girl does not want to meet in Ukraine

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Russian brides > Main Forum > girl does not want to meet in Ukraine

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BIGREDMACHINE

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	Send: 5/19/2010 11:40:55 PM

I have a girl whom I have not meet in person yet. I met her first through an online social network. Witch is better than ho-key Russian bride type sites. first I asked her if we could meet after getting to know her a little at a time i've known her for 2 years. She suggested we meet in Thailand but I did not want to be 30 hours in transit. Then she suggested Turkey. It did not seem like a good place for an American to go. So I made plans for Spain. She agreed to it at first and was excited. Later she explained it was hard to get visa. Next I changed the itinerary over to Dominican Republic all inclusive resort. I also got a ticket for her for about $1,500.00 the flight had a stop in New York but the travel agent assured me that if she stayed in the airport and continued on to the D.R. there would be no need for a visa. Not the case. At 1:45 am I got a call. She told me that she could not come because of the U.S. connecting flight. Luckily enough I did get a refund because the flight was delayed if the flight is delayed you are entitled to full refund. I had sent her $200 u.s.d. before for travel from Sumy to Kiev both ways plus fare to and from the resort. That was reasonable. Now it is soon to be June so it is too hot for those southern latitudes. I call and text her about 8 times a week so... she likes to talk to me. I can't understand why she says she wants to get out of the country to meet me. She wants to get to know me better before I come to her country. She says now she is going to Italy to visit her girlfriend who has been there for 8 years. she said I can go but wouldn't get to spend all the time together. Should I go? Maybe I can meet her in Montenegro or Moldavia there is travel without visa regime with these countries for ukrainians. I am 43 and she is 36 so it is good age difference. Dose anyone have helpful insight?

durak

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	Send: 5/20/2010 5:30:17 PM

I don't know whether any of this will be helpful, but my 2 cents: 1. Her attitude is very unusual. Most Ukrainian women would be happy to meet a man of genuine interest to them in their home country. If they don't prefer their home town, there are pleasant cities in which to meet. 2. Turkey is a common tourist destination for Americans. Though there is sporadic anti-Western terrorist activity there, very few tourists have been harmed, and as far as I know, no Americans. Turkey is not on the list of countries for which the US State Dept. currently gives travel warnings or special advisories. 3. If you wanted to meet in the Dominican Republic, it is not difficult to book a flight which won't require a Ukrainian citizen to get a visa. 4. I have been to D.R. only once, in mid-July, and temperatures weren't bad -- comparable to hot summer days here in the NY metro area where I live. At a resort, you would be spending plenty of time either in the water, or in an air-conditioned room. 5. "I can't understand why she says she wants to get out of the country to meet me." Unless I am much mistaken, she is more interested in a subsidized holiday, than in a real relationship with you. I knew a Ukrainian girl who fell in love with a guy in Russia (a relationship that began with email-only contact). She would make 24-hour train rides (each way!) at her own expense, to stay with him in a tiny, shabby apartment. See the contrast with your girl?

FSULover

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	Send: 5/20/2010 5:56:34 PM

If I were you, I would have gone to Turkey and be done with it. Maybe she is ashamed of her living situation. It happens. I had girlfriends who wanted to introduce me to their countries and families right away, but also girlfriends who did everything possible to prevent me from meeting their families. None was a scammer. However, like durak said, she may just want a nice vacation with you ... but she may fall really in love with you there, if she was not already in love. All you have to do is be nice to her. My question for you is: why are you making so many excuses? You are not the woman. She is. She expects you to be the MAN. Which excuses are you making? 1.- Thailand is too far (although Thailand is in a war right now) 2.- Turkey is not good for Americans (I have been there three times. Always excellent) 3.- Dominican Republic is too hot (have you been to Turkey in July? That's hot!!!) 4.- I will not see her 24 hours a day in Italy Grow a pair!

