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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN :) Author Post MartinPC Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 6:25:28 AM   A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect: ----------------------- 1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary'). ------------------------ 2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.' ------------------- 3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. ----------------- 4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse. ---------------------- 5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public. ---------------------- 6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour. -------------------- 7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it. ------------------- 8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar. ------------------- 9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion. --------------------- 10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater. --------------------- 11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). --------------------- 12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries. -------------------- 13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad. ----------------- 14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776). --------------- 15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season. God Save the Queen! lonelyranger1701 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 11:42:03 AM   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9IGiDQWJCs dcguy Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 1:15:56 PM   The USA takes up a large portion of the North American continent because of wars. People keep complaining about how the government keeps funding and continuing wars. If Napoleon had not sold the Louisiana Purchase to the USA, this region would be speaking English, French, and Spanish as the predominant languages (which by the way is what is commonly offered in secondary schools). The Russians were looking to see Alaska in the 1800s. The British were the most interested in buying it since it was adjacent to Canada. However, the Crimean War brought out animosity between the two countries and the Russians sold it to the USA (Seward's Folly). So the USA could just be a small part of North America and not extend from one ocean to another. Then, someone else could take up the power vacuum when World War I and II came about. dcguy Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 1:16:57 PM   " looking to see Alaska" looking to sell Alaska dcguy Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 4:52:27 PM   So, the Napoleonic wars and Crimean war assisted in expanding the USA and the USA did not fire a single shot in either war! Had the USA remained as a small part of the North American continent, you have the "what ifs". There are several likely future outcomes. 1) The native Americans would be overjoyed of having one less foreign invader to deal with. 2) The UK would not be a likely country to take up the power vacuum. Perhaps, it would be the Kaiser or Führer? 3) The smaller territory would not have included Hawaii, so the entry to World War II would be even more remote. Oh, the possibilities! dcv Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 5:40:30 PM   This is is a forum about relationships with Russian Ukraine women you stupid Cunt kaiserdag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 7:40:39 PM   ILMAO! America's biggest mistake was to rescue Britain from German occupation and destruction , twice. .. And since then, protect the NOT Our Queen from the USSR/ Russia with 20K US Armed Forces personnel at the cost of Americans tax payers money. Anyway... Let's bring back the subject that most men like to eat every night,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, that's right! Is called pu$$y! MartinPC Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/10/2016 9:37:13 PM   Britain was never occupied be Germany kaiserdag, only the Channel Islands and, technically, they are not part of Britain. dcv Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/11/2016 4:45:13 AM   Americas biggest mistake was to try and fight the Vietnam war without Britain and Canada on its side. As it is America suffered total defeat and humiliation at the hands of Tiny North Vietnam. MartinPC Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/11/2016 5:17:24 AM   "And since then, protect the NOT Our Queen from the USSR/ Russia with 20K US Armed Forces personnel at the cost of Americans tax payers money" And which country permitted Ronald Reagan to launch his strike against Gaddafi from RAF (Royal Air Force) bases Lakenheath, Mildenhall and Upper Heyford and then the Gulf War lauches of B52's from RAF (Royal Air Force) Fairford? How about the USAF bases in Germany ... Were those helping out UK also or is it the case the the Yanks wanted to be closer to the 'Cold War' action and the likes of UK and Germany were kind enough to permit USA air bases closer to the USSR front? :) Tom Shea Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/12/2016 1:52:45 PM   You fags got your asses kicked the first and second time. Maybe the 3rd is a charm. It's funny how the rest of the world shits is pants when ever we have a non fag leader coming. We aren't like the rest of the world, blindly letting terrorists in. kaiserdag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/12/2016 3:53:02 PM   Send: 3/10/2016 9:37:13 PM "Britain was never occupied be Germany kaiserdag, only the Channel Islands and, technically, they are not part of Britain." 