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	Create New Topic   My Posts   My forum buddies   Invite friends   Private messages Russian brides > Main Forum > "...financially secured man...." Author Post geriatrix Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/27/2006 7:16:17 AM   "...financially secured man...." This term always make me take notice. I am not rich, but I survive. However, I would not like to support a big spender, who thinks that it is my job to earn as much as she can spend. What does the term "mean" - in the context of Russian women? danny3777 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/27/2006 7:43:43 AM   In the context of a young 20ish 'model' seeking a guy 20ish years her senior it means 'I want a sugar daddy'. In the terms of a more modest age difference it means, or it should mean, 'I can find a poor man at home so why should I look for a poor man in a foreign country?'. alyhaynes Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/28/2006 7:43:29 AM   well done, Martin_UK! I love your style! :))) Bagira Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/28/2006 8:17:02 PM   Yes, Marriage is rather expensive stuff and as someone here is already calculate $5000 per woman's food (I think he lied). And she usually has children and parents and supports them. She also expects to give at least the same support then she moves to US. She will not have permission for work for at least 6 months. YOU need to be mature and think about money also. geriatrix Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/28/2006 11:08:32 PM   If I can eat baked beans on toast, why should she have caviar and bubbly wine? alyhaynes Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/29/2006 8:33:47 AM   to Geriatrix: If you can't provide caviar and bubbly wine- don't bother with a Russian woman in the first place! Adman Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/29/2006 10:52:22 PM   You have to ask yourself. What sort of woman do you think you will entice, with a can of bakebeans? The woman is obviously going to eat better in the FSU. Do you have anything else going for you???? geriatrix Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/30/2006 9:18:55 AM   OK, I can afford more than baked beans, but I am not interested in a woman who wants to exchange services for goods or money. Adman Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/30/2006 4:03:17 PM   Its the age old question "Does she love me or what I can provide"? On the other hand. What is the use of riches, if you dont use it to suduce a beautiful woman?-))) alexferd Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/30/2006 5:47:24 PM   sounds like we enter new century where women dont hide what they expect from men. Hot_wife Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/31/2006 5:41:04 AM   You know why all you can see sad stories (from the both sides) because HAPPY COUPLES HAVE NO TIME TO WRITE! They have better things to do! Hot_wife Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/31/2006 5:41:46 AM   Guys you are pathetic! You asking questions like Oh does she really love me or what I can give her. Have you ever thought that a girl could be thinking... does he really love me and me as a person or my looks my and body. You see it is two way street. I would say that there 90% of Russian women still looking for love (at least I really hope that there are still 90%) and any woman from this 90% wants to find a mean of her dreams. Man to love to spend the rest of her days with. BUT there are some other things. First, women do want you to be able to provide for them (not just for money and shopping and other girlish stuff) the reasons are, to be sure that in a new country they would be poor and hungry and that her man is a man and CAN provide. Can you imagine that you have to intrust yourself to a person you know by letters and something like a month or two in real life. That you would be helpless, with out possibility to get a job for 3 to 6 months and even after words a job you would be able to get in a fast food. How is that sound to you? I bet that you would like to be sure that your spouse will be able to take care of you during this difficult period of time. And another reason, you see Russia still has a very strong family values (something like America was in 50th) and there still a very strong stereotype that man MUST be a man and take care of it’s family. So when a girl ask you about money you making do not rush to put her information in to a black list. Some of them still might be very nice and honest looking for love girls. But if you want to know something about person you are interested in how you going to find things out? By asking!!!!!!!!!!! You know how many girls are unhappy in America? Have you ever thought that coming to another country she would be much more vulnerable that you are? You are only risking money, they risking much more trusting in YOU! No family to help, some times no money, very often very poor language skills, no information what to do in a bad situation and so on! You know why all you can see sad stories (from the both sides) because HAPPY COUPLES HAVE NO TIME TO WRITE! They have better things to do! And another reason. Some people (women and men in Russia) they no nothing about America about American way of life. Their information comes from soap operas on TV where every guy is a millionaire everything is so pretty and easy. And even if she haven’t seen anything like that you can be sure she has a friend which did and will gladly share that information. Right now it would take MUCH more than just luck to find right person for you over the internet because the idea itself became to popular and there are lots of good and bad women mix up together in the web and sometimes there is no way to tell one from another. However it is possible. So first