**A lot of Ukrianian women now, don't even want to work. They want to be be a house wife according to TCH, It's in Ukrainian if you understand news channel.**
You know, Ukrainians only smile watching news in our country))) All mass media always exaggerates all the information. In fact there are only few ladies who would prefer to stay at home abd be a housewife, even is the lady has a comfortable life, her husband earns good money for both of them, she would prefer to have a bussiness to do. But... please don't consider it like carier is more important for her. No! Our Ukrainian ladies... they always want to be successful in everything: to create a coziness, to cook, to bring up children, to look nice and to go to work. All ladies in my family and all my friends, they DO NOT like to stay at home and just be a housewife. Yes, you could tell that they do it just to earn money for living. Of course, it's important, but if I offer all these ladies that I give them their salary and they could choose 2 options: to work and get this salary or don't work and be jist a housewife. About 90% will choose to work (if they like it, if no - they will choose their job), and not more than 10% would love to stay at home to do all differen home work and read newspapaers. I do remember only one lady who get married a foreign man and decided stay at home, others were temporary housewives until they found a new job abroad.
**there are 25 year olds who say they are prepared to consider men from 25 to 60**
I hope you never believed in such "sincere" intentions of the lady. 60 old man is almost a grandather for such lady. In 95% it's not true desires of the lady. It means that lady or/and her agency wants to earn money only. that's all. And only in about 5% a lady would like to meet a good man who is young, around 35, but in case she meets a good man who is rich and can provide a luxury life for her it will be ok for her. So giving her youth, beauty and tenderness to him she gets luxury life in return. If it's ok for both, why not? But unfortunately many of you could think that it's sincere words, when a lady who is 25-30 years than you writes about love to you. Never believe in it!
Rule #1 Never contact ladies who are more than 20 years younger
Rule #2 Never send the money to a lady you never met
I heard that still there are men who send the money to ladies wihtout seeing you. I hope you don't do this. You will just waste of your time and money. It's better to spend it for a right woman search.
As to 28 yo lady, who is looking for a man up to 30 yo local man, and up to 55 yo foreign man.
There are some explanations:
- the agency put the age difference up to 55 instead of her own desite - up to 30
- she works on that site (so the age difference is too big) but at the same time she is interested to meet a man for serious relationship. Maybe he is from ukraine, maybe from other country, doesn't matter but only up to 30.
- if it was her decision to put up to 55 that it's a story above (luxury life+youth)
What is the best option for you? What do you prefer?
Men from Western countries look younger thier age (or maybe our men lok older )) ). but not in 55 like a 30 guy, do you agree?
30 yo foreign man in about 80% is not so experienced in relationship and life as local 30 yo man. In our country 30 yo man is usually a father, maybe even twice)) For ex my father in 25 had 2 kids. And most of foreigners start thinking about the family in their 30s. And ladies feel that. that's only one reason I advice a couple some age difference. Of course there are few, very few exception. One of my client (lady) got marry American guy who was 31, 1 year younger than she was.
You really do not understand the 'game' of FSU woman-Western man. You are saying that a young girl is prepared to consider an older man so that he looks after her, of course yes!
Don't you know that most FSU girls have as a main reason to want to marry a foreign man that he gets her out of her country and into the West? All of us reasonably intelligent men know it and accept it. We also accept their reasons for the age difference. All we are asking for is love, loyalty, commitment and understanding. Most girls will get their own job and contribute money to the household.
However, the honest ones admit to wanting to be taken to the West and that they do not want some poor layabout but they also say that they have to be satisfied that they can love the man. I was in conmunication with a girl who told me she had already turned down 2 marriage proposals from men who promised her a Canadian and USA visas as she knew she could not love either of them, visa or no visa.
Please do not insult my 28 year old friend. You base your arguments on pure speculation. As it happens I am working on a relationship with her. She knows well I am not rich. She went to the website where I met her with all her ID papers to verify her identity. I have carried out a substantial investigation on her in the Internet. I have been speaking to her for months and she has never asked me a single question about my income, house, car or anything related to money. No hints from her about needing money, coming to see me (she won't) or a sick relative.
She does not work for any agency. She put her profiles only in agencies that only charge men a nominal amount for the monthly subscription, no pay per anything.
