I will take her back on a trial run, but I only got divorced not long ago and I want the papers, I dont want to hear that because she came back to me divorce is off what a diaster that would be. A Belarussian friend will ring my lawyer in the morning for me to get the legal details.
My situation was very different, but the "common element" is that I was chasing something that was obviously a very long shot (I hope you can see that about your case, at least!)
One of the few smart things I did, was to promise myself, "I need to see (fill in your personal bottom line here), or I'm bailing out." I didn't stick to it exactly (and paid a big ugly price for that), but making this resolution was genuinely helpful in disentangling myself.
The rest of us can all see that this Zeppelin is going down in flames. The best thing you can do for yourself, is to resolve this chapter of your life as quickly as you can.
It is truly amazing what a fine piece of ass will do to a man's brain. Assuming of course it was fine. I had a photo of this knock out babe in my cubical a few years ago with the caption, "No matter good she looks now. Someone somewhere can't stand the bitch." This was to remind me of a previous 'relationship' I had.
Colin, Do you just want another moment of glory? Thinking - although I haven't a clue - that she was so fantastick a f--k that I have to have it one more time? ??????
Is it a stroke of the ego, or just plain old blind love? Go ahead spend a few more sacks of jiz on her. And also many more sacks of money. The ratio of jiz to money is not worth it. Unless you have resigned yourself to the fact that she is nothing more than a very high priced call girl. ?She only calls when she needs money. Hell, tag team it with momma. Seems they are in business together anyway. Get you money's worth. Because it will be short lived. Hell, marry them both. Move to Utah.
ha I will enjoy my time with her, everyone goes into a relationship looking for something maybe a man for sex or compionship ,woman security and yes maybe money, it becomes something good when you no longer look for this something but instead want to give instead,, nothing to do with my situation just random thoughts haha yes she is a fine piece of ass, and its a second roll of the dice to see how it goes, its more of a case that I dont wanna regret in the future that I didnt give it one more shot thats all. I may fall down on my face again but this time I dont have 2 invest money as much,her flight only cost 130 euros, small money, of course emotional damage is worse but I think hope Im stronger now. Ive been with a few girls since her and none have affected me at all.
"I will enjoy my time with her, everyone goes into a relationship looking for something maybe a man for sex or compionship ,woman security and yes maybe money, it becomes something good when you no longer look for this something but instead want to give instead,, nothing to do with my situation..." - Colin
As was stated in the past, ...
Never mind. Good luck. I hope your dream is realized.
I feel now that this whole story was a charade. Congratulations Colin! You have sucked some of us into your story. Was this a research endeavor for a psycholgy class you are taking? You're welcome.
I do acknowledge you post in the other thread :) but I'll refrain from replying to it for fear of acting as a magnet ..... think about it!
I can understand Colin's perspective, been there, done that, got the tee shirt! Colin feels he needs to give it, exhaust it, 100% or he'll always be wondering, for the rest of his life, "What if?".
I truly believe that Colin is thinking with the head he has above his shoulders, rather than the head he has between his legs, and he's going to give it this one last try for the reason already mentioned.
I wouldn't talk badly of Colin merely because he asked for points of view, we provided it, for him then to disregard our points of view, let's allow the guy some space, his mind is giving this considerably more thought than our minds ever will, allow him some slack and perhaps Colin will be back in the future to report "good" or otherwise.
I do not believe this was a charade. I'm with Colin. A lifetime is a long time and if he doesn't go through with this, he will think of it the rest of his life. He has been warned. Furthermore, he already knew before he was warned. He just needed us to confirm whatever decision he makes.
When she left me the last time it was very hard, but at the same time I had gotten a injury from jogging (I was jogging with my doberman and he became nervous about a pram I was at the same time increasing my pace as a song had come onto mp3,boom straight over him and tore ligamenets and such in my ankle) so she was gone I couldnt train or jog this was very hard, im back to all that now and even before I heard from her I am happy every day and feeling good, Dating alot but not settling with anyone (maybe not wanting to get to close to anyone) And do I love her yes my mother says im obsessed with her and I probably am, my family will be against this which wil be hard they are very protective and were good to her when she was here ,(my sister would collect her and they would go for lunch) but thats another hurdle
Durak made an excellent point if it was adhered to in the beginning of many of these long distance relationships.
" "I need to see (fill in your personal bottom line here), or I'm bailing out." I didn't stick to it exactly (and paid a big ugly price for that), but making this resolution was genuinely helpful in disentangling myself.
If these words of wisdom are followed in the beginning of the relationships with the ladies of the FSU the road would be easier. I was lucky in the beginning, I had some excellent tutors here that have long since departed. "The sticking to it exactly is the critical thing." It was was told to me long ago. DO NOT DEFER FROM WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH NO MATTER HOW BEAUTIFUL SHE IS. This was drummed into my head along with never send money to someone you have never met and use scrutiny when you have met. Durak is correct and I've seen it time and time again, you pay a big ugly price. The internet is littered with losers who have cried foul because they didn't stay disciplined and blamed it on the woman. We control our own destiny.
Colin, good luck if this is really what you want. Just be careful my friend.