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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > They Can Change Author Post jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 1:59:31 PM   I read quite a few posts in this forum (and written a few) about the wonders of Russian women. But I feel its only fair to warn - that things can change radically from how you thought that they were. I dated a Russina woman (a Lithuanian actually) three and a half years ago. She was in America on a Tourist Visa and she was incredible. She was the most beautiful and wondeful woman I had ever know and it was she who inspired me - not to settle for a western woman. She convinced me to look to Eastern Europe. She was mannered and appreciative of eveyr little thing I did. When I would telephone her she would send me a Thank You note. She was reasy to do anything at any time I chose. I could go on and on. On our one-month anniversary of dating I gave her a little silver heart pendant. The way she acted, you would have thought that I had given her the Hope Diamond. I paid about $10 for it - but she treasured it and wore it proudly everytime I saw her after that. Eventually we stopped seeing each other - but as I mentioned I never forgot her or her ways. We kept in contact by email - and when I mentioned that I had never forgotten her and intended to go to Ukraine to find someone with her qualities again, she told me that she would like to see me again. I was thrilled and we started making arrangements. Somewhere around that time - I happen to be cruising the internet and I happen to find a picture, a limited edition print actually, done by a known artist. It depicted a vase of her favorite yellow flowers along with a teapot that looked exactly like one that she owned. I thought it beautiful a was a perfect "hello gift" so I bought it and had it framed, spent a couple hundred dollars (not a whole lot but enough)and had it sent to her. No Thank You card. No nothing. I did happen to ask her mother if she had received it and dicovered that she had. After we had dated a couple of times (and already I knew that she had changed) I asked about the picture. She told me that she had given it to a friend - becasue it was not very interesting and that I had no taste. A little surprised,Iasked her what exatly it was that she did not like about the picture. She told me that she only likes "original works of art" not prints - and that she would not accepts such gifts in the future. We didn't date long after that. Though she was the same person I had dated - she wasn't the same at all. Into every women's movement you can think of and every fad diet and excercise program - she was western and materialistic in every way imaginable. So I kept my original plans and went to Ukraine. Be aware - exposure to our western "culture" can change them - and not necessarily for the better. Thunderdome Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 2:50:38 PM   Jet, you twat! You sent her a pic of YELLOW flowers?????? And you also expect her to be pleased with that? No wonder - yellow flowers mean in Russia bad things. Maybe no problem when you give them in person because they can sense your meaning/intentions, but sending a rather permanent pic displaying them ... is not very clever. jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 3:16:44 PM   Thunder - I have to admit I sometimes forget about the significance associated with such things. Having been exposed to our culture, now for three years, I believe she would have been aware that we hold no such meaning for that particular thing. She also showed me what works of art WERE acceptable. They were in the $10,000 range. I'm not a pauper - but likewise I can't afford $10,000 for a "hello gift". jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 3:18:00 PM   Refresh my memory. What exactly does a vase of yellow fresia on a table with a teapot mean, Thunder? jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 3:40:48 PM   Thunder - Check out the website "Present To Russia" at http://www.russian-flower-shop.com/useful.html There is says that giving a woman yellow flowers means "Joy and Friendship". Not exactly the "bad things" you describe. Thunderdome Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 6:43:40 PM   Olga, please let's hear it from a Russian lady? (She'll probably respond on Monday ... Hey Oleg, you also know?) TimH Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/28/2004 6:48:09 PM   In a lot of Russia yellow is regarded as the death or funeral flower, but times they are a changin to quote Dylan, and it is becoming accepted for its beauty and far less conected with the whole death thing as it used to be. Just dont send even numbers !! Thats suposed to be real bad luck !!! Not than Im superstitious or anything :o) Ooooops, almost walked under that black cat again, trying to avoid that laddder crossing my path !!! Thunderdome Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 4:04:56 AM   "Refresh my memory" I can't Jet, sorry, haven't seen the print either. Indeed even numbers are out, and I dunno if the Daisy's were clearly 'countable'? However, yellow really is - still! - an insult, at least if you mean well. Yeah, it will change probably, but quite likely as quick as them having faith in a bank for instance. This kind of detail, deeply embedded in their culture, has a habit of changing over generations only, with remnants of them remaining probably. You presented this print to her 3 years ago, her being in Russia hence to be displayed there. These facts added caused me to really lift both eyebrows Jet, never mind what she had/liked in the US. That website lies through it's teeth in any case. Yellow Roses mean (in OUR culture) either Jealousy or a luke-warm feeling only, lightyears removed from Red's, and overthere they mean no