one then if that goes bad have the local agency set up a meeting with another lady. when I went to meet one lady we decided it wasn't what we wanted so I had the agency set up another date. for some reason they set up 2 but only charged me for one. I met both and the interpreter made up an excuse as to why I had to leave. I had a good time with the second lady but the first one was the one I liked.
The times I went there to meet more than one girl, it was always a disaster. Nothing good came out of it (and I also felt really bad).
The times I went to visit only one girl I had a great time and very positive results. Eventually I met my wife this way. I risked a whole trip for her, and we both won.