@ Disillusion. All your advice is excellent, and common sense really. I'm sure you have had some fascinating experiences while interpreting during meetings! I agree it is far better (and normal) to meet people while travelling, than through the Internet, although this may not be easy for the time-poor, and some may find it difficult to approach a stranger in some of your suggested examples, an exhibition, for example. But I think some of the non-agency sites can be a useful additional method to finding someone, who we can hope is at least single - and open to a relationship with a foreigner.
Absolutely agree, Disillusion, that it's so important to understand the culture and general mentality of Ukrainian girls (and society). I'm engaged to be married to a girl here and I STILL am learning and getting use to Ukrainian girls' mentalities. And been here for 6 months out of the last 18 or so, as well. It's very different than the girls back in USA, in many ways (and I'm not saying it's bad either). But, most importantly, we have to understand and respect the differences. Maybe we don't agree with some things but have to understand and respect it. For example, my fiance told me that it's the man (and his family) who pays and plans for the whole wedding. I was very surprised, as in USA both sides take part in it, especially the planning part (in USA it's a woman's dream to plan her own wedding!). But I respect this...it's just the way things are done here. Understanding and respect towards different mentalities and cultural traits goes a long way toward a healthy relationship :).
And about VK, most Ukrainian girls have VK, even if they're inactive for a while. I'd say probably over 80% have a profile. Russians even more maybe. But Ukrainians less active than them on VK, I've noticed, with some preferring Facebook. But, I'm sure there's many cases of communicating with a "girl" through an agency and then finding "her" on her VK page...and her not having a clue who you are ;).
I have just asked the question, to my love interest, about who orgnanises a wedding in the Ukraine as I ma thinking of getting married there (if she or another lady wants to). She told me it is the girl's family who does it all. Maybe they expect the man to pay or contribute. But it makes complete sense to me that the girl's family organises the event. The man and his family are not likely to be able to do it to her liking.
Juffles,
Yes there is a risk that the lady can find out that a dirt-bag is investigating her but then one should not employ an incompetent dirt-bag. A 'proper' investigator should not be discovered and he can save you a lot of money, time and heartache with a good checking of the girl. But then, where to find a 'proper' investigator.
You assume wrongly that what makes the difference about having a problem going to meet a lady is the distance to her. I run two businesses and have to look after my children half of their time. Believe you me, I cannot just say to people here, I am just going to travel for 10 days, you sort things out here. And if the lady is no good, then do it again and again. Plus every penny spent on a trip to see a lady who may be no good is a penny that does not reach my children.
I would not go to art galleries, bars, museums and other places in the Ukraine to try and pick up a Ukrainian lady for the simple reason that the great majority of them are not interested in meeting and marrying some older Westerner and they are not interested in going to his country either. In fact, many of them take offence and I have read comments in Facebook by Russian and Ukrainian girls who are p*ssed off with foreigners assuming that they are game and available to them, especially the attractive ones. They hate romantic approaches by foreign men.
I just go directly to the places (dating agencies) where the women make it clear that it is a foreigner they want to meet, marry and go to his country.
It isn't that they don't want to meet a foreigner and marry. It is that you still have to do the courting. In the way are all the others she has communicated with. The industry average, I am told is 5% of the men actually visit. If you visit, it is likely that she is communicating with at least a dozen more. You maybe the only one who will visit. You maybe the best of the bunch. But, if a few more promised to visit her, she will probably want to meet them also.
It is the job of the agency women to lure you into visiting. It seems clear that the woman wants to marry and come to your country when she communicates with you online. However when you meet, it is a brand new ball game.
"I just go directly to the places (dating agencies) where the women make it clear that it is a foreigner they want to meet, marry and go to his country."---best approach unless you have a long term mision in-country, other than a romantic relationship.
