“Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it”.
Rick: “My ex wife was a materialistic b***h”
Rick, have noticed what you write about in 70 to 80% of your posts?? All of your material things! Your apartment that cost 25,000USD,,,, your unfinished house for 8,000,,, etc, ect, etc! You keep touting your own accomplishments, like it’s all you have in life?!! Is it any coincidence, that you attracted a “ materialistic b***h” for a wife??
I don’t know why you feel the need to brag amongst a group of men like you do,,, but I can only imagine what you are like with a group of women,,, or children.
If money and things are your greatest or only asset,,, then you will only find another “materialistic b***h” for a second wife.
Most guys here want to avoid that,,, like the plague!! But when you keep telling the guys,,, not to be penny pinchers, or tightwads,,,, you are implying that they be more like you, and less like themselves. Another recipe for disaster.
Guys need to be themselves when looking for a mate, in order to have a union with some harmony. I know that I don’t want some money hungry bloodsucking bitch from hell as a mate.
Sure,, spending more time and money gives a guy a better chance,,,, but he needs to keep that up when she arrives to his home,,,, and what if he can’t???
When you’re talking about your ex,,, you sound a little bitter?? Did she bankrupt you?? No one here wants to go through that!
My advice to men making the trip is to,,,, don’t be a schmuck, but don’t be a phony either. Improve your wardrobe a little, but don’t go out and buy 800USD suits if you never wear suits at home.
you are missing the point, LR. I see inaccurate information here quite often. I mention the price of things because some here mention prices for things that are highly inaccurate. mentioning that an apartment costs 25k is not to brag about it but to make sure people know that it is quite affordable to live in Ukraine. A poster questioned if a 26k apartment had a roof while most normal people in Ukraine know that it is a normal price for a quite decent place in either Nikolaev or Kherson or virtually any city outside Kiev or Kharkov, especially in Lviv or other western cities and towns.
$8000 comment references that it is possible to find incredible deals in villages if you are handy or speak well enough to hire locals to finish a house for you.
How is it bragging to relay important information and to correct myths spoken on this forum on a daily basis? I spend alot of money here because ITS MY JOB to distribute money and give people economic opportunity and assist families and children so they are healthy and happy.
As you know, there is a crisis in Ukraine. people need help. They need coats, boots and even food to eat. You know one thing you dont see very much of compared to when you were coming here a few years ago? children begging on the streets. Up through about 3 or 4 years ago one could not eat outside at a cafe without having at least one or more kids come up to you asking for money or food. It still happens on occasion but alot of people have come to Ukraine to change that. We have changed laws and opened dozens of shelters, foster homes and really made a difference.
Im not saying that men need to blow their wad in Ukraine to win a girl's heat but there appears to be more than a few cheap asses who whine about every kopek they spend. By living much of a year in Ukraine it is possible to discover how to spend smart, make a good impression on people and not go broke doing it.
If anything, perhaps a thread that we can use here is how to explain to guys considering coming for the first time or even 10th time is how to become wise to how things work, where and how to shop and maybe post resources men can take advantage of so they DONT keep getting ripped off. There is a big learning curve for becoming a regular visitor looking for a wife and doing it smart. not cheaply or expensively but in the proper and normal way of Ukraine, even for a foreigner.
one doesnt have to spend 800UAH on roses if a man wants to buy. they can be had for half of the "regular price"
one doesnt have to spend even $50 bucks to take a girl to a very nice restaurant to impress her on a first or second date.
one can learn that for a 3rd or forth date that preparing a meal at your apartment for both of you can impress her greatly.
one needs to understand that 60 or 70UAH is NOT alot to pay for a taxi and shows you are a gentleman. so what if SHE is thrifty
and decides to keep half the money and take the bus? she is being responsible with that money because she makes 10% of what you do.
one can learn that its not how much you spend on her but on how and where you spend money to achieve a greater effect with less.
one can learn that a genuine girl does want you to buy her a little something if you go walking at the mall but she will not try
to clean out your wallet in the process. Its the thought that counts, just like in US.
I may come off harsh to men here because I look at them the same way a Ukrainian looks at them. Thats why I am always preaching
about learning the culture, at least making an effort to learn their language because Im always noticing the pleasant reaction of
lots of people when they discover that Ive made an effort to learn Russian. Being in the village and more rural middle Ukraine in past 2 years, I have discovered that learning Ukrainian has become a priority as there is a stigma attached to you when you cant at least say some things, like basic greetings, etc in Ukrainian.
The reality is, LR, is Im not getting a kick over daily arguments with you over stupid sh*t. I just think you are super negative and
that apparently comes from bad experiences. But not everyone wants to hear all the negativity.
