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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > My Money, Your Money, Our Money Author Post sanchopanza Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/10/2004 2:37:35 AM   Or: Marriage + Money It's not a trivial question/topic. Many divorces are caused by money matters, and many fights after divorces are also caused by money matters. Who "holds the Purse Strings"? (in the context of this Forum) (by the way: I have this from a reliable source (?): The common way in British working class families a couple of generations ago was that the husband brought the pay home - untouched - on payday, the wife then gave him some pocket money and administered the rest (paid rent, bought food, etc.)). dreamfinder Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/10/2004 3:41:38 AM   Good old times! But never coming back. I imagine my wife would want to work too, so I am more interested in those girls that have a "neutral" profession (I think that law profession is still somewhat connected to socialist system, whereas health and services couldn't be). I think we will both give a greater part of income to the family basket, the rest is to spend... Ptichka Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/10/2004 7:30:26 AM   Sancho I don't understand why in a family only 1 person should be responsible for money spending??? Why 2 people can't do that together??? They can easily agree on many things, and when only 1 person is responsible for money spending he or she, has to take desicions, which another partner may not like. But in discussion, they may come to the desicion which will be good for them both:) wessman Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/10/2004 12:53:26 PM   My Money Our Money is still my money! Archaic Thinking Today it was reported that the largest medical college in the state of Florida for the first time has a larger female enrolling class than males, this is mirroring the national trend. Women are kicking men's butts right now in all categories, education, job placement, women’s salaries are increasing faster than men's and they get more raises, bigger raises, and more often then men. Women control more savings and checking accounts in America than men. Real property is in more females names than males and most of the men's property is co-owned by women. 73% of all autos in this country have a woman's name on the title. Men have cars titled with an and between the names, so they can keep their woman from taking the car and leaving, this is just another ploy for oppressing women. Women are having children and raising them alone here, some because dead beat dads abandon their families though now more women choose to have children and do not want the guy around. Women have become self sufficient. So men here try desperately to control their women, girl friends, and wife’s by controlling the money to make a woman feel desperately helpless. This is why women are climbing the ranks of the status quo if they had money they would haul ass and leave this guy. Some men just don't get it, read the writing on the wall. DEAR JOHN I WANT A DIVORCE. I am not a commodity that you have purchased to be used at your discretion. Taking a woman hostage and using money for her favor will soon be history here; by then all the Russian woman will be gone too. I think this thread should be explored deeply. sanchopanza Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/11/2004 5:00:18 AM   Ptichka, you wrote: "...Why 2 people can't do that together??? ..." I agree. Now, in my post I asked "...Who "holds the Purse Strings"? ..." I asked how it is, I did not state how it should be. I could ask other questions, like "How is it in the FSU?" and "What are the expectations (in general) from women in the FSU?" Ptichka Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/12/2004 12:43:33 PM   Sancho, well you see, I can only speak for myself, so when we have a dinner out with my boyfriend, it is he who pays the bill. If he ran out of money I'll give him the money it's not a problem, but he thinks that it's his responsibility, and if he can't cope with it, then he may feel not too good. When it's going for vacation or something like that, we spend the money together for each other:) My parents, they make all the desicions concerning money together, none of them dominates in this area. sanchopanza Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/13/2004 1:03:51 AM   Ptichka, I'm sure you and your boyfriend are intelligent and smart enough to have worked out a system you are comfortable with. When reading my questions and my comments bear in mind that I'm sitting in a different country, and that I'm thinking of a situation where a woman from FSU marrys a man from 'the west'. -Where fewer transactions are 'cash-based' and more are based on bank-accounts (incl. 'direct transfer'), cheques, 'plastic', etc. -and things are bought on credit... -bear also in mind that a married couple is supposed to 'share everything'. I'm asking questions. I'm not telling people how it should be... Ptichka Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/13/2004 2:20:55 AM   Sancho, I understand that all, but you also forget one more thing, a woman who comes into a foreign country, in this situation, comes to her husband, and if he won't help her get used to the new way of life, in the matter of cash and bank, then who else will do??? I was just explaining how things are here, so you could see if it would be difficult or not. "that a married couple is supposed to 'share everything'"...sorry I really don't understand this, if 2 people share everything...so where is the mystery where is the romance in the relationship between a man and a woman?????? sanchopanza Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/13/2004 2:39:42 AM   re.: "......sorry I really don't understand this, if 2 people share everything...so where is the mystery where is the romance in the relationship between a man and a woman??????..." A very good question, indeed. But a different question! Most Fairy Tales end with the Wedding: "...and they married and lived happily ever after...." -in 'real life' that is not always the case... After the Honeymoon is over the 'real everyday life' starts... The 'feelings' about this are even reflected in the use of the word 'honeymoon' about governments and politicians... (after a short, 'sweet' period, the 'real life' with all its problems start...) You might have pointed to a serious problem, Ptichka, perhaps it *is* impossible to 'share everything' and still have mystery and romance. Ptichka Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/13/2004 3:08:51 AM   Really? So how it is possible to share everything and still have mystery and romance??? For me romance is connected to the word spontaneous as well:) sanchopanza Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 8/13/2004 4:25:11 AM   "...So how it is possible to share everything and still have mystery and romance???..." When you find out, write a book about it. It will sell well! It could actually be that when women in the west gained their equal share (or more) of control, they lost the possibility for 'mystery and romance' - which they also wanted! -As this debate is going on more and more 'questions' are revealed, which should be discussed before the wedding... (but, would there be time for Romance, if so much time is spent on asking questions ??) 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