She made it clear in her local dating agency profile that she does not want local rich, married men, fathers etc. looking for a girl to have sex with. If she gets involved with an older man, he has to be single and prepared for full commitment - she has told me this in no uncertain terms.
You know what, with this girl, I would gladly send her money for her to improve her English but she does not ask for it. I am very careful who I talk to in dating sites.
The girl is great and I will be lucky if I can beat a local decent man she could find at any moment.
I will tell you the only rule: There are no rules.
**MagicLove, You really do not understand the 'game' of FSU woman-Western man.**
me??? :))) Do you really think that I do not know true intentions of women working with hundreds of them for about 7 years? If I don't know the thuth, what is inside of marriage agencies and ladies' intentions, I would never come here. Again, I don't say that all are bad or all are good!
WIFESEEKER, in every word you wrote about your lady I feel that you really want to be with her. And I really wish she is sincere with you. I hope she will make you hapy! Fingers crossed )) There are many men who trusted ladies, but then were fooled. I just don't want you are one of them. By the way what is the site she went to with her ID papers? (I'm not sure if it's allowed to write other dating sites names here, please better in PM). Still you never met this lady, haven't u?
And you are right, there are exceptions on any rules:)
I'd like to ask you guys about age difference in your countries: if you know many couples of local people with such a large age difference as 15-25 years? Or you mostly choose UA ladies who are so much younger only because they don't care about the difference? Just curious..)
And one more things. You so often complain about scam, about not successful meetings or visit Ukraine, after you waste your time and much of money. And here are at least (as I understand now) 2 persons who are willing to help you not to make any mistakes, not to be fooled, to open your eyes and be more realistic. Do you want to accept any advices or information that could be helpful for you in your search?
Of course you could not believe but still there are people who are engaged with their work! Just for pleasure, not the money ))
One day I was talking to a bussiness partner, also my friend now, he is a foreigner (we are both crazy with the job we do, so we often meet and talking about it for hours:)) he mentioned about Odessa, one of the most favourite city for foreigners to come. Then I asked if he remembers many couples, many married people from Odessa. First he was thinking, then he was shocked that he can't remember anyone. What do you think? Why? of course, there are an exceptions.
Well here in Kiev. I know women don't want to work because they want to work, it's because they need the money.
It takes two people to work and make a suitable income. If the Ukrainian man says, look, I want you to stay at home and do whatever you want, like take a hobby, she will.
I know it can be boring for a Ukrainian Woman, but she can find stuff to do. If I didn't have to work, I'd be doing documentaries all day.
If you're a good looking 38 year old guy, you will have no problem finding a 21 year old. It's about love.
However if you're a gentleman in your 50's I do suggest going to smaller cities or villages.
People here in Kiev don't make much. Average salary in Kiev is 3,200UAH. A store manager makes no more than 6000UAH a month. Stay at home, Stay at home )))))) And read Cosmopolitan all day, and watch Master chef or alittle Воронины ))))
Over the past few years in Ukraine, Women again have looked at American Women and said.. Hey look, they're all working!!!! See girls, we should do the same. As sheep do follow other sheep quite well.
And look what happened? There was a story of how American women now want to quit their job to be with their family more often, because they don't spend their time all together.
You talk about work work work, of how, hey, we will be like the west more if we act like them. This is not true. You're being used as slaves, and all that work for what? You should raise a family, be with kids. To spend those special moments. Don't be so delusional, like joining the EU, that anything will change.
Now if UA women read the new article, they will be saying, ok girls. Let's quit our jobs. Americans are doing it, so should we!.
That is right, you do not understand the FSU-Western man game. On the one hand you say that not all women are bad, on the other hand you compared my friend against your standard check list and you decided that she is bad and you gave me a list of the bad things about her with no basis for it.
Of course I want this girl, she is the first girl I noticed and communicated with. Several other girls have come and gone and she is consistent, she is always there, she does not ask for anything except that I come to see her - all honest girls want to see you in the flesh before deciding on you. She has told me several times when she is not happy or disappointed and makes no demands. It took me a few months before she gave me her Skype address, email and phone number. She is very cautious about this.
I do not see the reason for giving you the name of the agency I am using. I already carried out a lot of research on agencies before I decided on the one I am using. You will have nothing to add to it.