“However when you meet, it is a brand new ball game.” In part, because meeting online in not as meeting in person (in the flesh).so you THINK she have many other pretenders, mostly online (you should not pay attention to it, unless you are 100% sure she playing you). If you’re a business man, you should know that this GAME is a bit more risky, and investigating a woman’s heart, will only drive you insane. Not just because of women are a different species but because like SKY said “that it's so important to understand the culture and general mentality of Ukrainian girls [ FSU girls (and society) ]. I'm engaged to be married to a girl here and I STILL am learning and getting use to Ukrainian girls' mentalities. And been here for 6 months out of the last 18 or so, as well. It's very different than the girls back in USA, in many ways (and I'm not saying it's bad either). But, most importantly, we have to understand and respect the differences. Maybe we don't agree with some things but have to understand and respect it.” If there is any real gamblers, I meant… wife seekers heading out to FSU, I hope you had dealt with the queen of hearts. But as we all had mentioned, have a backup plan, ther so many other nice things to do in Ukraine.
I can’t argue too much about WS’s first paragraph,, if you don’t care for art, opera, ballet, etc,, don’t search for a wife there! Makes sense. But the last sentence,,,,, that’s a different story.
WS:
“I just go directly to the places (dating agencies) where the women make it clear that it is a foreigner they want to meet, marry and go to his country.”
It’s been the consensus of the forum for quite a while now, that the agencies are not the place to look!! They have very few women that are looking for anything honest or sincere, and are just there for employment.,,, for the money!
Why would WS say otherwise?? Because he is danny, and danny had no problem posting misinformation on the forum,,,, as long as it was opposite and contrary to the truth, or more importantly to him,,, to my opinion.
Poppy?:
“Thanks wifeseeker”
A new profile popping up to say thanks for the misinformation???
ragingbull, I do not know if you mean that Ukrainian women in general are prepared to meet a foreigner, marry him and go to his country. In fact, only a very small proportion of women over there have the intention to do so, and the great majority of them are in a dating site. I am in contact with a girl who tells me that foreigners never go to her town as there are no tourist attractions or businesses that attract foreigners. What are the chances of her meeting a foreigner like that?
You are referring to the men who get easily scammed, like lonely, and who utilise the services of agencies that organise trips, correspondence, accommodation, gifts, video and translation for men who register with them. I only use agencies that charge me to have access to the profile and messaging to the ladies. I do all the rest and never pay for any extra services.
lonely, your level of stupidity and paranoia have become too much to even bother to answer to your arguments. You need to do two things: first seek therapy and second abandon all your involvement in seeking an FSU wife and coming to these forums as these things are really affecting your sanity. Add that to a low intellectual level and you have a recipe for disaster. THis is my honest advice to try and help you in this difficult time for you.
"In fact, only a very small proportion of women over there have the intention to do so, and the great majority of them are in a dating site."
I said you still need to do the courting.
"I am in contact with a girl who tells me that foreigners never go to her town as there are no tourist attractions or businesses that attract foreigners."
She maybe discouraging you to visit her town. People talk. To prevent gossip, they usually don't want you to visit their home town, unless it is in secret. In other words, do not go out.
Of course you have to do the courting and it is more complicated than with a woman of your own town. There is no such thing as a 'mail order bride'
I do not read 'scammer' into everything a girl tells me, she is actually inviting me to go to her town. She just does not like the place where she lives. Since she is looking for a foreign husband that will take her abroad, it stands to reason.
With lonely all you have to do is insert a coin and press a button, he will do the rest.
My point is even if she is a "scammer", or she is not looking to leave her country, you still can court. The word scammer is overused here in the forum. Yes, many of them want you to buy them beautiful things. The relationship may turn sour. It does not mean she didn't give you a chance.
I have stayed in two ladies homes. The first one did not introduce me to her friends or family. The second introduced me to her family, but not her friends. When a certain visitor came, she lied about who I was. The third one, we stayed at hotels. She explained to me about gossiping.
Maybe she is inviting you to her town. Many do not want to take the risk of being found out.