I want guys to come to Ukraine and not fall for all the traps and BS that does exist. Yes, there are lots of "ms wows" and I can understand
that men can be blinded by the beautiful girls and those coming here for the first or even 4th time can easily be distracted and taken off
their game. Some can be fooled by promises made by agencies and pro daters. I WANT GUYS TO AVOID THAT!!!!
I absolutely love it when American guys come to visit and I get to meet them because I love to show them the Ukraine that I know. All the things they otherwise will never experience because they are blinded by the agency engineered dating scene and by the feeling that they need
to play the "numbers game" and meet 12 girls hoping one might be legit when probably none of them are.
I want them to know how its possible to spend a whole month here without blowing their budget, meet real girls, experience things from the girl's perspective and increase their odds of finding "the one"
"why would a Ukrainian girl....or any girl want such a boring person???"
This is what I sometimes pose to the people who I contact. I do not socialize very much and am not athletic and am not very immersed in going to balls, concerts, parties, resorts, theaters, events, etc. Lifestyle expectations are a big deal.
Some of them do respond that they will "change" my lifestyle or are OK with it because I will not stray away from them.
Rick,,, I can appreciate a civil approach, instead of your normal insulting retort, but I feel that you are only doing it to cover your ass!
You seem to have a problem with my honesty! Any time you are questioned about your actions in Ukraine,,, you respond with insults or threats! Not the actions of an honest person!
Have you read your own posts from yesterday??
Rick: “No WS, he doesnt have time to looking for you, he is spending all his time following me. He thinks by blocking me I cant use another profile to see how big a loser he is in life. he claims to have had girlfriends but I dont see any evidence of it on facebook or VK in 3 years.”
Do you know what an “inactive” profile is?? I keep my Vk profile for the music, I’ve only wrote to 4 people on Vk this year,,, and two of them are on the 4um.
As for fb,,, I posted a photo of a girlfriend once!! And got a bunch of “unwanted” attention,,,, a lot of;,,, Hey Baby,,,, whatcha doing tonight “crap”! I pulled her photo in less than 24 hours!!! I don’t need to display girlfriend’s photos to stroke my own ego!!
I keep my online life separate from my personal life! I blocked my own family members,,, my hometown and my high school!! The closest fb friend is 60 miles away!!
No evidence in 3 years?? So you’ve been stalking me?? By your, WS and danny’s definition, you’ve been stalking me!!
I think you are a liar!! You’ve had since last year Aug - Sept, when this,,,,, dating 15 years olds thing started, to block me on Vk,,,, and you haven’t??!! You’ve called me: short, fat, and bald! Well,,, I have news for you Rick,,, I’m not short, fat or bald!! And you just might remember me saying last year,,, “Well if I’m fat,,, then you’re fat too?!!!” I think everyone here will believe me, when I say, that I HAVE seen your profile!
Rick: “I really dont care what you think Looney. using a separate profile I can still see you're not doing anything special or constructive.
basically spend your life in humdrum world of hours on forums, watching TV and some work. NO FUN GUY. why would a Ukrainian girl....or any girl want such a boring person???”
More insults, name calling and lies!! Hours on forums?? Normally minutes,,, except when I need to dispute the BS from the likes of you, WS and danny!
How does it feel to be in the same category as Danny???? Must sting a little??!!
On to your post from today, 12/22/14
I have no problem with posting the proper price of things,,, but you only do it to lure in prospects for yourself,,, and we are not suppose to do self promotion on the 4um.
Do you even realize how much “self promotion” you have done in the last 24 hours??
Maybe 25k for a flat isn’t pricy in Ukraine,,, but is it wise to be buying in some parts of Ukraine now?? You wrote about couples buying homes in Herson and Odesa,,, the whole southern part of Ukraine could be a war zone before Putin is finished. How much is a flat
Rick: “As you know, there is a crisis in Ukraine. people need help. They need coats, boots and even food to eat. You know one thing you dont see very much of compared to when you were coming here a few years ago? children begging on the streets.”
The only place that I have seen anyone begging,,, is near Red’s Square back in 98.
I agree,,, people need help with food and clothes,,,, so why did you buy the orphanage a big screen TV??
Rick: “Im not saying that men need to blow their wad in Ukraine to win a girl's heat but there appears to be more than a few cheap asses who whine about every kopek they spend.”
Are you implying that I am a cheap ass?? It wasn’t too long ago,,, that everyone claimed that I was buying my girlfriend with a pair of earrings?? A simply gift on Valentines Day,,, created such a stir from the Dunts of the 4um.
