Send Flowers to Russia, Ukraine and Worldwide with Cyber-Florist.com Fiance.com: Beautiful Russian brides
Home  |  About  |  Forum  |  User Blogs  |  Login  |  Register

	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > Family Values and education Author Post N()R Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 10:49:48 AM   We have all read about it... Young, beautiful women with family values... I have been browsing through some adds on the internet today, mostly for fun, cause right now I am having more than enought with the ones I am already having conversations with.. In fact my Estonain friend is coming for a visit the 5th am may :))) So no need for me to search a new girl at this moment.. I told you I was going to give her a chance, and I will really have a close eye on her when it comes to the fact of her being spoiled or not.. (I really don't want a spoiled girl...). My point is.. All of these women in the adds have something in common.. Have you noticed?? yes, I am sure you have, they are all having some kind of bachelor degree, they are doctors, lawyers and so on... You might ask yourself, WHY??? If these girls are so family oriented, why go years after years at school??? Why not learn childrens-care, housekeeping, knitting and those things?? Will they actually forget all about their education just because of some guys like us? I would love my woman to work, I think it is healthy for the relationship, you get impulses at work, and you have something else to talk about than only babycare and pampers.. BUt it is a fact that some guys expect to bring home a housewife, someone that will stay in the home, take care of the house, children and so on... Is this what these Russian beauties want out of life? I think you have to ask yourself this question. Why is most russian familys only bringing up one child? Because they are poor and don't have money to raise more children?? NO, It is because they are so busy with their carreer it is no time for more children. This has been all over the news, Russia is in trouble, there are not enough children being born... And for those of you planning to find yourself a housewife, have you considered that today in most familys both parents have to work to make enough income. We live in a worls with high taxes, and the bills never seem to take an end.. Do you really have what it takes when it comes to the economic part to support her and the children on your own? I don't mean to lecture you guys, I know most of you know what you are doing, but this is worth thinking about. Why do I concern about this? Because I think some of us are dreamers, nothing wrong in having dreams, but remember these womens life is about to change dramatically, and if you want it to last it is important to build your new relationship on reality and not dreams. I am learning something new every day, as today.. Why did I even think about this? Well, it is influenced by all of you fellow Forum friends. You write something that makes the mind go hmmm... And this is really a good thing for all of us. nasfan6 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 11:32:59 AM   Nor Also former communist sterilization practices have added to the problem of children. As for supporting a family, that is a matter of priorities. It is not how much money you make, but what you do with the money you make. A man in the states making 40,000 a year can support a wife and a child even if she doesn't work. It's not magic, it is discipline and sacrifice and it matters on what is most important. You can make 100,000 a year and lack of financial discipline will not let you support a wife and a child. jjbarrier Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 11:42:52 AM   This problem is not only limited to former FSU countries or Russia alone, it is also a problem in Europe. Other cultures seem to place greater emphasis on having children, while we perhaps get too caught up in enjoying our well being and are not willing to sacrifice the second or third car and the family vacation, of course there is the 30,000$ per year college education as well, and so on. If you think back only 2 generations, many of the things we take for granted didn't exist, and back then there was no worrying about who was going to fund our pensions. izifaddag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 12:26:50 PM   Nasfan6 I agree completely. Anyway, my new wife will work. That is just a fact of life here. Just as everyone else we will work out childcare when it happens. Everybody else does it I can too. It is all about teamwork unclebuck Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 12:31:14 PM   Nor, I know what your talking about! My lady is a worker and has her own succesfull buisness in Vitebsk. We have known each other a long time and she has photoes to see our lifestyle but she is going to have real culture shock. In her city I have never seen a pickup truck. We have two here in Texas at my house. Even though she speaks great english she does not understand realestate and morgages. She has two degrees but we have already have agreed that she will stay at home and get adjusted at her own pace before she goes to work. It is realy hard for the women in the FSU to join the idea of a cowboy and a buisness man together. Exspecting a vibrent, cultured, educated person to just change is too much to ask. If you want a