BTW, the agency removed a girl who had already shown them her papers to identify herself and she got a 'verified' badge on her profile. I knew she was real as I had substantial communications with her. But they removed her because I reported her and I knew she was not a scammer. She asked me for money saying that I should prove my commitment to her. I said no and she got angry and became rude. She also told me she had been rude to other men. A young and naive girl. She left me no option but to report her.
If everything is good why are you not booking a flight? I find it so bizarre how someone will keep this fantasy going in their head and never actually go see how she lives and meet her. Especially if she is asking you to come.
As I said in other posts if spending a couple grand going over to see her is a problem you might as we'll stop talking to her now. Stop wasting your time and hers.
Your comments about Irina show you don't have a clue what it is really like in Ukraine. Have you ever been to a developing country? Do you have any idea what poverty really is like?
If your 8 year old son didn't have a decent pair of boots for the winter and is wearing clothes too small for him because you have no money what would you do to try and provide for him?
Yes I bought him new clothes last trip, if I say I have feelings for her how could I not fix that when I know how much she loves her son. I got him a playstation also. Best money I ever spent.
Every relationship is formed on the basis of mutual interest and mutual benefit. If you think this is wrong then keep living your internet fantasy relationship for 20 or so bucks a month. Just realize it's never going to be real until you go and meet her.
Why would I need to give you an explanation as to why I have not been able to go and see this girl? I have given her a substantial explanation and she is satisfied. Now let me see who I care if he/she is happy with my explanation.....
I have got substantial contact with developing countries. So much so that I can give you several stories of poor people who would do anything but steal (like scamming foreign men) or prostitute themselves to survive.
For your information, I have been to the Ukraine 4 times and another 4 timex to Russia.
All I am saying is I would not go anywhere near your Irina. You can make up all excuses for her to convince yourself she is fine, like talking about the Ukraine as if it was Africa. Why do you think most of these girls are so fit and beautiful, because they were malnourished and neglected in childhood?
As you say, to each his own. If you knew a thing or two about my girl you would problaby say you would not want her.
dh7, how wise you are!!! I completely agre to you.
That's why such sites like Anastasia exists! about 80% ladies stays in chat for money, and about 90% men know that but STILL men don't stop chatting coz they buy such "relationship" and it's enough for them. I have nothing against if it's a deal of both. lady earns the money for spending her time with a man who pays for that and It's ok if both agrees to do that. But it's not a amrriage agency, no!
WS, please understand me correctly, I don't want and I can't tel you anything bad about your girl. I just said the facts to think about, to pay your attention to them and to be careful. I will be very glad if things will go well and you get marry. If you are communicating with her for months very soon she will come to the moment when she is very tired to invite you to come to Ukraine. You wrote that she never asked u for money. but have u ever helped you with anything?
As for me, if i'm very serious about the man I communicate with I would ask him even about his house and a car, and it doesn't say that it's all about money. I says Im interested in everything that is connected with his daily life. which color of the car he drives everyday, is the room is bright or dark where he stays, etc. And I will be happy to share with him. If you are so far from each other you should both imagine how you live daily life. And I think that if the lady considers man as a future partner, husband, she would ask you where you live.
dh7 id completely right, if everything is so wonderful as you descibe why don't you buy tickets and come to meet her? Many men are afraid to destroy the fanasy where they live with ladies. and that's why you don't like my advices to be very careful and realistic!
I'm sorry guys but I don't believe in a big age difference, based only on feelings!
I have said several times that I have very good reasons for not being able to go and see the lady and I do not need to give them to people here, only to her!
Live in a fantasy without meeting her? I am dying to go to see her and she knows it!
However, yes there is a great risk that she will get tired of waiting for me to go and see her. Even worse, another guy could get there first. I have already told her this, if another guy gets there first and she says yes to him, I will shed a tear but will have to accept it. Then there are the risks of language misunderstandings, she told me she was really sad by me telling her to go and find another guy. I said that is not what I meant! Anyhow, she now understands. I really like her because of her attitude: she asks but makes no demands, there are no recriminations from her whatsoever. She never starts an argument. I can learn a thing or two from her about a loving relationship, that is why I want her (well apart from the fact that she is gorgeous).