The following year, that same girl moved to Kyiv ,,,, my heart just sank when I heard that. She lost 10 to 20lbs in a years time,,,, I fed her well during my second visit! I went on my one and only “shopping spree” with her,,,, dropped over 2,000USD in three days! Nothing real ever became of that relationship,,, but I don’t regret helping her. Today, she is doing just fine,, great in fact! She is at the top of her profession,,, almost famous. Do I get any thanks or credit from her,,, No,,, she couldn’t write two emails on time to save her life.
Rick: “one needs to understand that 60 or 70UAH is NOT alot to pay for a taxi and shows you are a gentleman. so what if SHE is thrifty”
I’ve insisted that my dates take a taxi,,, to and from a date!! I even pay for the interps taxi,,, it’s not a lot, and it’s not a problem for me! But if I pay for a taxi,,, I want her to take the taxi! Is your point aimed at me or at everyone in general??
Rick: “one can learn that its not how much you spend on her but on how and where you spend money to achieve a greater effect with less.”
The last girl,,, that I made the trip for,,,, asked me if we could go shopping for “household goods” I said sure! Shampoo, conditioner, hair dye, and a bunch of stuff that I can’t remember,,,, two shopping bags worth,,, not a lot of money! I thought it was very practical of her!
Rick: “I may come off harsh to men here because I look at them the same way a Ukrainian looks at them.”
You come off as an ass!! It’s that EGO of your’s, that has me questioning your honesty!!
Rick: “ The reality is, LR, is Im not getting a kick over daily arguments with you over stupid sh*t. I just think you are super negative and
that apparently comes from bad experiences. But not everyone wants to hear all the negativity.
I want guys to come to Ukraine and not fall for all the traps and BS that does exist.”
Just read your own words,,,, I can’t believe you put those two sentences together??
I’m super negative,,,, but all those traps do exist?? Really??? Stop the presses!!
I take it from what you wrote,, that you don’t like agencies either?? How did you discover that?? From personal experience?? When YOU write about agencies,, it’s advice,,,, but when I write about it,,, it’s negativity??
Miss Wow?? I helped to expose one as a scammer within the last year. Moya claimed she was from an honest family,,, I brought along the proof!
Now,,, back to the beginning. This all started when you were bragging about your dates in Nikolaev. Not with one woman, but four?!! You wrote about it,,, as if, it was a real dating experience,,, one to be shared with the 4um. That’s when I looked in your Vk profile!! I found the ladies you were talking about,,, 15 and 16 years old! Something that should be out of the minds of everyone on this forum!! Ukraine has a big enough problem with sex tourists,,, it does not need any promoting from this forum or it’s members!!!
You keep writing on here,, that everyone should do, as you do! No, they shouldn’t!
You have an ego problem,,, a real character flaw! It’s as obvious to see, as some of these scammers on the websites!
Because of your ego,, maybe you exaggerate or embellish a little??
Come clean about your relationships with these “teenyboppers”!
You have a problem with my honesty,, and I don’t care!
I won’t change that for you, this forum, Ukraine, or any of the women within it!
Has it hurt my chances of finding a mate?? I’m sure it has,,, but I’m not changing!
I see that I RECEIVED EXACTLY THE RESPONSE I EXPECTED from you LR
Regardless, Its still not worth my time to argue with you and provides no benefit.
You have proven your continued bitterness. I cant imagine living such a sad and bitter life but then again, not my problem.
regarding agencies. several times I have used an agency in the past 7 years since my divorce. I had "mixed" success myself
although I refuse to call them all scammer agencies as some of them offer good possibilities for men if you use caution
and are responsible and reasonable in expectations. I have met several good girls. Only lady in Kyiv was perfect for marriage
and it was MY mistake and MY fault we did not marry. Not hers. Another lady was also perfect for marriage but decided she did not want to move to USA and I was not ready to move full time to Ukraine. NONE WERE SCAMMERS!!!!
Are there "bad" agencies? ABSOLUTELY!!! Tom Shea, among a few others over the years, is proof that they work if used correctly.
I dont understand your baseless ego claims and laugh at your "honesty"
I dont block people as I have nothing to hide however I do hide 30 people from public view
on my page to protect them from people with ill intentions. Some because I am responsible for them.
Often I post things simply to elicit a response from you and it works every time!!!
you are OBSESSED dude and that is just plain ol reality.
I buy our sponsored facilities what they say they need and also what the kids say they need and what I see they need.
That "big screen" Tv is used several hours a day for a variety of educational and other purposes.
That place, as another facility before it, is going from very bad conditions up to western standards.