BIGREDMACHINE

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	Send: 5/20/2010 6:42:14 PM

FSUlover Thanks, i've got a set! you big bad forum tough guy. Stop acting so juvenile. Try to practice some civility.

BIGREDMACHINE

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	Send: 5/20/2010 6:46:43 PM

Thank you Durak, I appreciate your mindful analysis of the situation.

RodanTsunami

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	Send: 5/20/2010 9:56:53 PM

It seems odd to me that you have been in communication for 2 years and still find ways not to meet. If she will not meet in Sumy for whatever reason, it is my perspective you should not challenge that. Could be family or ex's. Still, I would not chase her all over the world and be met with excuses again. Many of us have been stood up before. My advice, meet her in Kiev,she can get there without excuse and if you meet with failure, you can return home or remain in Kiev. If you first meeting is complex or meet in another country failure will be amplified with expense and time. If she will not meet you on neutral ground in her own country, you have something to reflect on.

BIGREDMACHINE

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	Send: 5/20/2010 11:08:41 PM

Rodan Tsunami thanks for your point of view. You are making a lot of sense. I used to go from girl to girl took a break from that type of thing. Now I am focusing on one woman and making it a quality relationship. It just developed from friends to relationship over time no BS. I am going to tell her that I will meet her on neutral ground within her country. I thank you for your input.

GeminiDreams

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	Send: 5/20/2010 11:20:44 PM

Both Italy and Spain are part of the shengen zone. If she can go to italy she can go to Spain. One visa fits all!

BIGREDMACHINE

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	Send: 5/20/2010 11:35:29 PM

Right she just needs a shengen visa. Named after the town of shengen in Luxembourg where the treaty was signed.

kiwinorth

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	Send: 5/21/2010 12:56:24 AM

i stopped reading not long after said you bought a ticket for her.. dude what are you doing? hey i haven't paid for a ticket for a girl coming to NZ in a few weeks.. and i have met her:) yeah tight pr*ck or not stupid. the whole point of meeting is checking out her background before you do anything different to that,, she's got you wrapped around her little finger, not good, bad sign. first visit has to be family based or an angle to her background. don't you want to check her out at minimum cost, time effort and all that? maybe you have more money then brain cells then OK sweet but it still will not tell you anything about her.. be more forceful, say you are visiting her at her home now, enough's enough, be interesting how things will develop from that... don't let them manipulate you like that, really its a very bad sign dude. good luck

Mini Cooper

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	Send: 5/21/2010 2:29:42 AM

The first time I met my fiancee was in Crimea for a wonderful 7 days... after that we became a "couple" and promissed not to date other people. With her I have visited Turkey, Lviv, Kiev and her home town of Zaprodyzie. She simply likes to leave her meager surroundings (I can't blame her)and visit some place other than her dirty home town. Perhaps your girl is the same. Dansing... shut up cave man.

durak

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	Send: 5/21/2010 11:13:37 AM

Mini Cooper -- I agree, about her likely having good reasons, for not wanting to meet in her home town. I just flew a Russian girl to another city in Russia, who didn't want to make our first meeting in her home town. But the Black Sea resorts, the capital city of Kyiv, and beautiful historic Lviv, are all excellent places to make a romantic meeting in Ukraine. It is the insistence on a third country, that seems odd to me, and I think quite unusual.

ragingbull

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	Send: 5/21/2010 12:41:36 PM

In my case, she wanted to escape gossip. It would be alright in the gossip community if we get married and then visit. But, if we are not married and I visit, especially being a brown man, we would be opening ourselves to be the talk of the town. We stayed in Kiev and Yalta. Her town is Kerch. Even in Yalta, she would not give affection in front of the window. She was afraid of the gossips from people she did not know.

gecko

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	Send: 5/22/2010 4:47:10 PM

Any self respecting woman would never ask a guy she has never met for a ticket to another country. this is the attitude of a whore. and it sounds as if your very naive and don't have much experience with women. would a woman from your own country ask that for a blind date. let me ask you a question, if someone came 3000 miles to come see you, would you appreciate it? or would you demand that they see you in another country? excuse me but you need some common sense.