loyal partner and not a house keeper go to the FSU. If all you want is a housekeeper go hire one and save the grief. To many relationships founder on misguided dreams not reality. Read some of TOAD's ideas and that might help some of the misguided to a better understanding of what it takes to make it. He has it together! Unclebuck N()R Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 12:57:25 PM   nas, izi, jj and others.. This is not an attack on you guys at all, I have no doubt about your motives and economic situation.. I just think it is worth concider, because not all people are like you guys or myself. I can also take care of a family, I am lucky when it comes to that, but... Is that a goal in itself? That is my question.. Is this what they want? Is this why they spent 5 to 12 years or more with their higher education? I am just asking... I am not saying I have the answeres. Unclebuck, Quote: ___________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________ "Exspect ing a vibrent, cultured, educated person to just change is too much to ask. If you want a loyal partner and not a house keeper go to the FSU. If all you want is a housekeeper go hire one and save the grief. ___________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________ Thank you for putting words to my thoughts :) nasfan6 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 7:25:45 PM   Dear Uncle Buck Toad and having it together? That might qualify for the oxymoron of the beginning of the new millenium!!Toad I like ya, just can't refuse the opportunity to bust your balls. IZ, of course she will work, but it must be for her soul not the economic support of a family. There will be too many adjustments to make coming here first. First let her get acclimated to the environment. Getting thrown in the work force, she will suffer some discrimination don't think that won't happen. That could be devastating to her. I told Larisa, who has worked the last 22 years as a speech therapist in Ukraine, I don't care when and what she does, I want her to become comfortable first with her new home, when she is ready to work, she works. If that takes two years so be it. Nor This follows along the same line with what I was saying to Izi, the women are not the only ones that must adapt. We also must adapt to different expectations in life with these ladies. Most of these ladies want something more than higher education can offer. When Larissa explained to me she did not want a better way of life, she just wanted a better life, I had to think for a moment. It wasn't about material things, it was more of an emotional nature. Sure she wants nice things but most what these ladies are looking for cannot be bought in any store.Love, fidelity and opportunity. Our lives are going to change without a doubt, but I have a feeling for most of us it will be the most positive and rewarding adventure we have had in our lives. Later Mike izifaddag Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 8:24:15 PM   Nas Sorry it is a bit of both. I have been engineering the financial solution to all these problems in the background when I was with Marina. It is obvious that time will be needed before a financial contribution can be made. Language needs to be improved, children need to be established in school. Just getting used to the local geography will take some doing. But 2 years? No way. We will be living on pasta and bread. I don't think I am being unreasonable. Marina wanted to start earning as soon as possible. She was concerned how she would do it but determined. Who am I to stand in the way? So I came up with a solution by freeing up money to be able to subsidize the family until extra money could come in. Usual stuff, clearing debts, reducing spending now before she would come a year or so in advance, redoing my equity line of credit etc etc All temporary though. Now it isn't to be and I have more time. Yesterday I had my friends wife, Lena, take out my stitches. We all chatted. Strong connection here. Lena is from Colombia. She is a doctor. Here she is just a medical assistant. They got married and a she got pregnant. She is smart, she wanted to work immediately. She could speak virtually zero English. I remember when they first got married. What determination! They now have a beautiful baby boy, a beautiful life and a beautiful house. Teamwork is what did it and smart money handling. She will once again be a doctor. Mario, her husband and I work together. We might even try a business venture together. I know what he earns. He needs Lena to work but it is ok. She is enthusiastic to pitch in. I feel I can have the same thing going. Mutual support, understanding and teamwork will make us better off than we are now and provide a safe comfortable envoiroment for our children. Whether, adopted, inherited or ours. It will be ok but she will work as soon as possible. Believe me I will be as accomodating as I can, this is a huge step. I expect a contribution at the eariest opportunity though. I have actually discussed this with several ladies and it really hasn't been any kind of issue. They are keen. nasfan6 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 9:00:18 PM   Izi I doubt you will be living on pasta and bread. My point is there will be enough stress with relocating to a totally different culture, that entering the work force is the last thing I