well. Basically, if sent as a goodbeye-bouquet yellow would be the ONLY choice! Oh, and don't forget to make it an even number then, that's terminal. Yeah Jet, some site's also offer a (1/2)dozen roses, praying on your culture and gullibleness both. Don't, rather do your homework. But in any case I would appreciate a 'verdict' of Olga/Oleg, but I hunch they're off for the weekend. dma Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 7:55:02 AM   seems like a decapitated horse's head would have more appeal than yellow flowers. There seems more to it than just the colour given that cost was mentioned in addition to it being her favourite in spite of tradition; when you know the person better it should be easier to make those kind of judgements. I wouldn't even contemplate a $10K hello gift to Britney Spears even if I thought 'i was in there' nor one I would accept one in return...if you're reading Britney ;-) Turboz Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 8:23:25 AM   Judging by her performance with Madonna a while back (the kiss) I wouldn't be suprised if she does actually stop by here to try and find that perfect FSU woman! And as for marriage, well we all know how quick she'll do that one... jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 11:40:59 AM   For the record, by the way, there were fifteen yellow flowers pictured, something I pointed out to her in my letter, as well as my awareness of the importance that it be an odd number. I should also point out, that some time earlier she had announced to me that yellow fresia was her favoite flower, but in context of the above discussion there is more to the story. And its something I cringe about as I recall. She had worked in America as a live-in caretaker for an elderly woman of 94 years. After a period of 2+ years the elderly woman passed away. My lady disclosed to me her passion for yellow fresia whe she mentioned that she bought a big bouquet of it to place on her EMPLOYER'S GRAVE. I remembered the story - but somehow the connection with "good-bye" or even death eluded me (DUH!!). As I said, I cringe when I remember this, and realise now how she might not have liked getting a picture of it on a table, along with just a teapot. The imagery is now obvious. jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 11:59:41 AM   The exact phrase she used to describe the painting was "bad taste". No kidding. It was a downward view of just a teapot (empty?) and a vase of flowers (yellow fresia) on a table with a single place setting. Its like the death of the elderly woman revisited. TimH Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 12:38:09 PM   When you describe the picture as you do now in more detail mate, its obvious why it upset her, but then again, she should also realise the difference in cultures and cut you some slack too !!! TimH Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 12:41:59 PM   The obvious answer to this problem is Send Red flowers and be damn sure they are an uneven number :o))) In the UK roses are in 1/2 or dozens, its perfectly normal, and if a Russian man sent a UK woman 11 she would almost certainly ask "Where is the 12th one?" And knowing UK women, probably wanna know where the keys to the Ferrari that goes with them is !!!! But my main point, is that Everyone must make allowances for one screw up !!! If you make a mistake once thats forgivable, but twice !! Thats just dumb :o))) Never make the same mistake twice, there are millions of new ones available :o))) Thunderdome Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 1:02:02 PM   So Jet, you're going over anyway. What about re-visiting a good thing? A good start would be to send for the 8th some red one's out of the blue ;-))) Face to face is immeasurably better than any other way, and giving her the surprise of her life by plain pitching up.... Hard to beat Jet, or will that be heart to beat? jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 1:22:45 PM   Thunder: The woman I refer to above is still in the US. There were other mistakes made (a few of the millions possible you refer to). One that I made and a much bigger one that she made very soon after the above mentioned incident (you wouldn't believe it). The details are too personal to discuss in a public forum. I did send roses. More than once. To no avail. I have moved on - as has she. In two months I visit Moldova and a new situation. jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 1:30:11 PM   Knowing that the rose count should always be odd - I once asked her if she would prefer to get 11 (which seems "cheap") or 13 (which is considered to be an unlucky number in Russian, just as it is here). She opted for 13 so that is what I sent her - always. I notice, however, that online gift services for the FSU offer quatities of 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, 15, 17,..... They ONLY offer odd numbers of course, and they skip "13" as an option. TimH Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 2:07:29 PM   Many Russians have told me that 13 is their lucky number, gotta say I havnt figured out why no 13 roses oprion either !!! Maybe Olga can help to clarify it for us, if she ever comes back that is :o)) And the way things are going, with everyone needing stuff clarified I wouldnt blame her for keeping stum and not letting us know she is back ;o))) dragster Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 10:30:24 PM   yellow flowers are fine........the worst combination is red and white together....THAT is commonly used to signify death or loss. jetmba. Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 2/29/2004 11:15:09 PM   Is Chipster back? Your Reply: Your name:   New Registration Password:   Forgot password?   refresh Code:   Russian brides > Main Forum > They Can Change
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