100% correct and I agree. The last Britain was conquered was in 1066 by the French, courtesy of William The Conqueror. Send: 3/11/2016 5:17:24 AM ""And since then, protect the NOT Our Queen from the USSR/ Russia with 20K US Armed Forces personnel at the cost of Americans tax payers money" And which country permitted Ronald Reagan to launch his strike against Gaddafi from RAF (Royal Air Force) bases Lakenheath, Mildenhall and Upper Heyford and then the Gulf War lauches of B52's from RAF (Royal Air Force) Fairf We Americans had taken matters into our own and especially Libya since then Leading the Charge from 1805 with ...."The First Barbary War had begun four years earlier, when U.S. President Thomas Jefferson ordered U.S. Navy vessels to the Mediterranean Sea in protest of continuing raids against U.S. ships by pirates from the Barbary states–Morocco, Algeria, Tunis, and Tripolitania. American sailors were often abducted along with the captured booty and ransomed back to the United States at an exorbitant price. After two years of minor confrontations, sustained action began in June 1803, when a small U.S. expeditionary force attacked Tripoli harbor in present-day Libya." http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/to-the-shores-of-tripoli If we want to get closer to Russia we had moved the camp to the Baltic States, Poland, and the Balkans countries. There, living is fun and cheap. Don't be surprised if we start closing base in the UK.... Oh! We already started. Mildenhall RAF T-3 years. kaiserdag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/12/2016 3:57:56 PM   Send: 3/10/2016 9:37:13 PM "Britain was never occupied be Germany kaiserdag, only the Channel Islands and, technically, they are not part of Britain." 100% correct and I agree. The last Britain was conquered was in 1066 by the French, courtesy of William The Conqueror. Send: 3/11/2016 5:17:24 AM ""And since then, protect the NOT Our Queen from the USSR/ Russia with 20K US Armed Forces personnel at the cost of Americans tax payers money" And which country permitted Ronald Reagan to launch his strike against Gaddafi from RAF (Royal Air Force) bases Lakenheath, Mildenhall and Upper Heyford and then the Gulf War lauches of B52's from RAF (Royal Air Force) Fairford." Sir Martin, We Americans had taken matters into our own and especially Libya since then Leading the Charge from 1805 with ...."The First Barbary War had begun four years earlier, when U.S. President Thomas Jefferson ordered U.S. Navy vessels to the Mediterranean Sea in protest of continuing raids against U.S. ships by pirates from the Barbary states–Morocco, Algeria, Tunis, and Tripolitania. American sailors were often abducted along with the captured booty and ransomed back to the United States at an exorbitant price. After two years of minor confrontations, sustained action began in June 1803, when a small U.S. expeditionary force attacked Tripoli harbor in present-day Libya." http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/to-the-shores-of-tripoli If we want to get closer to Russia we had moved the camp to the Baltic States, Poland, and the Balkans countries. There, living is fun and cheap. Don't be surprised if we start closing base in the UK.... Oh! We already started. Mildenhall RAF T-3 years. kaiserdag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/12/2016 4:31:15 PM   ....actually, since 1776 when we kicked British arses off Murika. kaiserdag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/12/2016 4:49:12 PM   Send: 3/11/2016 4:45:13 AM Report to Moderator Americas biggest mistake was to try and fight the Vietnam war without Britain and Canada on its side. As it is America suffered total defeat and humiliation at the hands of Tiny North Vietnam. DCV, More likely the whole Vietnam. America did not stopped the spread of communist; instead, it collapsed all by itself. Invading Afghanistan hasn't stopped terrorism/ fanatics of some Islamic States. On the contrary is now the longest American armed conflict in history. And... We are still taken care of business there the old fashioned way with Americans taxes payers money. SMH MartinPC Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/12/2016 9:43:21 PM   kaiserdag, Will you be complaining next about Britain's involvement in the Crimean War per chance? kaiserdag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/13/2016 3:34:55 AM   Insert from Wikipedia on the Crimean War. "... Nicholas I needed a subservient Turkey for the sake of Russian security; Napoleon III needed success for the sake of his domestic position; the British government needed an independent Turkey for the security of the Eastern Mediterranean....Mutual fear, not mutual aggression, caused the Crimean war.[14]. Enemies went to bed and the alliance went $h!t. Got to love the history of our world! Cheers mate!!! MartinPC Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/13/2016 5:55:42 AM   kaiserdag, And this is saying something ... I'd rather exchange conversation with RB rather than some of the boring crap you are coming out with! ragingbull Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/13/2016 11:01:48 AM   It's too bad my posts are scrutinized. I will not engage. Only Martin can post what he wants. MartinPC Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/13/2016 10:58:51 PM   "Only Martin can post what he wants" Really? ... dcv 3/10/2016 5:40:30 This is is a forum about relationships with Russian Ukraine women you stupid Cunt Russian brides > Main Forum > A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN :)
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