There are two people here who are my number one priority, over any FSU lady. Tough, that is the way it is and I am working like a donkey to reconcile the two things. See if the lady waits for me to do so.
WS: I doubt very much you have been to Ukraine, and if you have been and this girl is so great then why are you making her wait? I call BS on that.
Ukraine is very much a 3rd world country and as for people starving to death, no that does not happen, but there are plenty of kids who are not getting the best diet and I have noticed several who are very much underweight, probably as much as are obese in Canada. These are not kids on a diet, their parents simply cannot afford to feed them properly.
The poverty in Ukraine is rampant, your comment shows you really do not have a clue, or you only noticed the BMW's and Mercedes which are driven by less than 1% of the population here.
Do you have a clue what an average income is in Ukraine (outside Kyiv)? around $300 per month!
I have no idea what the deal is with your contact in Ukraine but yes until you meet it is just a fantasy, before I had given up completely on women from Canada I was on match.com and even there if you were talking to someone for several weeks and then met them almost always the meeting in person was a disappointment for one person or the other because you paint a picture in your mind what this person is like and its just not the same until you are actually with each other.
Unless of course she is a pro scammer, she will keep talking to you and who knows how many other guys forever because she is probably banging some local guy anyway, its just a second source of income, and sometimes they play guys for a very long time so they can cash them in when required.
I have no proof that my girl is not as scammer. I have proof that yours is (you have told us she told you she was/is) and let me tell you another thing: a leopard never changes its spots.
Are you aware of this? scammer=thief plus yours is a liar too.
Not that I need to prove anything to you but I have been to Ukraine and Russia 4 times each and I have been in their their homes, stayed with them and eaten with them. In the middle of the winter too.
Right! where people do not drive BMWs and Mercedes poverty is rampant. That is your idea of poverty.
Keep believing what you want to justify your girl, Ukraine is not a third world country.
In what way do you justify theft by saying that they earn $300 a month outside Kiev? How does that make them miserable if a flat or room costs $100 a month to rent? They may be poor but they are not starving. They know how to get by without having to steal. The ones that steal only want more than the others have.
Not often I write on here, but thought I would comment on age difference. Having had some interesting comments on a thread I started a while back about my age, and was I fit or fat ??? Anyway I actually have been taking note of age differences more now in the UK. I am pleasantly surprised to see age differences of 25 years, 23 years and 20 years. I think it is a case if two people click, and if they do, are they happy with the age difference. I am 52 and talking to a lady of 28. We just click. I have asked her about the age gap. She was ok. I asked her what her parents would think of it. She said they would support her. The conversation with her is soooooo easy and soooooo relaxing it is great. We spend hours talking. Something may come of it and something may not. But I am relaxed. The age thing will keep going round and round and round for ever.....It is a case of....is it acceptable to you both.....
I will have to agree with you on this. I have said on other threads thay I have spoken to both young and older girls and the 'quality' of chat does not relate to the age difference at all. It frustrates me sometimes that I start talking to an older lady and the correspondence is all superficial and awkard. This conversation with a not so young girl is real:
Me: Hello how are you? what are you doing these days?
Her: Fine :-)
Me(think of something): So what are you doing now?
Me (at last something to talk about!): Nice, What are you cooking?
Her worst habit was that she only answered one question in each of my messages to her. If I asked her one question, she answered one question. If I asked her 5 question, she answered one. So I ended up asking her only on question per message. This went on for weeks! Grrrrr
With a girl in her early 20's:
We found we were both music lovers. We listed all the singers we liked, their songs, etc, etc. And we are not even of the same generation of music!
She has written me long messages all relating to my previous messages with answers to all my questions and no copied and pasted stuff. And her English is bad. I still talk to her; maybe I should just go for her and forget my own criteria about age difference.
If you really are compatible with somebody, one of you can speak English, the other Ukrainian and you will still find a way to communicate.
Of course communicating with a younger woman gives you vibrancy and energy. It makes you feel good.
But it's really not fair to a young lady to end up with an old bugger. She's not going to be happy. First of all there's no way you'll keep up with her in bed, (that is if you can get it up) and no way you'll keep up with her energy level in general.
She'll want to go out at 10PM. You'll want to go to bed.
Be fair to her. Have some consideration for someone besides yourself. Find someone in your own age category. Maybe a little younger, but not that young.