want to add as pressure. I'm not looking for a housewife, and as I told Larisa, who wants to work as soon as possible, it was not an issue to me when she did. Yes she wants to contribute, but it is not an expectation with me. Expect small and receive large in return. I have a small business on the side that makes about the same amount of income that she would be capable of earning when she first gets here. So she is not a financial strain. Also in my situation she is 43, and children are not an issue for us so the long term financial burden is not there. I'm inclined to agree with Toad (I hate to admit that) I would like for her to be involved in the small business I have, it will not require her to immediately compete in the work force and allow her to adjust to her new surroundings. Hell she has to learn to drive, so that is a huge undertaking LOL! I just don't want boredom to set in, her goal is to venture in dress designing, I told her this is the land of opportunity, so seize it. Don't worry about making an income, make a life. One that she enjoy's and looks forward to each day. The income will then take care of itself. Later Mike Later Mike crashnsplash Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 10:24:14 PM   Hey fellas, just popping in to say hey! I hear what all of you are saying and I am there already =) Adjustment is going well... My 9 year old daughter is having a little bit rough time adjusting. My God has my life changed already!! Really havent had time to post, dont even have time now, but I will be back to let you guys know how its going. Cheers!! =)))) N()R Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2005 10:45:52 PM   Nas, Quote: _______________________________________________________ _______________________________________________ Our lives are going to change without a doubt, but I have a feeling for most of us it will be the most positive and rewarding adventure we have had in our lives. _____________________________________________________________________ _________________________________ With women that passionate, loving, caring and sweet.. Who's life would not be changed?? I totally agree with you. My point was that people has to look into the culture and traditions where the woman is born and raised, and find sollutions not only for themselves, but also ask, what the woman want out of this... I think Unclebuck said it when he said "if you want a housekeeper, go rent one.." It is just about being realistic, and don't use a dream as the foundation of the relationship. If you are being realistic about this you can spare yourself and not at least the woman for a lot of greef... GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 12:53:45 AM   Nasfan, Let me help you save some face, lol... You don't even have to admit you agree with me. I'll tell the world I adopted your ideas, instead...How about that. Feel better now?..:) Toad Ditto Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 5:58:49 AM   Toad, No one will buy the adoption excuse. After all, a Toad can't change its stripes. GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 6:29:32 AM   Adoption excuse?? wtf are you talking about, senor? nasfan6 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 6:41:19 AM   Thanks Toad I could hardly sleep last night, now you will make it all better now! LOL Ditto Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 10:20:37 AM   Toad, adopting nasfan's ideas. Annika77 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 10:39:13 AM   BRAVO NOR! People belive that they WANT to belive, why you ruin their dreams :). But for me its so funny to read as family oriented "russian princesses" turn to real women who have short temper and who can drink you guys under the table. And they dont spend their time at home cooking and knitting. Somebody wrote here that he miss time in 50. and woman like hes mother was. Oops... Even in 50. women in Europe worked hard to build up their countries after II WW. I tried to tell that in that board...but what I got...Only bla-bla...you are similar to western feminists, you hate russians bla-bla from jetmba and Louis Alberto Toad. But Im happy because seem everybody will get their lessons sooner or later! Bagira Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 2:49:26 PM   N0R, you said: “Why is most Russian families only bringing up one child? Because they are poor and don't have money to raise more children?” My point of view. Russian woman are family oriented. That means they are responsible for the kids. Woman usually makes her own decision about the first child. Dissension about the second kid people usually make together. It is big financial decision and not all families can afford the second child, especially now. GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 2:59:07 PM   Good point, Bagira. People who refrain from bringing children to this world without the means to raise them are a scandalous freeloading epidemic in the US and other countries who social systems that enable, support and encourage this freeloading aberration. toad GLTALLTOAD Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/4/2005 3:00:04 PM   DO NOT refrain Your Reply: Your name:   New Registration Password:   Forgot password?   refresh Code:   Russian brides > Main Forum > Family Values and education
	Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6