of all be reasonable! Think! Do not buy a pretty face and letters like oh my God my mom was hit by a car I need money to save her. As for photos ask pics of her at home with family. As for money trust me in a case with a ill moms it doesn’t happening like that! Think you have your family would you go and start talking to any body other the net if something like that happens with your loved one? NO! You’ll be spending time by the loved ones side! And one more tip about money. Real woman are proud they would never tell you that they have money problems. It is true that for some girls would be really difficult or almost impossible to find money for a ticket to USA, but we are not talking bout coming to US yet! We talking about a beginning of your relationships. So do not send money. What to send her some thing send her flowers. And if you want to see you woman in real life do not go to some 3rd county to meet even if it is more easy for you and her. Go to her home town. See her with her family. You’ll see a real person. Come see her 2 or 3 times. Try to find a real person. If you are 40 or older do not even think about girls age of 18 or 20 or 25. As I said be reasonable. You are looking for a wife for a life not for some problems for later. Do not be dishonest with yourself. This kind of relationships are possible BUT very rare. I mean to make them work and last. It is rare! So keep looking , be smart and you’ll find a good woman one and only for you. And when you find one do not think about your relationship as Russian woman American man, it would be a man woman relations and to make it work you would have to do the same things as you would do in any other relations. danny3777 Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/31/2006 3:25:25 PM   Hot Wife, Before generalise all guys as being pathetic perhaps you should engage your brain before opening you mouth. Try reading what has been written and if there is something that you feel you would like to respond to then address it to the guy by name and not the entire male species as it seems you are doing! Adman Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/31/2006 4:16:39 PM   Martin The way I read it, Hot Wife is only referring to those that ask the question "Oh does she really love me or what I can give her" That given, I think the rest of her post is good and goes on to answer why the question exists quite clearly.. "Some people (women and men in Russia) they no nothing about America about American way of life. Their information comes from soap operas on TV where every guy is a millionaire everything is so pretty and easy. And even if she haven’t seen anything like that you can be sure she has a friend which did and will gladly share that information" Adman Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 3/31/2006 9:23:23 PM   I should add I dont intirely agree with Hot Wifes last paragragh. When i met a Russian woman in Thailand it was the perfect way to go. We spent 10 days togather, 24hrs a day. By the end of it we new exactly what each wanted and had a great holiday to boot. Had I gone to Vladivostok, she fully intended to drag me around to all the flash night clubs to meet all her friends (mostly guys) None of them except her can speak English and I would have been like a dog in the corner, not being able to speak. Being in Vladivostok in th middle of winter with no language skills would have been a disaster. What really will count in the end is, will the woman like living with you and your friends in NZ, USA or where ever. Seeing her situation in FSU doesnt really matter if thats not where you are going to live. Of coarse the Russian trip has to be done for visa porposes. The age thing is a funny one, I have now met several young wealthy Russian woman and the flat out are not interested inyoung guys there own age. They seemingly have nothing to gain by going out with older guys but thats what they want to do. Perhaps the female viewers could add some insight into why this is? Hot_wife Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/1/2006 12:31:24 AM   Martin_UK, my brain is always engaged. I strongly encourage you to do the same!))) Joking! The reason I even started this conversation is, I am Russian woman happily married to American man for a soon will be 9 years. So I guess I have something to say about it, and it isn’t just words, it is experience too. Adman, you are right I was speaking about guys you mentioned. I am not trying to stuck up for any body or speak down to any body. And I feel deeply sorry for guys which are being financially secured. And I feel sorry for women which are unhappy in international marriage. I see that other side and you don’t. And some times good guys would never try their luck again after bad experience. Sad part that there could be a real good ladies for them BUT they would never meet. You know how many women were added to a black list just because they asked some financial questions. This is what I am trying to say! Relations are difficult in real life as you know, but it is even more difficult in the web space when both sides are scared. As for meeting women in Russia. I agree with Adman, it could be a disaster. But there is a good side too. First of all your lady will fell more safe. And she wouldn’t feel that pressure about all sex thing. And an other side, you will see a real person. Just because at the beginning of dating every body trying to look better than they really are. It isn’t bad thing, it is human nature, to want to be liked. I think (my own opinion) that you’ll be able to see your lady at home with her family, her every day life, every day tacks, you’ll get better impression about her real character. So I would advice it. But you can come to Russia at your second trip But you right you have nothing to do in Russia during winter! Do not even think about going