Are you saying our Ukrainian kids dont deserve what western kids have simply because they are orphans????
started a new long term project a few months ago which is in a destitute shape as you seem to think is appropriate
for kids here. leaking roof, cold, absolutely no modern equipment anywhere, Is this your preference???
"No evidence in 3 years?? So you’ve been stalking me?? "
actually no, but as always I just love knowing the veins are bursting in your forehead, lol
If you live your life at home as you live it here its no wonder you are miserable!
you are mad at the world dude and that is really sad.
all the other trash isnt worth a response. I, unlike you, dont waste my time spending hours on this forum
searching for hours to know what someone said here in 2009, or resurrecting threads from 2007.
I have offered absolutely NOTHING on this forum in which I will make a profit. I am not a real estate agent
nor do I offer any other service. I have offered up the services of my friends who wouldnt mind making extra money
and dont have any financial interest in either the success or failure of any person who may chose to use them. As a client,
my friends would simply be a persons advocate and keep them from making any mistakes.
Rick: “I see that I RECEIVED EXACTLY THE RESPONSE I EXPECTED from you LR”
And I received the exact response, that I expected of you!!!
Rick: “ Regardless, Its still not worth my time to argue with you and provides no benefit.”
I really only asked one thing of you,,, and that was to come clean about your relationships with all of those underage girls,,,,, and you didn’t!! Instead,,, all you could do is to continue your attack against me,,, and avoid the only subject of importance!!
You like to hear yourself talk, and you won’t recant those stories, because then everyone would know that you are a Bull Shi!!er!! Or worse?!
And do you think, that you are the only one online that has privacy settings on Vk and fb??? I have every thing I can set, at “Friends only”!!
Rick: “You have proven your continued bitterness.”
What bitterness?? I just hate bull shi!!ers!
Rick: “ actually no, but as always I just love knowing the veins are bursting in your forehead, lol
If you live your life at home as you live it here its no wonder you are miserable!
you are mad at the world dude and that is really sad.”
But I know that you are lying!! I have always known that you are lying, anytime you say something about profiles,,,, THAT YOU CAN’T SEE!
And if I have veins sticking out,,, it’s from laughing at your pathetic attempts to discredit me, so you don’t have to answer for yourself!!
You have a simple choice,,, eat some humble pie and admit that you are a story teller,, or admit that you have crossed a line, or at the very least, have acted inappropriately with minors!
Or the route you always take,,,, attack me some more?!!
BTW,,,, I won’t take offence by you blocking me on Vk!! However,,, if someone has to point you in the right direction,,, (cheat) that would be an admission that you are a liar!!
TomZ and Dcguy,,,, A woman from the FSU once said on the forum:,,, “An FSU woman is like a cat, she will go to whomever offers the most food!”
They live day to day,,, with no foresight! You might have the time of your life with a woman over there,,, make plans for the future. You leave to go back to your home country, and she meets someone else, poof and she is gone!
That’s one reason why I don’t waste my time over there,,,, if a guy could stay there full time, it might be different, but how many of us can do that? And we might be pressured into being extra generous to make up for the time away? Meanwhile, the same thing is happening with her other men too. I won’t play the game.
LR - that may be your experience. I mean why in the hell would you take a woman on a 2K shopping spree? Don't you understand that when you do that you set a precedent? They will expect all men to do that.
You are not unlike the guy you describe as having sent 26,000 to a photo online. You think you can buy these women's affections with your money / gifts.
That's why I say no gifts or financial support till you are well into the relationship and then proceed with caution.
I actually had one girl ask me why I didn't buy her gifts on our first or second meeting. I told her because the relationship might not work out.
Yes, looney, Ive dated from 18 to 38. never dated below.
my relationships are always appropriate and you have seen photos so.....
I have found a balance in helping kids and a new transportation business to support
myself.Im becoming a local.
How is it a game? YOu accuse them of no foresight yet I can tell you the dreams and plans of 2 dozen girls over 20 that
would accept a foreign man on the same level or more than a local and ARENT SCAMMERS. They just want a good husband, period.
why is it 'playing a game" if you genuinely have a connection and have to go through the process. Are youyingowouldnt mae e hecommitment to be together as much as possible until she can come with you if that be the plan?
DC Guy, I have a girl who will accept boring...me. Im not social in reality and my girl is good with that. She would prefer to go out maybe 2 or 3 times a month to some social event, (IE clubs, etc), only going out once, maybe twice a week to eat out, wants a 50-50 plan for "home chores", looks for sales and compares prices at supermarket, is responsible with money, wants kids, etc. Met just by chance but I think she may be worth marrying at some point. we will see.