Rag'n'Bull

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	Send: 5/22/2010 5:06:02 PM

VIGREDMACHINE, Having previously lived in Luxembourg for a number of years I may assure you that Schengen, rather than Shengen, is a tiny village rather than a town as you claim.

Muzzy

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	Send: 5/22/2010 5:15:46 PM

Fellas, fellas - what's with the feeding frenzy? The guy's just asking a question! If anyone knows anything about this whole area of FSU dating, you'll know there's plenty of false information, bad advice and just plain scammers out there - from the seemingly 'professional' agencies to the individual scammers themselves who, if they weren't very good and convincing at what they do, wouldn't be making a living from it now, would they? I'm a researcher by nature, but even I found acclimatising to this kind of thing to be head spinning. I was lucky in that when I asked questions on here, I simply got helpful answers, instead of having my head bitten off for having the temerity for not already knowing everything. As far as this forum goes, it seems I had a lucky escape. Brian, what gecko's saying is, at the heart of it, good advice. Although lots of people will tell you differently, dating an FSU girl should be no different from dating a girl from any western country (distance notwithstanding). They actually want the same things (by & large), have the same dreams and desires, and the same expectations. Don't let the various agencies, websites and other bogus 'advice' sources tell you different. Don't expect or tolerate anything from an FSU girl that you wouldn't from a girl in the next street to you. A few of the guys have mentioned that some girls don't want to be seen with a guy until they know it's serious, simply to avoid being the target for gossip - but nobody wants to be a target for gossip, do they? Usually these girls (and I know a few) are happy to meet, but just in a different town (a few dollars train ride away). This is understandable. A girl who insists on meeting in another country? Well, if this is how much meeting her costs, how much to marry her? How much to live together? If you met this girl at home, and she wanted your first date to be abroad, you'd call her a gold digger, wouldn't you? That she's from another country doesn't change that. A little tip. There's a few decent human beings on here who actually exchange advice. Pretty easy to spot among the wildlife. If you want advice without the character assassination, try PM-ing them. It'll make your life much easier. Whatever you decide, I hope it goes well for you. (PS. Martin, having looked at this forum for a number of seconds, I can assure you that his name is BIGREDMACHINE, rather than VIGREDMACHINE as you claim :P)

Rag'n'Bull

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	Send: 5/22/2010 5:46:34 PM

But V is next to B in subdued lighting Muzzy as I'm watching Auf Wiedersehen, Pet after another hard day of fitting a kitchen :)

Muzzy

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	Send: 5/22/2010 6:07:51 PM

Surely you mean Suf Qiedersehen, Pet! :D Hope the kitchen fitting went well :)

BIGREDMACHINE

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	Send: 5/22/2010 6:12:37 PM

After talking on the phone. We agreed on meeting in her country. I do have plenty experience with women. I came to this forum to gain experience with one Ukrainian woman. Some of the people in this forum are cool headed. some just want to sling s**t. I wish you all the best. I am not all warm and fuzzy no way! Keep trading the hate let me know how that works out for you all.

Rag'n'Bull

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	Send: 5/22/2010 6:27:59 PM

Alas several (and more) days of kitchen work to go, regardless of constructing and fixing the cupboards, there's the filling and painting of walls, painting of pipes, staining, varnishing, and fixing of skirting boards, fitting the new spashback and cooker hood, wiring in the new ceramic hob, oven, cooker hood, and new black nickel effect electrical fittings, fitting and plumbing in the new sink, sizing and fitting the new worktops and retiling the walls immediately above the worktops ..... and not neccessarily in that order. And all this from a bloke that, supposedly, doesn't even own a house, this house. :)

Russian brides > Main Forum > girl does not want to meet in Ukraine