there. Cold, cold and one more time cold!) As for age. Hmmm, you are right it is tricky one. Young guys in Russia are kind of more immature, so young girls are looking for something more safe, stability, and so on. And again, it isn’t bad thing, country still isn’t very stable, so it is natural to wish for something different, secure. Some of them do not even understand it themselves. But still if she is to young there is a very good chance that she’ll grow out of your relations. I said relations are possible but rare! I would say in 25 lady already knows what she wants from life, younger I don’t think so. If you are choosing one of them you are gambling! I really hope both of you will win, but there is a risk. I’m being ask by our single friends how to find right woman...One of my answers are, do not look at young girls.))) Why? It is hard to tell you...some are still to romantic having no idea what they want, what they want to do with their lives. They are thinking about future but in a different way...Do not ask me to describe you how women think you have to be one to understand it.))))) As for gain something going out with older guys, oh they do! Older guy is already established in this life. Already has something, education, job, some savings, some place to live at minimum. So now you can see the math! Bagira Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2006 1:29:57 PM   geriatrix If you can allow to eat only baked beans on toasts that means you do not have enough money to create a family with either a local girl or with a Russian woman. Philly Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/2/2006 2:24:42 PM   Very interesting discussion. I have travelled to Ukraine three times to meet women, and have some experience to relate. First, I think Hot_wife has very good points to make, in general. I agree that there are good and bad aspects of both meeting the woman in her city and also in meeting in a "neutral" city. Adman's experience in Thailand is what we all dream about and hold out hope for. However, one young woman aged 26 wrote me beautifully affectionate letters before we met, and asked to meet in Kiev last month, instead of in her hometown of Mariupol. So I paid all expenses for her and an interpreter to travel by train to Kiev and their hotel room for two nights. Once we were together, the woman showed me absolutely no signs of affection or even polite interest, and by the end of the trip the interpreter's opinion was that the woman had simply used me in order to achieve her goal of sightseeing in Kiev. After I returned home to the USA, the woman sent a letter saying what a wonderful time she had, and how she thought it was a great beginning for our relationship! I did not reply. So, this is the risk to this approach. On the other hand, I have travelled to meet women in their hometown, and have had the woman get caught up in her daily life responsibilities and friends, and repeatedly break dates or not show up for dates, and utterly waste my time. Sitting in a hotel room by myself with minimal Russian langage skills when I could be home myself living a life, is a frustrating experience. On the hand, I have met three women who were quite sincere and made time for two dates in their home city, but I was not attracted to them. Just as in America, the prettier ones get away with less courteous behavior. Hot_wife, I know in my head that you are probably correct about women in their early twenties being too young to marry. Unfortunately, on these websites, the young girls seem to be way more attractive than the women in their late 20s/early 30s. So, it is so tempting to try to take that small chance that a 20-25 year age difference will work. Yes, I agree with Hot_wife once again that if we men seek beauty in a partner, it is fair for the woman to seek "financial security". I don't know the finances of Geriatrix, but the average American is not making enough to save any money. So I wonder what you all think about the idea that a man with average "survival" wages will probably attract a Russian/Ukrainian women with "average" looks? Adman Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2006 12:40:09 AM   For the record. My trip to Thailand was far from perfect. I am 50, her profile said 26. It was always going to be a longshot. My thought was, if things went really really well between us and considering her job and conections, I could probably get her into NZ without marrying her and then we could just see what happens. It turns out she is only 20. When I tell her "if I knew you were only 20, I wouldnt have brought you down here", she said "20 26 whats the difference?" She was fun and great to be with, How can you be angry? We sent eachother over 200 emails, What she told me in those was all true, her profile was a complete fabrication. She did not want her identity on the dating site to be known. At 20 she was way beyound her years, very independent and not ready to settle down with anybody. Her father is giving her a holiday in Turkey at the end of the month and she asked whether I want to join her, but whats the point, there isnt going to be any long term future in it. The point of all this is I still think it was a good way to meet someone and I think you can learn as much or more in a third country as you would, in there home town. PS It was my idea to meet in Thailand and she was disappointed when I wanted to change plans and meet in Thailand instead of Vlad. geriatrix Member send PM   block PM add to buddies Send: 4/3/2006 9:52:49 PM   "You are a fit and healthy, attractive, single well-educated and financial secure." (from a profile) Duh. If I were, why would I be here now? Your Reply: Your name:   New Registration Password:   Forgot password?   refresh Code:   Russian brides > Main Forum > "...financially secured man...."
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