Looney. Im not trying to discredit you. I dont care enough. Im just saying you are bitter and your comment "That’s one reason why I don’t waste my time over there" is simple evidence of it. If that is your opinion, why are you even here???!!!???
Rick4girl does have a point. You haven't been to Ukraine since 2010. You're here in this forum reliving your experience, wanting to keep the dream alive and analysing what you did wrong all at the same time.
The fact that you would take a girl on a 2K shopping spree tells me that you are naïve and inexperienced. You thought, like so many guys here do or at one time did that money can buy love.
You bought into the mentality that “An FSU woman is like a cat, she will go to whomever offers the most food!”
This simply is not true, but professional daters want you to believe that so that you offer them the most.
TomZ,,, who said that my last trip was 2010??
It might set a bad precedent if you don’t know the girl at all, and if she is still on dating sites,, which she wasn’t at the time, or since.
Someone I cared about moved to Kiev and was in need. Did she fake the 10 to 20 lbs weight loss?? Did she fake her appetite? A girl down on her luck in Kiev has few options,,, I’d like to think that I helped her out, so she didn’t need to face that. Most of the items purchased were practical!
I’ve had almost 5 years to think about that, I don’t regret my actions.
It’s nothing like that guy who sent 26,000! He made 4 trips to meet her,,,, and was turned away each time,,,,, but still sent money to her/him/it after returning home! How can you compare that?? Apples and elephants??
The FSU woman who posted that quote about being like a cat, did so about 1.5 to 2 years ago. It’s from hearing so many stories here on the forum that I can agree with the quote,,,, not just my own experience!!
“You're here in this forum reliving your experience, wanting to keep the dream alive and analysing what you did wrong all at the same time.”
Actually,,, my experiences are much better than most of the posters here! When I find out later, that most of the women I wrote to,,, met, tried to meet, or just wrote to,,, weren’t even available for marriage,,,,,, had boyfriends, or not wanting to move from Ukraine,,,, had kids that they never mentioned, etc, etc. I see the only mistake I made,,, was writing to them in the first place!
But don’t worry Tom,,,, no other Ukrainians were harmed during our shopping spree!!
Rick: “Yes, looney, Ive dated from 18 to 38. never dated below.”
That’s not what you said last year!! You wrote about those teenyboppers just like you have done with other dates.
“I have found a balance in helping kids”
How often do you contemplate having a 4 on 1 with the kids that you are helping???
Perhaps what you should do Rick, is to specify what you are writing about, each time you post about a date?? Is she/they an “available legal adult” or was it a playdate with an “illegal minor(s)”?? That would save everyone a lot of time and confusion!
Don’t feel bad Rick,,, I’ve brought beer for underage girls too! They were at home in the country,,, not like they were wandering around on the city streets or anything. Their parents might have been home even, I didn’t stick around to find out. I dropped the cases off down the road,,,, then drove past and tooted the horn. The whole bunch was outside,,, 20 to 30 of them,,, and from what I could tell,,,, all girls.
Laws were much more relaxed back then,,,,, as this was 32 years ago,,,,,,, and I might have been underage myself,,,,, depending on the month,,,, and one girl was just 2 years younger than I.
Those were the good old days,,,,, bars would let a lot of underage girls in, and they never, ever had to buy their own drinks. Back then, having a nice car was a big deal, and I had one that was wall to wall velour! The girls called it the “Floatmobile” , I could seat 7-8 people, more if they doubled up.
I suppose a lot of guys would give anything to relive those days again,,, but,, that’s almost impossible here in the US.
You hear about guys in their 40’s and 50’s going through their “Midlife Crisis”. Usually after having a bad marriage. They try to pretend that they’re still young,,, dye their hair, get a tan, try to start working out again. You just hope that they realize how pathetic they look before it’s too late?!
As for me, I never had a relationship long enough to get to a "Midlife Crisis" stage.
Back over 30 years ago, it was easier for the managers to go out drinking during lunch time since the office was located right in the center of the city. One of my first upper level managers had a big reputation of hanging out at the bars during lunch time. One of the other managers also purchased a case of beer whenever he traveled to store in the hotel room fridge. Now if you are caught appearing "improper" or not becoming of an ethical worker, you could get disciplined.
Once upon a time I did air traffic control at Eastern Radar in England and our primary customers were the US Air Force bases of Mildenhall, Lakenheath, Alconbury, Bentwaters, Woodbridge, Sculthorpe aswell as RAF bases Wyton, Wattisham, Honington, Coltishall aswell as a civil airport or two, I think we were the busiest radar unit in Europe.
Of a lunchtime the majority would turn right to the mess for lunch, a few of us would turn left to the local pub :)